"FOOD - NOT JUST FOR NOURISHMENT!" by Sneakers

This can be a touchy subject!
People expect you to eat whatever they put in your dish.
When you don't they get concerned.
In fact, they spend considerable time and money
just to find food that will please you.
So in this area you definitely have the upper hand!

Some tips:

NEVER display too much enthusiasm
over any food that you approve of!
If you do, people will buy it by the truckload
and feed it to you 3x a day - 7 days a week!
So, if you want a varied diet, be "inconsistent"!

It may be fun to dribble food outside of your dish but it drives people crazy! For this reason they often put your dishes on a mat or tray. This makes dribbling a bit tricky but it can be done! The next time you simply can't resist the urge try this. Grab a mouthful of food, back away from the area, and chew over the floor. It works every time! Just don't abuse this practice. If you dribble at breakfast then don't dribble at supper or vice versa.

WARNING:

Some food may look more exciting than it really is!
(This package is a perfect example.)
It's clearly marked GOLDFISH, but do you know what's really inside?
You guessed it - CRACKERS!
Some people have a "weird" sense of humor!

Always act like you haven't been fed
whenever someone enters the kitchen.
If you can manage to stay under their feet
(and in their face) and look as cute as possible
you're sure to get fed again!

If that doesn't work you can always get your own snack!

However, if it's an "inappropriate" food for you, your human will most assuredly take it away, in spite of your untiring efforts to get it!

Just don't interfere with their 1st cup of coffee.
(People seem to NEED this stuff.)
If you're patient, they may give you a little cream -
the best part of that strange smelling brew!

Try to avoid snacks that may necessitate
"A TRIP TO THE VET"! Some examples: Christmas tree tinsel, rubber bands, chocolate, (I know - it's not fair), chicken bones, or anything from the garbage. Bugs are O.K., but be careful of those lamps when you're in hot pursuit of an airborne one!
(People really NEED those lamps -
they don't see as well as we do!)