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Tommy learnd about Adam and Eve Sunday at sunday, he learned how God took a rib out of  Adams side and used it to make Eve. So when Tuesday came around and Tommy got a cramp in his side he said,"mom I have a pain in my side, I think I'm having a wife.
There were three old men having a conversassion. the 70 year old man said "I hate being old, every time I try to pee it won't come out." the 80 year old said "you got it easy, everytime I try to poop it won't come out." The 90 year old "said you youngsters got it easy" The 70 year old asked "what, you can't pee"? the 90 year old replied "no that comes at seven in the morning every morning, it comes and comes and comes". the 80 year old asked "what, you can't poop"? The 90 year old answered, "no that comes eight in the mornig every morning, it comes and comes and comes". Then what is your problem, the other two asked. The 90 year old replied, "I don't wake 'till nine in the morning".
A man went to restaunt to have a nice dinner, when he was served his soup he found a fly in it . the man discusyedly said "waiter what is this fly doing in my soup". The waiter looked closely then responded "it looks like its taking a swim".
There were three room mates named Poop, ShutUp and manners. Poop was working on the roof one day and he fell off. Manners went out side to help Poop while Shut Up called 911. When the police got to their house he asked Shut Up what his name was. Shut Up said Shut Up. the cop asked again what his name was and again he replied "Shut Up". By this point the cop was angry and asked "where are your manners". Shut Up answered "out back picking up Poop".
a blond was in the desert rowing a boat, another blond walked by and said its blonds like you that give blonds likes me a bad name. the blond in the boat said "if I could swim I would kick your butt". -Will
two blonds come out of the mall and realize they left their keys in the car. they spend hours trying to get their car door open. then one blond notices the sky is cloudy and says "Oh no its going to rain and the cars top is down".
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