Hi! I'm CAT-

Good!! You stayed!!

I am a surviver of childhood sexual abuse. I do not plan to get too explicit here, I'd like to keep as close to a "G" rating as possible... But I wanted to let people know... Childhood sexual abuse is NOT as uncommon as people think.

Since beginning to talk about my past, I've trusted very few people enough to speak to them directly... because for the most part my family still does not know... But of the people I've spoken too... too many have similar dirty secrets hidden in their past.

-- My best friend.. abused by her brother.

-- Another friend.. she would not tell me who by.

-- My husband's Sisters.. abused by their fathers friend.

** See Addition below...

-- My Father.. maybe.. I have not spoken with HIM. you'll see why later... but rumors are he was abused by HIS father.

What I hope to accomplish with this web-site, is to show other abuse survivers they are not alone... and to have parents take a good long look at their spouses, freinds, babysitters, etcetera relationship with their child. Even if abuse has already occurred... 'sooner stopped, sooner mended'.

My abuse started too early to remember my age.. my guess.. 3 or 4.. and lasted until my late teens when I finally managed to put a stop to it. My abuser was my father, and I never told anyone until recently... my husband, [I told him on our first date... I'd already known him for a while, and the last guy I'd told anything too, had run like a scared rabbit... I did not want to get attatched before he ran if he was going too... glad he didn't :)] and finally just over a year ago, my mother.... I told her that I would leave the ball in her court as to if I would confront my father, or tell anyone else... unfortunately she has rationalized it to herself "he was abused as a child.. maybe even sexually.. theres no reason to rock the boat now that it's over" I have told my mother, that whatever her decision, I would never again love my father, I would seldom visit when he is home, and my children when I have them, will NEVER be alone with him... my husband seconds and thirds that.... :)

UPDATE: I now have had a child, and my mother found out that I meant it. She was very hurt.. but stays with my father.

To show you how sexual abuse can be hidden, here is my only slightly editted public biography.. this is how I present myself to the world... Clean.. without the dirty little secrets...

My Public Face

Find out what's happening with me now at:
I2shy2day's Blog

** Unfortunately childhood abuse, whether Sexual, or not.. can have many lasting effects. One of my husbands sisters is now beyond any further sufferring... See her story HERE

Here are a few links to abuse survivor clubs, to help get you started on your recovery if you have been abused... I will post more later.

http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/healingfromchildsexualabuse.

http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/nomoresecrets.

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Thanks for visiting, hope you enjoyed the stay!

Please come back soon, and pardon the mess... this page is very rough right now... I'm throwing it together in about the space of an hour, while my husband is gone... I'll add onto it off and on as time allows...

7-02-2004 : As you may have noticed.. time has not allowed much.. :) I have so much else going on in my life, (including a new child, due march 2005) and have to work on this when my husband is not at home... However, I still would like this page to grow.
If you have a story you would like to tell (remember.. keeping it 'G' rated, and not too graphic.. I want this site to be viewable by all ages) Submit it to me.. :
and I will make time to add it to the site.

6-6-2006 (EVIIL!!! ;) ) I've added a blog-
I2shy2day's Blog
I have trouble having time to edit this page, made tougher by new child, but I will try to add new blog entries semi-monthly, and I will also try to keep checking my i2shy2day email account, so it isn't deactivated again. I apologize if you've ever mailed me, and had that mail returned.

Let me know if you find anything useful to you in this site.
Thank-you.

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