Stress can be defined as the pressure you feel when your body reacts to a threat or challenge. Starting a new job, giving a speech, and taking a test are some things that may cause stress. Balancing work, relationships, family, and friends can prove to be extremely overwhelming for some people.

Stress can affect a person’s physical, emotional or mental health. People who are stressed may have difficulty sleeping, have high blood pressure or ulcers, feel tired, or suffer with headaches. They may also feel angry, irritable, have mood swings, be forgetful, or have a difficult time concentrating. It is important to understand though that not all stress is bad. Sometimes stress can add to your life, make your life exciting, help you perform, or give you the physical and mental strength needed to survive a serious incident. Many people do their best work when they are under stress, and once the stressful situation is gone, they can appreciate the feelings of accomplishment and relaxation that will follow.

Without stress, we would not be human. The important thing to look at is how stress affects you personally, and how you deal with your stress. Stress does not have to control you, take over, or be a negative force in your life! You can learn to manage your stress in a positive way.

One of the most significant problems human beings face is how to handle stress. You may not always be able to make stress disappear, but you can manage it with some very simple techniques.

Talk! Don't hold all your feelings within! Discuss your stressful feelings with someone you trust who will listen without being judgmental or pressuring you to their own point of view. Even if you can't change the immediate situation, talking about it helps alleviate some of the tension you may be feeling. Supplement the verbalizing with something physical: write it out, exercise or hit a pillow.

ACT! Be willing to take risk and make change, no matter how small. Try to change the stressful situation, or at least some part of it. Moving forward in small ways helps you feel empowered and in control. Put one foot in front of the other to move in a positive direction. Soon, the stress will lessen.

LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! If you learn about how your body reacts to stress, you can also learn how to counter that stress. Learn to listen to your body's signals and find ways to reduce your stress, even if it's just "taking five" to clear your mind. Relaxation exercises (E.g. Yoga, meditation, physical exercise) help, too.

BE IN CHARGE! Discover what you need to feel good about yourself and get your needs met. Another way to reduce your stress is to find an interest, hobby or activity where you feel in charge and call the shots. If you really feel out of control, don't stay silent and alone! Seek guidance from someone who is qualified to help you get through the obstacles, and move forward again. If you can't find someone qualified in your neighborhood or you don't feel as though you can talk to someone "in person" try a qualified internet counselor.

DON'T OVERWHELM YOURSELF: If you are stressed and overwhelmed, perhaps you are trying to handle too much. Rid yourself of extra duties that aren't necessary or important. Learn how to delegate and how to say "no" without feeling guilty. Ask for help if you need it.

GET AWAY: Sometimes a change, however small, can do wonders for your spirit. Forget it all for a while--escape! Go somewhere new for a few hours, or a few days if you can afford to. If not, it may be helpful just to "get away" to a warm bath for a little while!

PRIORITIZE: You may not be able to avoid all the responsibilities obligations you currently have, but you can learn how to complete them without resentment and consciously choose how you will handle them.

EXTEND YOURSELF: Make your own life better by making someone else's life better. Give of yourself. Volunteer! You will feel empowered, positive, important. Hope, Inc. offers volunteer opportunities for individuals and groups. Volunteer positions are available in all of our programs and we offer training to our Volunteers. However, volunteering at a domestic violence shelter requires time, empathy and knowledge about the issue of violence in the home. If you would like to volunteer but would prefer to check out other volunteer options, visit http://www.volunteermatch.com and choose an organization that you feel is right for you!

MAKE SUCCESS HAPPEN! If you can't change the world, change yourself! Learn how to love yourself as you are, while you work towards your goals. Then, make a commitment to yourself to start improving the things about yourself and your life that (you believe) need it. Instead of immediate, dramatic change, learn to enjoy the journey of lifelong self-improvement. You are always a work in progress.

SOCIALIZE: Spend time with family and friends for love and support. Don't be afraid to enjoy yourself! Appreciate friendship and let others know you care about them, too. Love may not conquer all, but it's a great start!

LEARN HOW TO BE HAPPY: One thing all of life's winners have in common is a sense of well-being, a positive attitude, and realistic goals. Focus on the good things about yourself, and in your life. Nobody's perfect. Learn to enjoy the "little things" that make you happy. Count your blessings. Every day, write down on a slip of paper one thing you are grateful for, even if it's just a sunny day, a friend's phone call, your cat's happy purr. Put this "blessing" in a jar along with a dollar or more. Do this for one month. At the end of the month read all those slips of paper and you will realize that life is better than you think! Use the money to do something really special for yourself, or donate it to charity.

• They use drugs

• They use alcohol

• They smoke

• They become physically or verbally abusive

• They isolate themselves

• They become depressed or suicidal

• They ignore the stressful feelings

• They cry uncontrollably

• They lash out at others (yell, start fights, or use sarcasm)

What is Involved and How You Can Get Started

There may be an initial cost to learn the techniques. Once you become trained it will be up to you to set up a regular practice time each day. Doing this schedule will be good practice for time management in other parts of your life. Even when you feel you are progressing and are less reactive to stressful situations you still need to keep a daily schedule to keep your mind, body, and spirit charged with optimism and positive thoughts Managing your time more effectively or seeking counseling to resolve more chronic stress related problems will assist greatly with a relaxation response on a daily basis.

Learning to take "time-out" takes practice on this busy world but illness, fatigue, agitation, and heightened conflict are all less attractive alternatives.

If you feel you are stressed or that you handle your stress in an unhealthy way, try one or more of the following techniques to help manage your stress in a more positive way.

Deep Breathing: Inhale through your nose slowly, counting silently to five, then exhale through your mouth slowly, counting silently to five.

Positive Affirmations: Say positive messages out loud to yourself. Positive affirmations could include: “Everything will work out”, “I will get a new job”, “I will pass this test”, “I know I can do it”.

Stretching: Stretch the area where you feel tension, holding for about 30 seconds, relax, and repeat 35 times.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Tense a muscle (like making a fist) and hold it for a slow, silent count of 30 seconds , then release the muscle for a slow, silent count of 30 seconds.

Visualization: Find a quiet space, get comfortable, close your eyes, and try to imagine yourself in a calm, enjoyable, relaxing, tranquil setting. Think about the details of your tranquil setting. Who is with you? Is it warm? How does the sun feel? Is there a fragrance in the air? This is a way to take a mini-vacation.

Clearing Your Mind: Find a quiet space, get comfortable, close your eyes, and begin breathing deeply. As you do this, focus on one thought or image only. Try this for at least 10 minutes a day.

Talk To Someone: Find a friend, family member or best of all, a counselor to talk to. A counselor can help you with the above techniques, assist you with managing your time more effectively, help you to express your fears and concerns, and work with you on building your self esteem and confidence.

Go through the following list and ask yourself, “Does this cause me stress?” If so, you may want to see a counselor to discuss the best ways for you to handle your stress in a positive way!

• Looking for a job

• Starting a new job

• People at work

• Money problems

• Your children

• Getting a divorce

• Moving to a new home

• The sickness or death of a loved one

• Your siblings

• Your current living conditions

• Your friends

• Your spouse

• Your parents

• Attending social events

• Traffic or commuting

• Meeting new people

• Legal issues

• Giving a speech or presentation