I KNOW
By Kathy Quinn

I understand the pain you feel
I have been there I know it is real
I know how it feels to have someone taken suddenly from you
I know how it feels to think that your life is through
I know how it feels to have your heart hurt and broken
I know how it feels to have no more words spoken
I know how it feels to not be a mom any more
I know how it feels to hate to going shopping even to the grocery store
I know how it feels to have your future taken from you
I know how it feels to hurt so bad to see the sky so blue
I know how it feels to not be in control
I know how it feels to loose your child's soul
I know how it feels to have life never be the same
I know how it feels to have to play the game
I know how it feels to be the one left behind
I know how it feels to have to try to live and be kind
I know how it feels to be angry inside your very being
I know how it feels to want to be the one leaving
I know how it feels to want to die
I know how it feels to sit and cry and cry
I know how it feels to want to stay in bed all day
I know how it feels to have things said in an unthoughtful way
I know how it feels to have someone say they know how I feel, when they don't
I know how it feels to be around friends who could talk about your loss, but they won't
I know how it feels to have people say it was their time to go, it was for the best
I know how it feels to have to fake like nothing's happened at all, to blend in with therest
I know how it feels to have to listen to a lot of irrelevant and trivial crap
I know how it feels to go without sleep days on end just wishing for a nap
I know how it feels to have to have a life taken from you unexpectedly
I know how it feels to have to try to find the strength to face such a tragedy
I know how it feels to have to try to shop during the holidays, practically impossible
I know how it feels to want to be hugged and held and not want to act responsible
I know how it feels to be in deep depression for quite a while
I know how it feels to be in shock, and even sometimes denial
I know how it feels to walk around in a daze
I know how it feels to see life as though its a haze
I know how it feels to completely not function but try to go through the motions
I know how it feels to go completely hysterical and cause a commotion
I know how it feels to be really empty inside but that's OK, its not a crime
I know how it feels to take life and live one minute at a time
I know how it feels to have to pretend to be fine
I know how it feels to live with the pain day after day after day
I know how it feels to have your priorities change by learning the hard way
I know how it feels to truly grieve
I know how it feels to be really bereaved
I know how it feels to have lost a child, mine was my only one, a son named Jason
I know how it feels to be with others in the same situation
Yes I know because sometimes that is my only salvation
It's what keeps me going on with life--being able to talk with other fathers and mothers
We talk about our kids and the effects of their death on us, as well as others
For you see being with others who truly understand and have been through the hell
Is what will eventually make us stronger and learn how to deal with the pain, as well.