Eight Degrees of Marital Happiness

Many think marriage has only two extremes

total happiness or total misery with nothing in between

I beg to differ, marital happiness has 8 elements on a scale

If you got all 8 of them, you have hit on the head of a nail

The first and lowest degree of marital happiness is called Animal Love

Debauchers and depraved enjoy no other happiness but this physical love

Animal love is a degree higher than the happiness of the brutes

Brutes who lived in caves and survived on hunted meat and fruits

The second degree of marital happiness consists of compatibility in manners

Mutual politeness between married people with animal love on the scanners

They still may have disputes but the reconciliation door is kept open

Manner will soften these disputes but civility would still be token

The third degree of marital happiness consists in compatibility of Opinion

The more couples think alike on all subjects the more solid is the union

Less danger of squabbles & disputes if their opinions coincide

Contrary opinions will create between them a continental divide

The fourth degree of marital happiness is the compatibility of Taste

This is perception of what is proper, beautiful, sublime in physical state

This is very important as it also includes art, building & furniture

Gardening, books of entertainment and any man-made structure

The fifth degree of marital happiness is compatibility of sentiments

This is the perception of what is right and wrong in the moral elements

This is particularly important in marriage if the children are involved

Couples will be more obstinate in their opinions; this won’t easily be resolved

The sixth degree of marital happiness is compatibility in Understanding

This forms an exalted source of happiness if not withstanding

This includes equality of capacity to perceive and relish the truth

In morals, politics, philosophy & religion to give matrimony a boost

The seventh degree of marital happiness is compatibility of Tempers

This excludes anger, resentment and peevishness in all matters

It supposes the most perfect uniformity in the wills of the married people

Leading them to just, benevolent and charitable actions, always congenial

All degrees put together can not supply the want of compatibility of tempers

If any suffering in the world can entitle one to the heaven’s laughters

It would be to pass through life tied to a companion

Full of anger, resentment, weak head and bad disposition.

The eighth and highest degree of marital happiness is compatibility in religion

This includes sameness of ideas of Allah’s attributes & perfection

With wills and affections and actions mutually tending towards honor of the deity

And advancement of the soul is heightened by the sameness in a mode of worship & piety

The happiness of matrimony is proportional to the degrees present on this scale

Some have progression and some retrogression as time passes as you inhale

Due to new situation, connection, force or conviction of superiority

Or in sentiments, temper, taste, understanding or changes in priority

Marrying for looks, money, connections or security is now more in fashion

To stay married for a long time, to these eight degrees you must pay close attention

And you must marry with Maola’s raza mubarak  & blessings within our own religion

May Allah bless our Maola with sehat and long life, and may we all live under his protection

Abd-e-Syedna, TUS – Shk. Husain Jamali, Anjuma-e-Burhani, Los Angeles, CA