Review: Lord of the Rings is eco-terrorist propaganda
One major job of the Bush Youth is to document liberal bias in the media. And what can be more biased than the Lord of the Rings?
It takes place in some early age unmentioned in the bible, when now-extinct species like elves supposedly existed. So why has nobody every found any fossilized elves? Sounds awfully framiliar to the supposedly extinct "Dodo"
bird, which has probably not been seen because a) the agenda oriented scientific community made it all up in the first place, or b) the scientists are too lazy to keep track
of the Dodo. I suspect the latter because last time I was in a city there were birds leaving "dodo" all over the place.
The point of the series is that a "hobbit" inherits a golden ring is corrupting people with its power. This is typical class-warfare supporting the death tax - not just any tax, but the evil death tax. Of course money does not corrupt people. Only food stamps do that.
Like the Smurfs (who have thankfully been banned in decent places) hobbits live in a communist utopia with no leaders or corporations. Hobbits always give "gifts" to each other (ie, welfare) and are fat, just like the way feminazis would like women to be.
The hobbits are also pro-gun-control propaganda, because dispite having no weapons they do not all kill each other.
One of the hobbits first adventures is to meet a homosexual named "Tom Bombadil" who does all of the cooking and cleaning for a feminist. Thanks to our extensive lobbying, Tom Bom did not appear in the film version.
More feminazism abounds as the gaggle of communists come to an Elf-city of tree-sitters run by a woman. While everything else in the world is falling apart, the one place run by a woman
supposedly keeps on track? Yeah right. America has never been run by a woman, though Red Canada has.
It is not surprising that the inspiration for the Lord of the Rings came from pagan epics - and it is not surpriseing that decent, hard working christians burned everything pagan. The Lord of the Ring should be burned along with Harry Potter.
Attention Children of America
Contact: Marshall Field, Diversified Public Relations Solutions, Inc.
As you are all probably aware, the American Tobacco Industry is in trouble. This is Clinton's fault: Not only did his federal government placed unfair restrictions on tobacco advertising, but court decisions under Clinton also crippled the American Tobacco Industry.
As result of these troubling events, Diversified Public Relations Solutions Inc. believes the American Tobacco Industry may soon resort to a drastic series of employee layoffs. If this were to happen, millions of mothers and fathers could find themselves out of work and on the streets. DSI urges you to think twice about these recent events, because such a tragic turn would hurt millions of innocent American children -- the sons and daughters of the employees of the American Tobacco Industry.
Imagine it: the children of American Tobacco Industry employees would immediately be without proper clothing, nutritional meals, adequate shelter, and worst of all, they would no longer be covered under their parents' insurance plans, since such plans would no longer be in place because their parents would no longer have jobs.
With that in mind, DSI believes it has become necessary for these at-risk children to, now, help their parents by taking up the habit of smoking cigarettes. It is the opinion of DSI that not enough is being done to inform America's youth about the benefits of cigarette smoking -- as well as the impact that a smoking recession would have on our economy and, more importantly, on their own lives.
Some of the benefits of cigarette smoking are:
n Smoking has been a valuable meditation tool, used by American Indians, as well as Eastern Indians. The effects that cigarette smoking has on the human body are nearly identical to the effects of Ritalin. With this in mind, cigarettes could be an inexpensive alternative to Ritalin and other drugs used to combat ADHD/ADD.
n Cigarette smoking can be an invaluable resource for those who are uncomfortable in social situations (Scientific studies show that cigarette smoking is less harmful than both Paxil and Prozac combined.) Aside from alcohol, cigarettes are a very powerful social lubricant.
n Cigarette smoking is popular among many of America's entertainers, including Mel Gibson, Cameron Diaz, and Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit.
n Many cigarette manufacturers offer free gifts, including T-shirts, ball caps, and pool cues, to their loyal customers. Therefore, cigarette smoking can be beneficial to those individuals who find themselves at a financial disadvantage.
n Studies have shown that America's youth are increasingly without hobbies. Cigarette smoking could easily fill that void, and provide America's children with an alternative to street gangs, unprotected sex, and vandalism.
n Studies have also shown that millions of American children are currently obese. Scientific evidence, and user testimony, has shown, time and time again, that cigarette smoking is a powerful appetite suppressant.
With all of these reasons in mind, isn't it time that you, the children of America, consider joining millions of Americans by doing your part to support the American Tobacco Industry, your parents, your friends, and, more importantly, yourself.
Sin., Marshall Field.
"Scooby Doobie Don't"
Corpus Christi, TX. (Knight-Rider) A media watch-group is urging parents to 'just say no!" to Scooby Doo.
Cable Sitters issued a statement in a press conference Monday encouraging all responsible parents to keep their children from watching episodes of the cartoon classic, featuring the mystery-solving mutt and friends.
According to Kyle Brown, head of Cable Sitters, episodes of "Scooby Doo, Where Are You?" are laced with subliminal drug references. Brown says, "[Scooby Doo] is a perfect example of how Hollywood subtly lures American children into the evil world of drugs and drug use."
Brown claims the name of the title character contains a very overt drug reference. "And what is another name for a marijuana cigarette," Brown says, "A doobie? And what is the dog's full name, but Scooby Doobie Doo."
Furthermore, he states that the drug culture's influence pervades the show.
For starters, Shaggy, Scooby's human side-kick, "is the prototypical hippie. With his 'cool-man' demeanor and his slouch, he advocates drug use and laziness. He even wears the colors of the marijuana plant, green and brown."
But that is not all claims Cable Sitters. Another drug reference involves the Mystery Machine, the van which Scooby and Shaggy use to travel from adventure to adventure.
A cloud of smoke spills out of this "stereotypical hippie van" each time Scooby and Shaggy step out of the vehicle. In his speech, Brown claims this puff of smoke implies that the pair smoke marijuana cigarettes in the back of the van. Brown also believes that Scooby and Shaggy may be abusing more dangerous substances .
"The Mystery Machine itself, " Brown says, "with its bold colors and flowers is a reference to the Beatles' Magical Mystery Tour album, a rock and roll record through which the Beatles advocated LSD use to supposedly expand the mind....When Scooby and Shaggy are riding in the van, one must also wonder what kind of trip they are actually on."
Moreover, the media watch-groups proclaims that Scooby and Shaggy's perpetual quest for Scooby snacks is an allusion to the marijuana induced feeding frenzy known as the 'munchies.'
As a result of these reference and the dangers which they cause, Cable Sitters has begun a letter writing campaign to all television stations which show re-runs of the Scooby Doo, most notably, the Cartoon Network owned by Ted Turner.
Cable Sitters, an organization of 1.3 million, also asks its members and other concerned parents to write the companies which advertise their products during showings of Scooby Doo.
Furthermore, Brown encourages parents to act immediately.
"By my estimates, thousands upon thousands of American youths have been manipulated into picking up a marijuana cigarette in order to get high because Scooby Doo and his hippie pal have told them smoking marijuana is an acceptable standard of behavior. If we are to stop teenage drug use, we must nip it in the bud."
