Sometimes we need to walk our lonely roads, firmly gripping our baggage until the sun sets. The light of morning will herald our change as we walk away without them. Sun rises and sets are sighs. I know walking in rest will only last briefly as I watch my shadow walking with me. There's always something. But now I know at least...thats the way life is! When we have surrendered all of ourselves hidden from the light we will become stars. More massive expansions of self, lasting long after our bodies have retired. Expansions into bliss, into love. Into God. Just recently I have seen the sunset. My life is not going well right now! Like a glowing ember, pain glowed, pulsating, living off the life of my heart. I got fired from my job, break - up, nothings going my way. I started to meditate not because it was fun, but out of necessity! For sanities sake. Welcoming the velvety black silent peace without depth as I closed my eyes I declared "I give up! I surrender! I'm as good as dead now" When I got up, I droned my way to my bed hoping I would be taken to heaven in my sleep. I closed my eyes. Restlessness pulled my leg to the side and I turned over. I opened my eyes. Glaring at me in neon green right in front of me were the numbers "11:11" on my alarm clock. "Ok" I said. Now these numbers have been chasing me every where for some time now. Some research on 11:11 on google will tell you that 11:11 overall means a new beginning. From my experience it means brace yourself, things are going to hit the fan. A beginning needs an end. What this told me was, 1 - God is in control. SOMETHING made me move. It wasn't me, I wasn't thinking. It was pure instinct. OR was it? If God is in control of my most minute movements, cloaked with such finesse that I was fooled into thinking it was ME then it is more than possible that God is in control of everything. All movement. 11:11 meant..."Don't worry...I'm in control. This is all for a reason." 2 - It said to "keep going. There is a reason. There is more to reality. And your about to find out." Night leads to morning. I will emerge out of this a new, better person. Those who are not having such a good time right now...your not alone! Don't worry God is in control. All pain leads to wisdom. All wisdom leads to love and all love leads to God. God is peace, wholeness, where we will all find each other in the end. Hang in there! NAMASTE