Ever since I was a little girl, I had heard my dad talk about his other children. He spoke of his son, his namesake, Cole Lee. Everyone called him June or Junior. I met him for the first time in 1976, when I was only 10 years old…and he left a lasting impression on our minds. He was just so fun and full of life. We couldn’t help but love him from the very beginning. Also during June’s visit, we got another surprise visit from a sister, Shirley. She was also very special and left her mark on our hearts. All too soon, they left and went back to their lives in California. We heard a lot about two others sisters during this time. Betty and Darlene. We also had heard stories about a son, Donnie, who had died in a car accident in the 50’s. He was only 7 years old. We had some pictures of Betty and the other kids, but I never do recall seeing any photos of Darlene. My dad used to tell me that I favored her, looked like her. I always wondered how I looked like her. Was our shape the same, did we have the same eyes, was her hair dark like mine? I always felt somewhat odd, because my other siblings had light hair, almost blond. I hoped that I had a sister out there somewhere that had my hair coloring. I thought that would be so neat! The visit with June and Shirley only left me wondering and wanting more of them. Would I ever be able to meet beautiful Betty and elusive Darlene? Oh how I wondered what she looked like. After Shirley and June left, we never saw or heard from them again for a very long time.
In 1984 immediately following the death of my father, we tried to locate dads other children again. The last known location was Long Beach, Ca. We called every Bolin in the phone book in Long Beach and every Shirley Martinez and Betty Bennett, but we were unsuccessful in reaching them for the funeral. We were sad about that, but had no choice but to move on. We did however include all of them in the obituary.
Life went on after dads death…but his passing left me even more curious about my other brothers and sisters. Over the next few months I would periodically call around the LA and Long Beach area, continuing to search for June, but I always hit a roadblock. When I got older and started working at large corporations, I would even use the company phone to call long distance, searching over and over for some clue as to where they were. Each and every time I came up empty handed. Where were they? Why couldn’t I find them? I was SO curious about them and desperately wanted to get to know them. Darlene was on my mind a lot over the years. I wanted so much to meet and see the person that so looked like me. Over the years, after moving so much Mom and dad lost ALL of our old family photos, but the picture of Betty, Shirley and June were safe…I had taken them and hid them for my own…so that someday I might run into them and I would recognize them. I kept the old pic of June that dad had taken at the airport after June left in 1976, safe in my wallet all these years. I loved him.
Years went on and we all grew up. My sister Mary and I would talk about the other kids all the time. By the year 1999, it was all we could talk about when we were together. There was hardly a day that went by that we didn’t mention them and wonder how the heck we were ever going to find them. The main topic about the sisters was were they sexually molested by dad as we were? For some reason, we needed to know. There was some urgency about it. The funny thing is we were scared to death that they weren’t. If they weren’t it gave us the creeps that we were somehow “special” and he only preyed on us. Of course we were also scared that they WERE and had to endure what we did. Did they live as we did? Were they abused physically as well? We just had SO many unanswered questions about dad and WE knew that they would be key in helping us solve some mysteries. We wanted SO much to get to know our sisters. And we always thought of them that way…OUR BLOOD SISTERS.
1999 rolled around and Andy and I finally caught up with technology and purchased our first computer, an anniversary gift from Andy’s dear mom. We immediately signed up for AOL and got onto the Internet. It took me a few months to get used to the Internet World. There was just SO much information! I surfed and learned as I went. One day I signed on and my welcome page popped up as usual. On this welcome page was a link to a genealogy page called Gen Forum. The link suggested that by posting information on this site has enabled people to find lost loved ones. I immediately thought of my dear sisters and June. I knew it was a shot in the dark, a one in a million chance since I had only first names of the sisters. But I was determined to try anyway. It never even crossed my mind that one of my sisters would ever find the message. But I was hopeful that someone else that knew them might read it and contact me.
I posted on July 13th, 1999 on the BOLIN site, my maiden name. The message read as follows:
I am looking for relatives of Clyde Boyd Bolin, born 10/10/1915? He grew up in Clover, S.C. His father was Odell? Bolin, mother Mary Alice Bolin (maiden unknown). They had 5 children, Clyde, Odell, James, Franklin (Frank) and Winnie. My father (Clyde B. Bolin) had numerous other children that I cannot find. Last I know is that they were in the California area. Cole Lee Bolin, Betty, Darlene and Shirley Martinez? Anyone with any info please email me. I have 2 brothers, Clyde Douglas Bolin, Vernon Lee Bolin, 1 sister, Mary Jane Bolin Airheart.
I put my dads name in large letters hoping to draw attention to the name. As there are literally thousands of postings on the site, I was hoping that the name would catch someone’s attention. I prayed that a long lost cousin, aunt, uncle; ANYONE would run across it and contact me. I checked back at the site every few days to see if anyone had responded and each time no one had.
On September 13th 1999, exactly 2months after posting my message, around 5pm in the afternoon my phone rang. I was sitting on the porch swing with Andy enjoying the last days of summer. Rachael answered the phone. I asked her who it was and she said it was a lady, asking for Sheila, most likely one of my housekeeping customers. I answered the phone expecting a cancellation or reschedule. I said hello and the voice on the other end asked me if this was Sheila. I said yes. The voice introduced herself as Dee Jones. She asked me if my fathers name was Clyde Bolin. I said yes. She then said, “ I hope that you are sitting down, because this is your SISTER DARLENE! My heart stopped beating! She told me that she had been looking for me for YEARS! She said I can’t believe I finally found you! She said that she had read my posting on Gen Forum. SHE READ IT! One of my sisters actually found the message! I couldn’t believe it! It was a one in a million shot that one of my sisters would actually see my posting. I was shocked and breathless! We were both talking at once and talking so fast that I don’t even recall everything that we said to one another. I DO recall her saying that Betty and she would be online in about ½ and hour and we set up a time to meet and chat. Betty???? OH MY GOSH! Two sisters on ONE DAY!!!! I was going to be talking to both my sisters in half an hour! We hung up and the dial tone hardly had time to beep before I had dialed my sister Mary’s phone number. The first thing I said to her was what Darlene had just said to me. “I hope you’re sitting down because I just talked to out sister Darlene! Mary told me to shut up and not say another word because she was on her way to my house! She made it to my house in about 3.2 seconds! LOL. When she arrived I was had the BIGGEST SMILE on my face I think I have ever had! She just kept saying, what, why, when, how???? LOL. We couldn’t believe it!
Our first online chat went very well. We just kept asking each other a million questions. We immediately exchanged photo’s online so we could see what each other looked like! Turns out I did look like Darlene, A LOT! We were almost a spitting image of one another. The same for Mary and Betty, they looked eerily alike as well. I also think that I favor Shirley a little. Unfortunately our brother June had passed away a few years before so our happy reunion held a sad note as we would never be able to get to know him.
Within days we planned our first get together. Mary and I would fly to Long Beach and Dee would fly from Sacramento and we would all meet at Betty’s house. Shirley would be at the airport to greet us as well. On Oct. 14th we met Dee and Betty for the very first time and had a happy reunion with Shirley as well. We couldn’t quit talking in the car. We just kept staring at one another and Dee kept telling me that I looked like her. We were just beside ourselves with happiness and joy that after 30 some years we finally were able to meet and look one another in the eye. It was the most wonderful moment I can ever recall in my entire life. Life would never be the same again. We all immediately fell in love with each other. Dee and I shared an uncanny, powerful bond. We became best friends immediately from the very beginning. We finished one another’s sentences and had the same exact thoughts at the same exact moment. We still do nearly 2 years later. I guess the moral to this story is that even though we are ALL 20 years apart in age and didn’t know one another our entire lives, we have that special sister bond as though we were always together. A genetic link that no one can explain. It’s God given and it’s so strong and so powerful that nothing can ever break the link. We are sisters and we love one another unconditionally with ALL OUR HEARTS!
In the pages to follow you will be able to share our first reunion in 1999. We took tons and tons of pictures of one another. While in Long Beach, Dee and Betty took us to the cemetery where our little brother, Donnie is buried. She took us to the school where he was hit by a car and we actually stood in the exact spot where he lost his little life. It was such an extremely emotional visit. How much I wished that I had met him. He eerily favored my little brother, Vernon. They could have been twins. I love him so very much even though I never even met him. He was my precious brother, how could I not?
The top photo on this page is a pic of us four girls at the beach in Long Beach. Dee had a dream just days after her finding me. In the dream she saw us four girls in the ocean. Vernon and Doug on the beach looking on. Dad off in the distance also observing. All four of us girls just looked at one another and at the same time we all raised our hands up in the air as if saying “WE DID IT”. We are finally together and we are triumphant! I took the dream to mean that dad was happy about this reunion and maybe even had a small hand in the miracle of it all. While Mary and I visited Long Beach….we recreated the dream that Dee had. The photo says it all……we have found each other and we will be together from this day forward FOREVER! The background is a pic I took in Sacramento, standing on Dee's front porch. A Sacramento SUNSET!
Even though I didn’t particularly like to fly I have made 3 trips to the West Coast in the last year and half. My family flew to Sacramento for Christmas in 1999 and we even drove to Eugene, OR. to meet Dee’s sister Pearl and her family from her moms first marriage. I made yet another trip to Long Beach this past Aug. of 2000 to meet Pearl’s sister, Nancy for the first time. She flew all the way from Seattle, WA.! Pearl and Nancy aren’t technically sisters to me…but we have all accepted one another as such. In my heart they are as much siblings as Dee, Betty or Shirley, Mary, Doug or Vernon. We just love and accept one another as family. These are the most wonderful and accepting people that I have ever met. They are perfect and I thank GOD everyday that they are now a part of our lives. I am truly blessed!
Dee met her brothers, Doug and Vernon for the first time in March of 2000. See the happy reunion photos!
Enjoy the following pages and know that MIRACLES DO EXIST!