[Scene: Bucklands. Prue's office. She's talking into a tape recorder. A client is there with her.]
Prue: Painting of a gothic castle, artist unknown, circa 1920s, oil on canvas, 20x28. Miss Franklin, where did you say you got this?
Miss Franklin: Oh, I... I inherited it. A few months ago but its been in my family for generations.
Prue: The composition is so unusual. The artists used pure colors, straight from the tube and then varnished each layer over and ...
Miss Franklin: Uh, Im sorry for interrupting. But do I really need to be here.
Prue: No, of course not. Its just that most people prefer to be at an appraisal, especially when they on selling the piece.
Miss Franklin: Its just, Im kind of in a hurry.
Prue: Say no more. Just sign at the bottom and youre free to go.
Miss Franklin: Thankyou. (She signs it.) So, how long do you think it will take to sell it?
Prue: Well, Ill need to see ownership records before I can do anything.
Miss Franklin: Ill send you everything I have. So, is that all, then?
Prue: Uh, no, since you definitely want to sell the piece, Ill need to confirm its authenticity, its physical condition, so if youll just sign at the bottom, that will let us go ahead and X-ray the piece.
Miss Franklin: Done. (She signs it.) Anything else?
Prue: Uh, well, yes, Miss Franklin, I would really like the time to research this. That way I can get you the best price.
Miss Franklin: Look, I... I appreciate your professionalism... I really do, but Im not interested in getting the best price... I just want you to sell that painting, as soon as you can, right? Good night, Miss Halliwell.
(They shake hands.)
Prue: Good night.
(Miss Franklin leaves.)
[Scene: Piper is in the club and Phoebe is in Web San Francisco. Phoebe and Piper are on the phone.]
Phoebe: Piper it was an accident. Its not like I borrowed Prues car, so I could drive it into a pole.
Piper: How bads the damage?
Phoebe: Not bad but maybe expensive. Which is why I need a favor.
Piper: If youre calling to borrow money, I dont have any.
Phoebe: No, its not about money. Its just I dont want you to tell Prue. Shes been so supportive and I dont want to lose her trust again.
Piper: You mean, you havent told her?
Phoebe: Well, not yet. But I-I have a plan.
Piper: Phoebe, you have to tell her. Its her car and you dont have money to fix it.
Phoebe: But I will have the money to fix it. Im at this company called Web San Francisco, its an interactive network on the internet, and I faxed them my résumé this morning, and they want to meet with me, tonight.
Piper: Ive got to go, but Phoebe, I dont want to be in the middle of this, just tell her, okay?
Phoebe: If I dont get the job, I will tell her.
(They hang up the phone. Phoebe sees a room with a lot of people trying the job.)
Phoebe: Hello, Im Phoebe Halliwell. I have an appointment. (the secretary hands her an aptitude test) thanks. All these people... theyre here for the interview, too, arent they?
Secretary: Well, you wont have any trouble with this if you figured that out. Its an aptitude test. You can finish it at home.
Phoebe: Great. Great.
(Phoebe sits down and hears two people talking.)
Applicant #1: So, you won a fellowship from the National Science Foundation.
Applicant #2 When I was at Harvard, yeah. Howd you know?
Applicant #1: Saw it on your résumé. I was cum laude also, except I was a Ford Foundation Scholar.
Applicant #2: So, then, you must have gone to... Stanford?
Secretary: Stanford? I went to Stanford.
Applicant #3: (to Phoebe) Intimidating, isnt it?
Phoebe: The Good Will Hunting or this aptitude test?
Applicant #3: Who cares about linear algebra or differential. And that test is a snap. I mean, in this day and age, who cant write in the HTML numeric languages, right?
Phoebe: Right. (laughing nervously) Yeah. Thats for you. (Phoebe leaves.)
[Scene: Bucklands. Prue's office. Prue sees a light in the painting.]
Prue: What? (She gets a magnifying glass and looks closer at the painting. She sees a man and a fireball.) Ooh!
Opening Credits
[Scene: Halliwell manor. Kitchen.]
Prue: At first I just thought that it was a reflection off of something in the room but then when I moved closer, I saw a man... inside the painting... in the castle. Right, but the moment I saw him, he backed away from the window, and then there was this... strange glow that went past the window.. it was so... (She looks at Piper who is looking some papers.) Piper!!!
Piper: What?
Prue: We were talking?Piper: I know. About a man in a painting.. listen to this one. "Hallway near club entrance too narrow"?
Prue: I thought that we had discussed your code violations.Piper: Well, I keep finding more. The plumbing, the electrical, the heating, it... none of it is up code.
Prue: Stop. Youre obsessing.Piper: Well, it runs in the family.
Prue: I dont obsess. I think... intensely... anyway, I cant really help it. I mean, weve seen so many bizarre things, why not a man in a painting.Piper: Well, at least hes safe from Building Inspector. I cant imagine that castles up to code.
Phoebe: Im sorry but I couldnt find anything in the Book of Shadows about people who may be trapped inside painting. I looked everywhere.
Piper: Hey, You were asleep by the time I got home. How did your interview do?
Phoebe: It went fine. Uh, actually, its still going. I have to finish this take-home aptitude test which I actually think I will start right now. So I will see you guys later.
(Piper gives her "the look".)
Prue: Uh, Phoebe?Phoebe: What?
Prue: Arent you forgetting something? My car keys?Phoebe: Theyd be with your car... which is at the body shop having an estimate.
Prue: An estimate?(Piper pretends to be reading her code violations.)
Phoebe: Yeah, uh, I... bumped... No, actually I backed your car into a pole last night.
Prue: (smiling) A pole? You hit a pole?Phoebe: Yeah, you dont even have to say it. I know what youre thinking. How could I be so irresponsible? How could I be so stupid?
Prue: Okay, irresponsible, yes. Stupid, no way. Wheres that coming from?Phoebe: Its coming from the fact that Im the youngest sister, the one who always makes mistakes... (Prue looks at Piper) The one who always causes problems. I mean, if anybody were gonna back your car into a pole and not tell you right away, itd be me, right?
(Prue looks at her, tenderly.)
Piper: I think Ill just be going now.
Phoebe: See? Even the middle sister. The one thats supposed to stay neutral when it comes to family checks out on this one.
Piper: Yes, youre right. Youre on your own.
Prue: Well, leave me out of it, too. I dont want to argue with you. I just want to find a cab.Phoebe: Well, whatever it costs, I will pay for the damages... and whatever the cab costs, I will pay for that too.
(Phoebe leaves.)
Prue: (laughing) Uh, what just happened here?Piper: I dont know anything about anything.
Prue: Piper!! Just forget about the car. What about the man in the painting?Piper: Well, unless hes real and screaming for help, forget about him. We shouldnt go looking for trouble. We have enough around here. Im going next door.
[Cut to outside Dan's house. Piper picks up his paper off the stairs. Dan opens the door before she can knock.]
Piper: Dan!Dan: Good Morning!
Piper: Im sorry to bother you. Dan: No, youre not bothering me. Unless you refuse to hand over my paper.(She hands it to him.)
Piper: Oh, uh, all yours. Dan: Thanks. Uh, you wanna... come in? Piper: No, no really, I just stopped by to ask a quick favor. My club received a visit from a D.B.I. last night. Dan: And youve got code violations. Piper: I have the war and peace of code violations.(Piper hands him the code violations.)
Dan: And you were thinking, what? Neighbor Dan, hes in construction, maybe he could help, huh? Piper: Of course Ill pay you... something.Jenny: Uncle D., Im late. Hey, Piper.
Piper: Hi Jenny.Jenny: See you later, Uncle Dan. And dont forget your promise.
(Jenny leaves.)
Dan: Ok, then, um, Ill tell you what I can do. Ill check out the code violations. See how serious they really are. If youll help me with the promise I made Jenny. Piper: Deal. Wait... Uh, whats the promise? Dan: She needs help with a paper. Its for her Bio class, you know, something about within the human reproductive system... Piper: Oh, ha... you mean, Sex... Dan: Its just way to awkward for me to talk to my niece about. Piper: Yeah, ha... sure, not to worry. I have plenty of experience. Dan: Really... with with Sex? Piper: No... I mean, uh... talking about it. (Dan laughs. Smiling nervous.) Yeah!!![Scene: Bucklands.]
Miss Franklin: So, uh, was there a problem with any of the ownership records that I sent over?
Prue: No, uh... everythings in order.Miss Franklin: Then Im not sure why you wanted meet with me.
Prue: Look. Ms. Franklin, I know that you dont really want to be here, so Ill be perfectly honest. Theres something.... strange about that painting Miss Franklin: Have you seen him? Prue: Him? Miss Franklin: Thats how it all starts, you know? Prue: What do you mean? Miss Franklin: At first, you see him. The man inside the painting. At least, you think you see him. But he just... he disappears so fast. And you start to think about it. But it doest make any sense. I mean, how could a man be inside a painting? Then you see him again. This time longer. And now youre sure. Prue: So, you think that the painting is haunted by a ghost? Miss Franklin: Oh, no no. I think hes definitely alive. I think hes trapped inside. Prue: Do you know who he is? Miss Franklin: No, I have no idea. Nobody does. Look, all I know is if I dont get rid of that painting, Im gonna end up just like everybody else in my family whos ever owned it,. Im gonna be completely insane. Prue: Ms. Franklin. Miss Franklin: No, youve only seen the beginning, Ms. Halliwell. Just trust me when I tell you. Its only gonna get worse.(She leaves.)
[Scene: Phoebe's bedroom. Phoebe is writing a spell.]
Phoebe: "Spirits... send... the.. words... from all..."(Piper knocks the door)
Piper: Its me. Can I come in? Phoebe: Uh, Piper, I really just wanna be alone right now. Piper: I wont stay long, I promise. Phoebe: All right, just give me a sec. (she hides the Book of Shadows) ok, you can come in now?(Piper opens the door)
Piper: I just wanted to tell you, uh... the body shop called Phoebe: Yeah, I know, I heard the message. 1200 bucks Piper: Did you tell Prue? Phoebe: I didnt have to. She already knew. She called the body shop herself. Thats why I have got to get this job, Piper. Its the only way I can pay for the damages. Its the only way that I can make things right. Piper: All the more reason you shouldve told her. Phoebe: (upset) Okay, well. Maybe a smarter person would have figured that out. Than again a smart person wouldnt of backed a car into a pole. A smart person would have realized that it was a $1200 pole. Thats because smart people dont do stupid things, only stupid people do. Piper: Phoebe, I didnt mean to upset you. Phoebe: I know. Maybe we should just talk later. Piper: Ok. Youre sure youre gonna be ok? Phoebe: Yeah, why? Piper: Phoebe, I know you think getting this job is the answer, but please just dont do anything... Phoebe: What? Stupid? Piper: No... just dont do anything I wouldnt do. Phoebe: Dont worry. I wont. (Piper leaves the room) You would never cast a smart spell. (Reading quick the spell) 24 hours, from 7 to 7, I will understand... all meaning... from here... to heaven. (casting the spell) "Spirits, send the words from all across the land. Allow me to absorb them through the touch of either hand. For 24 hours, from 7 to 7, I will understand all meaning of the words, from here to heaven... Oh, and P.S. there will be no personal gain. (Phoebe put a dictionary on the bed and starts to absorb the words.) "Abaca: Stronger fiber obtained from a banana leaf. Zygote: A cell formed by the union of 2 gametes"... Cool!!![Scene: Bucklands.]
Prue: Hey, Joe. That was fast.Joe: No line at the X-Ray machine.
Prue: So, did the X-Ray confirm its authenticity? Joe: It did a lot more than that. Check out the X-Ray. Its got definitive underwriting on the canvas. Prue: It has a pentimento? Joe: Yeah, I couldnt believe it either. But you can see it on the X-Ray. The text is in Latin. Ive never seen anything like it before. Prue: "Absolvo Amitto Amplus Brevis" to free what is lost say these words. Joe: Wow... You speak Latin? Prue: Yes. Good night, Joe. Joe: Okay, well, uh, why dont I just return the painting to the vault... say tomorrow? Prue: Good idea. Joe: Okay.(Joe leaves. Prue moves closer to the painting and sees the word 'HELP' written on a window.)
Prue: HELP... okay... "SEMPER MEA" Mine forever. (Prue cast the whole spell.) "Absolvo Amitto Amplus Brevis Semper Mea" (She gets sucked into the painting.) Oh, no. Oh![Cut to inside the castle. Prue falls on the floor.]
Commercial Break
[Scene: Castle.]
Prue: Whos there?(A big fireball flies across the room. Prue ducks.)
Malcolm: Quick! Follow me! Prue: What? Malcolm: This way. Ladies first. I see you read Latin too. Prue: What has happened? Where am I? Malcolm: Virden Castle. Prue: Where is that? Malcolm: Inside the painting Prue: Im trapped inside the painting? Malcolm: Yes and if you dont get to that bookcase, youre dead. Prue: Who are you? Malcolm: My names Malcolm and you were supposed to help me, not join me. Who are you, anyway? Prue: Oh, my names Prue and I was helping you. You were supposed to come out. Malcolm: Great. Now were both trapped. Hurry.(They run to the bookcase. A fireball heads for them but Prue moves it with her powers.)
Malcolm: What the hell? What are you? Howd you do that? Prue: Oh, never mind. Were gonna get killed. Will you hurry up?(Malcolm opens the bookcase. They go inside.)
[Scene: Halliwell manor.
Kitchen. It's morning.] Piper: Hi Phoebe. Youre up early. Whats up? Phoebe: Oh, the Dow Jones, housing prices and space shuttle discovery. Piper: Huh? Phoebe: Read the paper. Piper: Oh. Uh, have you seen Prue this morning? Phoebe: Not yet. Oh, uh, Dan just called. Said hed meet you at the club at noon. Piper: Okay, uh, did you hear her come in last night? Phoebe: Nope. Piper: This is really... strange. Cat hasnt been fed. No coffees been made. And Prue definitely didnt pack a lunch. Phoebe: Maybe shes still asleep. Piper: No, I checked her room. Her bed hasnt been slept in. Phoebe: Maybe she didnt come home from the office last night.(Piper is on the phone)
Piper: No, its her voice mail. What if Prues right about the painting? What if somethings happened? Phoebe: First off, 63% of all adults believed to be missing show up within 24 hours. An auto accident is unlikey 1.2% even less likely for work related accident. Factor in her good health, a life expectancy of 78.5 years, add her defensive powers of telekinesis, and we are looking at the odds of... less than 4.1%... No, actually make less than 3.3%. I forgot that the Book of Shadows had zip on evil artwork Piper: Whats wrong with you? Phoebe: Nothing Piper: No, youre like "ask rainman.com". You havent been in the Book of Shadows, have you? Phoebe: No, why would I do that? Piper: All right, I dont have time for this. Uh, Im gonna go to Bucklands. Phoebe: What about Dan? Youre supposed to meet him at the club Piper: Damn it. Phoebe: Do you like him? Is that the vibe that Im getting right now? Piper: No. Dont be ridiculous. Phoebe: Mmm. Piper: Just do me a favor and go in my place. And then you can give me all the details later. Phoebe: Like what he was wearing?(Piper is leaving.)
Piper: No![Scene: Castle. In the bookcase.]
Prue: You cant just stand there another 12 hours and not let me help you. Youre hurt. Malcolm: Stay where you are. I hate witches. Prue: How many times do I have to tell you that Im a good witch? Although, if you make me say that again, I just may hurt you. Look, I was trying to save you. Malcolm: Well, you did a great job. Prue: The last thing that I expected was to get stuck here. Malcolm: So I guess your powers cant get us out then, huh? Prue: No. I cant just lift us from another world. So, if were gonna get out were gonna have to work together. Just let me help you. I wont turn you into a toad. I promise. Thank you. May I? (She looks at his wound.) Doesnt look too bad. At least the bleeding is... Malcolm: Ouch! Prue: So, why do you hate witches so much. Malcolm: Its how I got trapped in here. The artist that painted this was a witch. She was my girlfriend. Prue: You dated a witch? Malcolm: What, youve never dated a mortal? Prue: Huh, I wonder... Malcolm: Ow! Prue: Ah, sorry. Go on! Malcolm: Fine. Nell and I... we broke up. She wrote a curse in Latin. Prue: To free what is lost. Malcolm: Right. And she painted the castle over it, made sure I got the painting. It was the only way she could trick me and trap me inside. It worked. Prue: So how did you see the underwriting? Malcolm: Same way as you, probably? Prue: X-Ray... you must have really of pissed Nell off. Malcolm: Well, that would explain why I havent aged since I got here and the fireballs. Prue: How long have you been running from them? Malcolm: What year is it? Prue: 1999. Malcolm: Its been 70 years. Prue: Oh, wait a second. Youve been stuck here trying to get help for 70 years. Malcolm: Its not the typical life of an art historian, isnt it? Prue: Well, I wont be here that long. I mean, I have 2 sisters and we all have powers. If anybody can find a way out, its us.[Scene: P3. Phoebe is there with Dan.]
Phoebe: Dan, sorry to keep you waitingDan: I didnt realize you were late.
Phoebe: Oh, 11 minutes, 23.4 seconds to be exact. Those the code violations?Dan: That and the D.B.I.s book of minimum safety requirements.
Phoebe: Ok, then were all set. I think youll find me pretty knowledgeable about all areas of construction.Dan: What about Piper?
Phoebe: Oh, something came up. She cant be here. Sorry buddy.Dan: Oh.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Bucklands. Piper walks in Prue's office.]
Piper: Prue? (She sees Prues purse and then the X-ray.) Absolvo Amitto Amplus Brevis.(Joe enters.)
Joe: Oh, hey Piper. Joe Lyons. We met at a wine auction a few months ago. Piper: Oh... Joe: Uh, Prue around? Piper: Uh, shes... shes somewhere. Joe: Ah, I wont get in your way. I just need to pick up the painting Piper: Oh, forgive me, Joe. Joe: For what?(She freezes him.)
Piper: For that.[Cut to the castle.]
Malcolm: Thats your plan? Are you outta your mind?Prue: My sisters are gonna realize Im missing, soon. I have to let them know where I am and warn them.
Malcolm: Its too dangerous. Youll die. Prue: I dont have any another choice. Alright, my sisters could make the same mistake I did and get suck into the painting. Ok, corner, now. Malcolm: And how will seeing your name... Prue: And the name Nell.. Malcolm: Yes, written on a window, prevent that from happening? Prue: Ok, because my sisters will think that its a clue, so theyll look up the name Nell in our Book of Shadows and hopefully theyll find a solution. Are you ready? Go! Ok, tell me how you write HELP on the window without getting creamed by the fireball Malcolm: You mean you dont know how youre gonna do it? Prue: Youre the expert Malcolm: Are you crazy? It took me years to get those messages written on the window. Ive got the scars to prove it. What about your powers? Prue: All right, fine. Ill deflect the fireballs. You write the names Malcolm: Be careful near the window Prue: Why? Whats wrong with the window? (We see Piper carrying the painting and the castle starts to shake.) Oh, okay... whats happening? Malcolm: The painting. Its being moved. And its moving fast. Get back to the chamber. Prue: No way. Im going to that window. Malcolm: Its too dangerous. We gotta to get out of here.[Cut to Piper. She's carrying the painting to the elevator.]
Piper: Hold the elevator, please.[Cut to the castle. Prue and Malcolm hide under a table.]
Prue: I really just wanted to get my name and Nells on that window. Malcolm: And you can, as soon as the painting stops moving. Just stay low.(Malcolm stares at her.)
Prue: What? Malcolm: Nothing. I was... never mind. Prue: No, what? Malcolm: I always hoped someone would get my SOS. I just never thought it would be a woman. Prue: What, a woman cant rescue a man? Malcolm: Im still waiting. Prue: Yeah, well, keep waiting, pal. Bookcase!!!(They run into the bookcase.)
[Scene: Manor. Phoebe is watching TV and is on the phone.]
Phoebe: Hello, this is Phoebe Halliwell. Id like to set up an appointment to return my aptitude test. (Piper comes in.) By 5 tomorrow? Great. Bye (to Piper) Oh, Piper. Good news. I spoke Dan. He will have your estimate ready by tomorrow. Piper: We got bigger problems than code violations Phoebe: Prue wasnt at Bucklands? Piper: No, but it was clearly the last place she was before she disappeared. I take it you havent heard from her? Phoebe: Not a word. Okay, now Im worried. Piper: Check out this X-Ray. I found at her office. I think it may have something to do with her disappearing. (Phoebe is looking at the TV Show) We dont have a lot of time, either. It wont be long before everyone at Bucklands realizes that shes gone and the painting is gone. Phoebe: Oh, the final match.Tv Host: Primarily concerned with blood and blood-forming organs.
Phoebe: Hematology.Guy: Hematology
Tv Host: Yes. Oona Chaplin, the wife of Charles Chaplin, was the daughter of what famous?
Phoebe: Eugene ONeil.Tv Host: American playwright.
Guy: ONeil.
Tv Host: What country now occupies the Peninsula once known as Asia Minor?
Phoebe: Turkey.Guy: Uh... Turkey.
(Piper turns the TV off.)
Piper: How is that you know all the answers? Phoebe: What? I could know about medicine, Americans playwrights and that Asia Minor is now called Turkey. Piper: No, you couldnt... you have cast a spell, havent you? Phoebe: I wanted to be able to get Prues car fixed and this job was the only way that I could do it. Piper: Phoebe, what kind of spell? Phoebe: All I had to do was ace an aptitude test which, by the way, Im sure I have. Piper: Phoebe? Phoebe: Okay. Its a smart spell. And before you freak out, its out temporary. Itll be over by 7 oclock tonight. Piper: It doesnt matter when it ends. Were not allowed to cast personal gain spells. You know that. Phoebe: Yeah. I do know that. But its not. I even put that in myself. "no personal gain". Piper: There will be consequences. There always are. Phoebe: I dont care. Its worth it. Piper you were not at that job interview surrounded by those college graduates. You dont know how good it feels to be really smart. Smart people are respected, taken seriously. And really smart women? Forget about it! Then again, you probably do know what Im talking about. You have a 4-years degree. Piper: So, what? Phoebe, I will never have the kind of smarts you have no matters what I do. But you... you can go back to collage. Say you did get this job. What would happen to it the moment your smart spell ended? Phoebe: I thought Id worry about that later.(Phoebes going upstairs.)
Piper: Wait. What does this mean? "Absolvo Amitto Amplus Brevis Semper Mea". (She starts to get sucked into the painting.) Phoebe. Help! Phoebe: Piper, no! Piper: Phoebeeeee. Phoebe: Piper???[Cut to the castle.]
Piper: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!(A fireball flies past her.)
Prue: Piper? Piper: What the hell is happening? Where are we? Prue: All right, hurry. Just get to the bookcase fast. Piper: Whahhhhhhh!!! Prue: Watch out. Piper: Uhh!! (Piper freezes a fireball) Whoa!!! Whoa!!! Wow!!!(They run into the bookcase)
Malcolm: Dont tell me shes the sister witch who was gonna save us.Commercial Break
[Scene: In the castle.]
Piper: I dont want to live forever. I dont want to spend the rest of my time trapped in a painting, hanging on some wall, wearing a broken shoe.
Prue: Well, neither do I but there is a solution.
Piper: You call that a solution? Braving endless fireballs to get a message to Phoebe?
Prue: Okay, so, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure out that the situation is pretty bad.
Piper: No. But it may just take a rocket scientist to get us out of here. Phoebe.
Malcolm: Another witch sister?
Piper: Not any witch. A super witch. Shes a genius.
Prue: Piper, I dont really think that youre helping the situation.
Piper: No, I mean it. Shes a walking brain trust. An Einstein with cleavage. She cast a spell on herself, Prue. A smart spell.
Prue: What?
Malcolm: Can she save us?
Piper: Forget the details, Prue. Just know that if anybody can get us out of here, its Phoebe. We need to get back to that living room, get Nells name on the window...
Prue: Piper, wait.
Piper: No no no no no. We cant wait. Its only temporary. The spell ends at 7 tonight.
Prue: Ooh!
[Scene: Manor. 6:15pm. Phoebe carry's the Book of Shadows downstairs.]
Phoebe: Come on. Come on. Theres got to be something. (Doorbell rings) Who is it?
Jenny: Its Jenny.
Phoebe: Uh ... unless its a huge 911, sweetie, youre gonna have to come back later.
(Doorbell rings again and Phoebe hides the book.)
[Scene: Castle.]
Piper: If we get out of here alive, you own me a new pair of shoes.
Prue: If we get out of here alive, Ill buy you a purse to match. Piper, left.
(Piper freezes a fireball.)
Piper: Forget the shoes. The next time you get a supernatural SOS.
Prue: Ill take your advice and just ignore it.
Malcolm: Be careful near the window.
Prue: Whats wrong with the window?
(Some blades appear when Piper get closer the window.)
Piper: Wha!!! Whaaa! Blades!
Prue: Are you okay?
Piper: Uh, for now. But I cant reach the window because if I lean forward, Im sliced and diced.
(Prue used her power to let Piper reaches the window)
Prue: Okay, Piper. Hurry! (Piper is writing NELL on the window.) Dont forget to write her name backwards. So Phoebe can read from outside. Come on.
(Prue moves a frozen fireball in front of the window.)
Piper: Good thing she had a short name. (They run into the bookcase.) Lets go, lets go, lets go.
[Cut to the manor.]
Phoebe: The human reproductive system? Wait, and your uncle wanted Piper to help you out with this?
Jenny: Yeah, but I was too embarrassed to tell him I already know about sex. So I figure we can just hang out and watch some television. (Jenny sees the light on the painting.) Hey, whats that?
Phoebe: Uh, Jenny, will you go in there and grab me a pen, please? (She does so. Phoebe gets a magnifying glass and looks at the painting.) Nell?
(Jenny comes back in.)
Jenny: Is something wrong?
Phoebe: Uh, Im not sure (writing something) okay. The 23 chromosomes that make up the human genome system within the cell ... (Jenny looks at her.) Its too complicated. (She starts to draw something.) Okey-Dokey. Youre all set.
Jenny: But ...
Phoebe: Bye Jenny. (Jenny leaves. Phoebe holds her hands above the book and the pages turn by themselves.) Nell, Nell, find me Nell. Whoa! I am one super smart witch. Okay, what do we have here? Latin. "In the 1920s a witch named Nell tricked a powerful warlock into a painting with a hidden spell that only his power of X-Ray vision could see.". ok, Im getting tired of talking to myself. How do I get my sisters out? Oh! "VERVA OMNES LIBERANT". Words free us all. "These words will free anyone trapped inside the painting" okay. But how do I get the words inside without getting trapped inside the painting MYSELF?
(She sees kit.)
Kit: Meow.
Phoebe: No, I couldnt.
[Cut to the castle.]
Prue: So, maybe we should take shifts waiting for Phoebe outside the bookcase. I mean, weve been pretty safe there so far.
Malcolm: Ill take the first shift.
Prue: I had a feeling you would.
(Malcolm leaves the bookcase)
Piper: What? What is it? Whats wrong?
Prue: Ive been thinking about that witch who cursed Malcolm into the painting. It takes a lot of time and a high level of magic to create this world. Seems like an awfully big spell just to get revenge over a bad breakup.
Piper: I agree.
Prue: And it was almost impossible for us, the Charmed Ones no less, to get that message on the window. Yet Malcolm, an art historian with absolutely no powers, who was able to escape fireballs and those blades, to get his message on the window. I mean, I dont know Piper. Its just... something weird about all of this.
(They hear a noise and a cat.)
Malcolm: Here kitty kitty. (Kit hisses at him.) Here kitty kitty. What do we have here?
(He sees the message on Kits collar.)
Piper: It is Kit.
Prue: What is she doing here?
Piper: Prue, look.
Malcolm: "VERVA OMNES"...
Prue: Piper, freeze him.
(She tries to freeze him but he blinks before she could.)
Malcolm: Youre too late. But you were right. Your sister Phoebes one smart witch. Blinking allow me to be one place, one moment, and another the next
Prue: Piper, look out
(Piper freezes a fireball.)
Malcolm: "LIBERANT"
(He disappears)
Prue: I thought he was an innocent. I thought he needed help.
Piper: Im not talking to you... forever
[Cut to the manor. Malcolm appears in living room.]
Malcolm: Thanks for freeing me, witch. 70 years is a long time
Phoebe: 70 years? Youre a warlock, arent you?
Malcolm: Your sisters were right . you are a smart witch.
Phoebe: Where are they?
Malcolm: With the cat. The one with no collar. That was interesting... that was smart. Too smart for your own good.
Phoebe: So, that woman who brought Prue the painting... shes a warlock too?
Malcolm: Janes my lover. Shes been trying to get me out for years. She needed to find the Charmed Ones, you. It took her 70 years to do that.
Phoebe: We havent been around that long.
(she kicks him)
Phoebe: I read "jeet-kune-do" manual earlier today. I think that makes me a black belt. (he blinks and appears behind her... she kicks him again) Actually, make that a seventh degree black belt. Im a master.
Malcolm: Not for long. Youre not. Well see how powerful you are, how smart you are when your spell ends at 7.
Phoebe: How do you know about that?
Malcolm: Tick Tock, Phoebe. Tick Tock.
(He blinks and appears outside the house. Then meets Jane.)
Jane or Miss Franklin: Malcolm.
Malcolm: Jane.
(They kiss.)
Jane: I thought Id never seen you again. Come on. Lets get out of here.
Malcolm: Not yet. Not yet. I have a little present for you.
Jane: Oh, you do? Where is it?
Malcolm: Its inside the house... Something youve always wanted.
Jane: And what would that be?
Malcolm: The power of Premonition.
Jane: And what would you get?
Malcolm: Revenge... and 2 more powers.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Castle.]
Prue: Even if Phoebe is alive, she may not be for long.
Phoebe: Maybe she can figure out a way to save herself before he finds her.
Prue: Yeah, well, she better do it quick, its almost 7. Although if anybody can do it, Phoebe can.
Piper: Yeah, even without the smart spell. I mean, putting that message on Kits collar, thats very Phoebe. I wouldve never thought of it.
Prue: Neither would I. It was a great plan.
Piper: If we get out of here, Im gonna buy here a new pair of shoes.
Prue: Ill buy her a purse to match.
[Cut to the manor.]
Phoebe: The spell... 3 words in Latin... the question is... which 3?
(7 oclock)
Phoebe: Oh, no. (She holds her hands above the book but the pages won't flip.) Come on come on... theyre on the tip of my tongue. Uh ... "Verve omnes" something... "Verve omnes.... liber... liber... liberace!" No, it cant be liberace ... (She finds the page.) Oh, oh no. Its in Latin... the spell is over and I dont understand Latin anymore.
(Malcolm blinks inside the house.)
Malcolm: I told you Id be back.
(He opens the door for Jane.)
Jane: Hello, Phoebe. Say goodbye to your family.
(Jane strikes a match and sets the painting on fire.)
Phoebe: No! ABSOLVO AMITTO AMPLUS BREVIS.
Malcolm: The curse.
Phoebe: SEMPER ME.
(The three of them get sucked into the painting.)
[Castle.]
Piper: The house is on fire?
Prue: Not the house, the painting... its gotta be Malcolms doing. He must be at the Manor
(Phoebe appears.)
Piper: Phoebe, youre alive!!!!
Phoebe: Yeah. Lets keep it that way.
(Malcolm and Jane appears.)
Prue: Malcolm ... and Jane.
Phoebe: Shes a warlock.
Malcolm: Stupid witch. Now you and your sisters are gonna end up burning to death.
Phoebe: Looking for this? (about the collar) Freeze them.
(Piper freezes them.)
Phoebe: Wheres Kit?
Prue: Uh ...
Piper: There she is. There she is.
Prue: I cant believe we almost forgot her.
Phoebe: VERVE OMNES LIBERANT.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Manor. They're putting out the fire with the fire extinguisher.]
Prue: You know, I didnt want them to die. I just wanted them trapped in that house forever.
Phoebe: Bright side? You wont have to worry about any complaints from the owner of the painting.
Piper: And youll never have to worry about anyone else getting a supernatural mayday from it.
Phoebe:: Yeah, well, thanks for getting ours, Phoebe.
(They look at each other.)
Piper: Hey, how did you get the collar from Malcolm?
Phoebe: Oh, I used the very complex, very different kind of smarts.
Prue: You picked his pocket.
Phoebe: I picked his pocket.
Piper: Phoebe!!!
Phoebe: What, he was a warlock... smartest thing Ive ever done.
[Scene: P3.]
Piper: "A new heating and cooling system, retrofitting, imported prestressed I-Beams, architectural flooring". Your estimate requires a $¼ million and a crew of 75. I gotta tell you, Dan. Im not feeling real guilty about not helping Jenny with that paper.
Dan: Well, actually, those were Phoebes suggestions.
Piper: Phoebe?! Hah! Can you fix it cheap and fix it quick?
Dan: In a couple of days, sure.
Piper: Great. Youre hired. You can take that with you (about the estimate)
(we see Phoebe and Prue talking... Dan comes there)
Dan: Hey Prue.
Prue: Hi.
Dan: Phoebe...
Phoebe: Hey.
Dan: You got a minute?
Phoebe: Uh, yeah!. Is it about Piper?
Dan: No, its actually about Jennys paper
Phoebe: You know, I wasnt really myself that day. Is there a problem?
(Dan hands Phoebe the paper.)
Dan: No, its not due till Friday. But I really appreciate your help...I think.
Phoebe: Uh... Yeah, okay.
(She hides the paper)
Dan: Id really appreciate if Jenny could do her own work in her handwriting using her own smarts... if you know what I mean.
Phoebe: I certainly do! (He laughs and leaves.) All right... (to Prue) You dont wanna know.
Prue: Uh huh!
Phoebe: You know, this whole smart spell thing, it really just made me realize that theres a lot of cool information out there.
Prue: I agree.
Phoebe: And who knows? Maybe Ill go back to college, take some night classes. Im a smart girl, Ill figure it out.
Prue: Yes, you will. Just dont lose that common sense. We may need it to save the day again.
(Piper comes in.)
Piper: What are we talking about?
Phoebe: Right now, the job that I will not be getting.
(She rips up the aptitude test.)
Piper: Smart move, Pheebs. Now, open your present.
Phoebe: Oh!! Wait... you guys got me shoes and a purse?
Prue: Very smart looking, wouldnt say, Piper?
Piper: Pure genius, Prue.
Phoebe: Enough with that already.
(Prue grabs Jennys paper.)
Prue: Okay, you wanna explain this?
Phoebe: Okay.. Well, thats Piper
Prue: Ooh, sure!
Phoebe: And thats Dan.
Prue: I see!!!
Piper: Thats not funny.
End