“It’s not you, it’s me.”Barbed wire wrapped around my wrist and tried to the back of a truck. I hear you push on the gas, my wrist bleeds for you. My arm is stretched, sore, ripped. The wire, cutting into the soft skin of my wrist. Slowly I hear the pull of my arm, moving away from my body.
“I really do love you and will keep loving you as long as I live.”
Nylon rope, strong, tough. A wooden beam from one wall to the next, supporting the ceiling. Iron bolts adding to the strength of the wood. A cheap plastic chair holds me up. I can feel you tying the rope around the beam and to my neck. My hands are bound to my side. The char kicked away, I hear a snap.
“You are my best friend.”
A thousand stabs to the back. I hear the knife enter and exit. Hurts when you push it in, hurts when you pull it out. Warm velvet races down my back, keeping me warm. But I am cold. My sight is failing, my hearing is faint. Black.
“I would never want or even try to hurt you.”
A bullet tastes the same as it smells. It’s rather warm in my mouth, burning my tongue. I breathe out smoke for you. The wall behind me is covered with gray chunks and red ooze. Boom.
“Can we just be friends?”
Cold water in the sink. Warm water in the tub. My knuckles are white as I push down. The razor cutting in, and deep. The water is quick to turn pink, then red, almost black. I could hear the rip of flesh, and the pleasurable pain shot through me. I can’t swim.
“I love you.”
The sweet kiss of your lips against mine. Your arms wrapped around me, holding me. I am safe in your arms. Everything is going to be okay.
“Good-bye, Britney.”
… bottles of pills, thrown across the floor. Bottles of liquor sitting in the corners. Curled up on the bed, crying and fighting the battle inside. Foaming at the mouth… you said goodbye. I say it back to you before the battle is won. I’ll wait for the coroner now.