A MATHEMATICAL SURVEY OF
THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE

VERSION July 7, 2005 1:01 PM
WRITTEN BY

GARY WATERBURY
garywaterbury@yahoo.com

Copyright © 1999. All rights reserved.
Uses Microsoft Agent Technology
Merlin (c) 1996-1998 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.
Merlin's speech written by Gary Waterbury.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

A=1 B=2 C=3 D=4 E=5 F=6 G=7 H=8 I=9 J=10 K=11 L=12 M=13 N=14 O=15 P=16 Q=17 R=18 S=19 T=20 U=21 V=22 W=23 X=24 Y=25 Z=26

164 OUR PRESIDENT     DOLE OR CLINTON     STEVE FORBES IS     OUT OF I'M AVAILABLE     FLORIDA VOTERS     I CAN'T COMMUNICATE     PROPERTY DAMAGE	67 ADAMS RIB, A WOMAN    NAKED EVE, HAVE A BABY	129 HOLLYWOOD, START A FIGHT     USE HORSES, SEARCHLIGHTS     NO PROBLEMS, STAY TUNED     UNDERWATER
156 ELECT A PRESIDENT     DOLE VS CLINTON	74 JESUS, NEW LIFE	236 HOLLYWOOD RICH PEOPLE     POPULATION CONTROL
110 PRESIDENT     RONALD REAGAN     JAMES GARFIELD     AL GORE WON	153 HALLOWEEN NIGHT     TAKE CARE OF MY BABY	159 ON ACTIVE DUTY     THERMOMETERS     THE SPOTLIGHT
186 JOHN WILKES BOOTH     KILLS ABRAHAM LINCOLN	78 MY MIND, NON DAMAGED    I FEEL GOOD	122 A BAD BAD EARTHQUAKE     SAN FRANCISCO
175 LEE HARVEY OSWALD     KILL JOHN F KENNEDY     ASSASSIN OSWALD	80 A CIVILIAN, A CRIMINAL    A DEMOCRAT, NO MORE    CANDIDATES	69 PEOPLE, ANIMALS
7 BE, BAD	73 CRAZY, NORMAL	366 I DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE FROM YOU 3 6'S, 666 THIS IS IT...THE MARK OF THE BEAST
214 (BAD) YOU ARE VERY CRUEL     IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE DONE     THERE ARE OTHER WAYS     CAUSE DAMAGE INFORMATION	94 I AM SMART, NEAT AND CLEAN     PRIVACY, INNOCENT, GUILTY	121 START A WAR, SUBMARINES     WATCH ME DO IT     THE GULF WAR     BAD RESULTS, NOBODY CARES
168 STAY NON ACTIVE     DON'T GO OUTSIDE     ALWAYS SLEEPING     USE YOUR BRAIN     PROPER BEHAVIOR     OUTSIDE LIGHTS     THE WHOLE WORLD	164 DO NOT BE STUPID     LIFE DOES HAVE TO DIE     THE GERMAN NATION     USS VINCENNES     THOMAS EDISON DIED	110 ADOLF HITLER     I'M FREE AS A BIRD     TOTAL WAR
213   THE SECRET OF LIFE AND DEATH     LIFE DOES NOT HAVE TO DIE	142 FALSE ANSWERS,     IMPEACH CLINTON THE HOUSE IMPEACHED PRESIDENT CLINTON, THE SENATE DIDN'T REMOVE HIM FROM OFFICE.	147 THE FIRST WAR, CHEMICAL     WEAPONS, PEOPLE CONTROL     HYDROGEN BOMBS
166 WALK ON THE MOON     NEIL A ARMSTRONG     GET INFORMATION	170 WORLD WAR THREE     ATTACK PEARL HARBOR     AMERICANS VS JAPS     GOD IS A REAL ASSHOLE     SERBIA AND KOSOVO	144 DO NOT KILL LIFE           THE FLAG OF ISRAEL     GETTYSBURG     SHARE EQUALLY
150 SOCIALISTS ARE     IN PERFECT HEALTH     NON RICH PEOPLE     A PERFECT EXAMPLE     DIVIDED EQUALLY     I HAVE THE MONEY	172 WORLD WAR TWO     SCARCE RESOURCES     TOO MANY PEOPLE     INVADE A COUNTRY     THE EXECUTIONER     THINK ADOLF HITLER	118 MICROSOFT     VISUAL BASIC     A JOB WELL DONE     EXTRA EASY     IT'S NO GOOD     IS NOT GOOD
151 ONCE UPON A TIME     JESUS CHRIST     YOU WON'T DIE     DO KILL A PERSON     THEY END MY LIFE	83  SATAN IS     I WILL DIE     MOVIES     YOU DIED     END IN HELL     I AM IN HELL     GERMANY	77  AYN RAND     BE WOMEN     HAVE FUN     FREE CHOICE     BUY IT
253 GEORGE HERBERT WALKER BUSH     WITHOUT SADDAM HUSSEIN     GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN     HOW GREEN WAS MY VALLEY     SWELLING OF THE LEGS AND FEET     THE CLINTON WHITE HOUSE     USE COUNTERFEIT MONEY	162 ROMEO AND JULIET     THE WOMAN I LOVE     YOU ARE POLITE     CORRECT BEHAVIOR	158 SOUTH PACIFIC IS     A ROMANTIC MOVIE     EXHIBIT MALE FLESH     SINCE I MET YOU     YOU ARE NORMAL     SEXUAL CONTACT     A MITZI GAYNOR
76 SEX IS    DIRTY	75 DOCTOR    I AM WELL	118 JOHN MCCAIN IS     BE A PRESIDENT
114 GOVERNOR     BE GEORGE BUSH	84 ALEXANDER    THE GREAT        A RED LIGHT    HAVE SEX	87 PEOPLE DIE    DEMOCRACY    RUSSIA    THE SUN
143 GEORGE CUSTER     EVERYBODY DIED	149 JAMES EARL CARTER     THAT'S MY CHOICE     FOR PRESIDENT	145 YOU SHALL HEAR     NOSTRADAMUS     IT WILL HAPPEN
274 GOVERNMENT SURVEILLANCE        I'LL DECIDE YOUR LIFE FOR YOU	120 REPUBLICANS     AN ELITE CLASS     DON'T WORK     DETERIORATE     MASTURBATE     BUSH LOSES	98  DEMOCRATS     INDEPENDENCE     FLOWERS     VEGETABLES     SELF HEALING
104 NIXON IS        PRGHQQIEG (see * below)        WAR PLANS        PEOPLE DID DIE        TIME TO GO *[THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES]	150 RICHARD M. NIXON     I ENJOY WARFARE     THE END OF THE LINE     MY TIME IS UP	90 MUSTACHE    A SEX ADDICT
281 ISSUE COUNTERFEIT MONEY        THERE'S NOTHING HARD ABOUT IT SURE, IT'S SOFT MONEY	297 SEND TROOPS TO A COUNTRY        THE MIDNIGHT RIDE OF PAUL REVERE	201 I AM VERY VERY RICH     A PRIVATE EMPLOYER
302 WHAT YOU DO IS WHAT YOU SEE        ASSOCIATE WITH SIMILAR PEOPLE	97  HULK HOGAN     SAMPSON     U S ARMY     I AM A FIGHTER     WIN A FIGHT	155 HOWARD HUGHES CAN     EMPLOY PEOPLE
232 WAR IS NOT THE ANSWER        IMPEACH GEORGE WALKER BUSH	50    AMERICA         FIGHT (see below 182 PROVIDE WEAPONS)         BUSH	201 A ONE TERM PRESIDENT        GEORGE BUSH DOES LOSE        REPORT FOR DUTY        THE ALABAMA NATIONAL GUARD        I DIDNT WANT TO DO IT        I DO WHAT I WANT TO DO        NEITHER ILL NOR SICK
121 LITTLE KIDS     VALENTINES      MEN AND WOMEN     BUILD A MARRIAGE	140 MY VALENTINE     MY GIRLFRIEND     LET'S MAKE LOVE     CREATE A PERSON	119 ATROCITIES     VOTE FOR ME      I USE A CONDOM     A SEPARATION     ORANGE AND BLUE
261 THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA        KERRY'S VIETNAM SERVICE        DON'T VOTE FOR GEORGE BUSH	175 STORE CLOSINGS     REELECT GEORGE BUSH	129 BUSH AND CHENEY     START A FIGHT     THE IRAQI WAR     REPLACE PEOPLE     KERRY WON
217 JOHN FORBES KERRY IS     SLOBODAN MILOSEVIC IS     A HUGE DISAPPOINTMENT     HOW ABOUT BOTH OF THEM     PRESIDENT GEORGE BUSH     PRESIDENT MILOSEVIC	189 JOHN FORBES KERRY     PICK A VICE PRESIDENT     MILITARY RECORDS     BILLIONS FOR DEFENSE     WAR NOT DIPLOMACY	177 GEORGE WALKER BUSH      I WON THE ELECTION     SAME SEX MARRIAGES     FALSE INFORMATION     I AM BETTER QUALIFIED
182 NONE OF THE CANDIDATES     I'LL DECIDE FOR MYSELF     THE WORLD IS SAFER     WHAT GEORGE BUSH MADE     PROVIDE WEAPONS     YOU CRAZY FOOL	152 ELECT GEORGE BUSH     NON WORKERS     A WAR IS GOING ON     AN ALL OUT ATTACK     HOMOSEXUALS     WELL DON'T THEN     IT'S TIME TO GO	117 BUSH'S SON      BE PRESIDENT     A SECOND TERM

Let us begin A Mathematical Survey of The English Language with a definition of what it is. We shall define AMSOTEL as the collection of words and phrases grouped together by means of a simple encoding:
A=1, B=2, C=3 to Z=26. Wherein words of equal sum are grouped together.

Example:

Therefore God and Hide are placed on the same page with the heading of number 26.

In interpreting the equal summation, notice that good items and bad items are grouped together. In ordinary life only good things are grouped together and only bad things are grouped together. So, I want to issue this warning:

WARNING!!! DO NOT ASSUME THAT ITEMS WITH EQUAL SUMS ARE IN ANY WAY CONNECTED EXCEPT THAT THEY ARE EQUAL SUMS.

Also included in this code book is a second, vertical, summation:

Example:

Aside from adding words, you may also subtract words. For instance I can subtract GOD from MY LIFE and I get LBDZ. Well 4 letters beginning with an L ending with a DZ. Lodz, Poland with a population of over 800,000 is a match to me. The nice thing about this code is that regardless of what you do you will always find someone else has done it before you. The names of cities, States of the USA, Countries, etc all are the result of this code. Can you say Lodz is a city of athiests? No you can't. Why didn't Pope John II come from Lodz (instead of Cracow) to put GOD back in MY LIFE? I will do my best to answer any question, because all questions are answerable, but right now I just wanted to explain that you can subtract words from each other. A whole sentence can add up to just one word. And you can make a whole sentence out of one word. But while I'm thinking about it, Hitler subtracted people from this Earth instead of adding people to it. If you look under SUBTRACT and SUBTRACT PEOPLE you will find other bits and pieces of Hitler's crimes. Continuing on, in olden times calculations may or may not have been correct. 70% correct is passing nowadays in schools. As time passes, automation and clear thinking will allow people to be 100% correct in their output even though their input is only 10% correct. This is the case of the worker who is very grubby looking. He looks bad, swears, is obnoxious, etc. etc. but he does good work. It's also the case of the Queen's Guards. They have people staring at them, they are in cold weather, etc and yet they must be perfect. In any event, I'll give past generations 100% for working under arduous conditions.

Lastly every word has a natural number associated with it within the span A to ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. That is: A..Z..AA..AZ..BA..BZ..CA..CZ to ZZ..AAA..AAZ , etc.

In the example below vertical addition of YOU+CAN+DO+IT=ACER (which is the name of the computer I own). ACER is the 19,752nd word from the letter A. The word ACER = 27 in horizontal summation. The digits 27 are BG. Finally the 27th word from the letter A is AA. One more then the 26th. Which is Z.

A liquid, TONIC, pure and simple means I LIVE HERE.

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WOMEN ALLOWED = AMJEJJR = [women fixed it] = AMERICA

WOMEN	23,15,13,5,14
+ ALLOWED	1,12,12,15,23,5,4
= AMJEJJR	1,12,36,30,36,10,18
= AMER JJJ	AMER 3*(9+1) = rearranged = AMER ICA
= AMERICA	WOMEN ARE ALLOWED TO CALCULATE THIS WAY




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WHAT'S INCLUDED IN THIS SURVEY OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE? EVERYTHING! FROM THE BIBLE TO
POLITICS TO FAIRY TALES TO HOLIDAYS TO PEOPLE TO MUSIC TO MOVIES TO SPACE. ALL ARE MATHEMATICALLY EXAMINED.

THE CODE IS INVASIVE IN ALL ASPECTS OF LIFE

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