Lisa Burns shoved back her mass of chestnut hair, blowing out a breath. "Okay! Who dumped the confetti on the stage? Wait. I don't want to know. Just get it cleaned up. Then we'll redo scene two. Why is there a cowboy hat over here? Did Shakespeare write cowboys? Did he? No?! Didn't think so! Kim, where's the ocean? And where's my wife, we're doing Scene five again!"

quot;She's over with Mathew. They're probably getting drunk." The set designer, Melissa Burns, who was Lisa's sister, replied promptly.

"Fan-fucking-tastic."

"We're not drunk!" the voice of Lisa's wife, Kendra, floated across the backstage area.

"Not evenly minorly buzzed, sadly," a second voice, that of Kendra's best friend, Mathew, added.

"Stay that way!" Lisa yelled back. Her cell rang.

"Yeeees?" she glared at the cowboy hat that was still sitting on the stage.

"Your play? is making me want to slam my head in a deepfreeze," came the voice on the other end. "Do you have any idea what it's like to have that urge?"

"No. In all honesty, I don't. Why in God's name are you calling me? We're doing one of your scenes right now! Where the hell are you?"

Ashly sighed. "I had to leave. I have class in five minutes."

"You have class?"

"Yeah. I told Tim to tell you that."

"Oh, I'm sorry, is Tim your personal servant now? Is he your babysitter?" She darted out on stage and threw the unsuspecting hat into the audience.

"Don't bight my head off! God!"

"Well excuse me for caring about our play," Lisa bounded back to the backstage area, stopping when she was standing over Kendra and Mathew, Kendra leaning against his chest, both of them with massive cups of Starbucks coffee and looking totally relaxed.

"I'm hanging up on you, Ashly," she told the girl on the phone, and snapped it shut.

"Kendra! Scene Five, Mat we'll do scene one after that. Viola's decided to go AWOL on us so we can't exactly do scene two. Tell Neil he can go home now, we obviously don't need a sea captain if we have no Viola. What're you guys drinking? Is it Irish? Is it?"

"You said we couldn't get drunk," Kendra replied, holding out her cup. "It's caramel"

Lisa made a face. "I think I'll be okay."

Mathew offered her his cup. "Pure black coffee," he suggested.

"Really, guys, I'm okay. We're missing some swords. You guys have any idea where they went?"

"Somewhere over the rainbow!" sang Kendra promptly.

"Yay!" Lisa flailed.

Kendra flipped open a notebook. "You're coming to the GSA thingy next Friday, right?"

"What GSA thingy?"

"The one that you're bringing the refreshments for," Mathew replied, snatching the notebook and writing something down.

"I don't cook."

"Now you do," he replied.

"Where's your boyfriend?" Lisa asked him.

He shrugged. "He TAs for McTompson from three to five."

"Physics? Sick," Kendra cringed.

"Do you remember every single class that takes place on this campus?" Lisa asked.

"No. Hey, what's up with that writers' night thing? Who's running that?"

"I heard people were trying to coerce some poor unsuspecting journalism major," Lisa answered.

"No! They can't have a journalist! Find someone from the creative writing stream! We know screenwriting people!"

Lisa sighed. "Yes, because I can totally control that! We're so involved into much stuff."

Kendra gulped her coffee. "Yes. Your point?"

"You guys want to score keep for my little brother's high school basketball game?" Mathew asked.

quot;Can you slap him for me?" Lisa asked Kendra.

"Can I put flowers in my hair?" Kendra asked suddenly. "I mean, Olivia's all girly countess dreamer person, so..."

"Yes."

She blinked. "Sweet!"

"They can't be pink," Melissa said, popping up out of seemingly nowhere. "They'd clash."

Mathew fingered Kendra's short cropped red locks. "White, maybe?"

"Symbolic of virginity," Melissa nodded. "Perfect."

Mathew snickered. Kendra elbowed him hard in the stomach.

A shadow fell over them. "So my services as one-time savior ship captain aren't needed?" the Chinese music major asked, dark eyes sparkling.

"Apparently we lost our Viola," Kendra replied. Lisa clenched her teeth. "We *did*. Thanks for coming, Neil, you rock."

He shrugged. "I figured it was high time I got involved in one of these things before I graduate."

"And aren't you ever so glad you did?" Mathew asked dryly.

Neil held up his hands. "No comment."

"If it makes you feel any better, this is Heaven compared to The Picture Of Dorian Gray."

Neil blinked. "...You made that into a play."

Kendra held up a hand. "That's up for debate. We... Made it into something."

Neil laughed, and hoisted his messenger bag higher on his shoulder. "Phone me when Viola shows, would you?" he asked Lisa.

"Yup," Lisa waved as he walked away.

"He's pretty," Kendra commented as soon as he was out of earshot. Lisa pouted.

"Your attraction to others, especially men, whilst we're in the midst of a marriage, which, as far as I know is a happy one, disturbs me almost as much as your uncontrollable need to voice it at every opportunity." Lisa rested her hands on her hips and stared down at the two on the ground. Melissa was in hysterics, giggling into her hands.

Kendra arched an eyebrow, studying Lisa intently. Finally, she shrugged. "Oh." Flopping backwards onto Mathew, she finished her coffee in one long swallow.

Lisa sighed, turning away. "Your scenes are coming up. Get ready."

Kendra hated her Olivia. The countess was selfish, shallow and much too refined for her taste. Matt's chest rose and fell under her ear as she lay, curled up against him on the dirty floor back stage. He was reading Wagner. She had mocked him for it, earlier, but the caffeine had just kicked in and she felt that if she moved, she would never stop. Mathew ran a hand through her hair and she almost purred.

"I'm not at all like her," she said.

"Mmm."

She sighed. "She's desperate. Pathetic. I'm nothing like her."

He shrugged. "Okay."

She tilted her head up so that she was looking up at him upside down. "Do you have any idea what I'm talking about?"

He shook his head, continuing to read. "Not a clue."

"Fine. Where's my wig? Somehow I don't think Lisa would appreciate a red head Olivia."

"You threw it at Mika, earlier."

"Right. I knew that." She pushed herself to her feet, walking briskly to the dressing room and trying not to be Olivia.