I was sleeping comfortably in my bed. It was early morning, and I could hear something off in the distance. I awoke to realize it was the phone ringing. I sleepily said "Hello?". My oldest son Chris was on the line, and I knew immediately, by the way he said "Mom?", that something was wrong. He had real panic in his voice, and he told me he'd gotten a call from my son Joshua's girlfriend Angie, and that she said something had happened to Josh. She said he had gone out the night before, and this morning she heard him stop breathing, and that his heart had stopped. He said Angie had done CPR until the ambulance came, and that they had taken Josh to the hospital. My son said "They don't know if he is going to make it Mom".
My head was spinning. My heart was pounding. My sister lives next door, and I jumped out of bed and ran to her house. She was at work, but her husband was home. He calmed me enough to call the hospital. I reached the emergency room and identified myself as Josh's mom. The male nurse on the line said "Oh, well, um, what do you know so far, what have they told you?". It was then that I knew how bad it really was. The tone of his voice said it all. I told him the little bit I knew. He sounded so hesitant, so very nervous, and he began to tell me that they were losing my son's blood pressure, and that he had not woken up, and that they had him on a respirator because he was not breathing on his own. He told me I should get there right away. I hadn't kept the car that day, and Josh lived 80 miles away in another town. I was in a panic. I called my other sister Jenny, to come and get me, telling her that we had to get there right away. They had told me that my beautiful son may die before I could reach him.
My sister arrived, and we picked up my son Chris, and my daughter Kim, who had been at her friends house, and jumped on the highway. I felt like I couldn't breathe. The hour and a half ride seemed to be taking forever. I knew in my heart that although they didn't say it, Chris and Kim believed in their hearts that everything would be ok once Mom gets there. Mom will be able to bring Josh around. He'll hear her voice and will come out of it. I was secretly praying in my heart that they were right. I was terrified to call the hospital from the cellphone while we were en route. I was afraid of what I would hear. I just wanted to get there. It will be ok if I can get there.
The phone rang a couple of times and my heart nearly stopped. But it was just family checking on me. Everything was in slow motion. I was so very afraid. |
