Broken: Part One “It’s Like This…”

By: Hikari

4/17/00

E-mail to: elvina99@hotmail.com

Notes: Nothing. I’m going to scare you.

Disclaimers: YYH belongs to the guy who married the creator of Sailor Moon- and no, I’m not LYING. (practically died choking when I found out). If any information is incorrect in the fic, please tell me- I haven’t seen the series *sniff* *sniff*.

*****

Kurama swept the glass into the trashcan, and unscrewed the full-length mirror from the wall. He didn’t ask me why I broke it, just gave me his usual forgiving smile. Hell, he even bandaged my ripped arm and gave me a towel to hide my nudity. The tissue on my forearm was torn in three places, and ten punctures were scattered throughout. Damn… I really did it this time. The last incident of blood I somehow brought upon myself- involved a tub and lots of hot water. I won’t explain any further. Lately, I guess I’ve been slipping. What am I thinking? I AM slipping. It’s been more than a year since I’ve had a mission, and Mukuro gave me her consent in letting me stay in Ningenkai for a while. I shouldn’t have left. I only bring trouble to those I have known to be my friends. Especially Kurama. He never gave-up caring though. He always asked why I do what I do- hurting myself.

The door suddenly closes shut. He must have taken the mirror outside to throw the miserable thing away. Hn. I’m being selfish again. I can’t help it though. The idiot just proposed to Yukina, Kurama is in what those ningens call college; same with Yusuke and Keiko, and even Shizuru got married and opened several hair salon chains. It’s strange. Everyone has moved on… except for me. I’ve found that working and training for Mukuro to only be a means of drying out the time that’s left in my life. Yes, I’ve reached my peak in power, and I’m still rising too. I’m Mukuro’s highest general and heir to the throne. My sister is found, the tear gem has been retrieved- what could possibly be missing?

“You’ve been drinking again, haven’t you?”

He’s back. “I happen to like sake.”

“But everyday?” Kurama moved to his night chair where my cloak hung. His hands wandered around and searched in the many hidden folds. Pulling his arm out, he holds a metal canister. Unscrewing the lid, he inhales and winces at the intensity of alcohol. “You do realize that something this potent can kill someone like Yusuke…”

“It’s just liquor.”

Sighing, Kurama went to the basin in his dorm to dump the volatile liquid. Doesn’t matter, he knows I always get more. “Hiei…”

“What?”

“What happened to you? Your skin is practically yellow, you don’t eat, you don’t sleep… all you do is self-loath.”

I don’t know how to answer that.

“Don’t you care anymore?”

I don’t know how to answer that one either.

“Don’t you have values anymore?”

I thought I did.

“Aren’t you going to answer me?”

“I’m not living…”

“Nani?” My friend blinks.

“Nothing. I said nothing.”