OUR MISSION STATEMENT
There is a story told in certain parts of Virginia that a traveler staying over at an inn was accosted by a stranger garbed in a flamboyant purple cape and tights. The traveler tried to ignore the stranger, but the fellow persisted, and the traveler soon became impressed with the man's knowledge of Newton's Principia Mathematica. From this, the traveler concluded that the stranger must be a physicist. Next arose the topic of the return of Jesus Christ to earth, and the stranger was so knowledgeable on this matter that the traveler thought his companion must be a member of the clergy. Grasping at any subject to steer the conversation away from this topic, the traveler, seeing a pastoral painting on the wall of the inn, brought up the matter of Virgil's fourth eclogue. Again, the traveler was so impressed with the stranger's learning that he concluded that his companion must be a classical scholar.
The stranger abruptly got up and did a series of backflips, the last one taking him out the window, and leaving the traveler with a sizable bill for the food and drink the pair had consumed. When the traveler asked the innkeeper about the identity of the stranger, the innkeeper replied, "Oh, that's just Simple Jake, pretending to be El Físico Nuclear. He doesn't actually know any of that stuff, but Físico feels sorry for him, and so he lets him borrow his powers from time to time."1
This anecdote,
which arose spontaneously out of the dregs of the Enlightenment, sometime during the late eighteenth century, may have more to say about the human condition in the modern era than anything by Derrida,Koestler, or Camus. It has been said that science is the art of substituting unimportant questions that can be answered for important ones that cannot. The study of phenomena grouped under the phrase "El Físico Nuclear" is probably best described as the art of studying questions with little or no importance whatsoever, and refusing to answer them. Depending upon whom you ask, this process will bring about the Apocalypse, the fall of the
capitalist state, or a hell of a good time.
Our goals lie somewhere in the nexus of these ends. We are merely concerned with documenting El Físico Nuclear's presence on the web, to provide an archive of web links to pages whose subject matter is connected to the El Físico Nuclear phenomena. Facts are not our concern; just as the name "Oscar" is popular today because of the fraudulent Gaelic epic Ossian, so too are the various UFO cults, the Físicons, the novels, stories, and movies, folksongs, magick rituals, psychic healings and video games all manifestations of the immense popularity of this figure. Though what you find in these pages may not be fact, it may nonetheless be true. Indeed, facts may be least important ingredient in this archive. As the recent Sokal hoax has shown us, even with referees, accident or malice may cause something which is not factual to nonetheless be declared so. Certainly this webpage has no outside
referees, and as a result errors might creep in, but we are open to suggestions and input. Indeed, such suggestions, input, and even errors may well become part of the history of El Físico Nuclear. So has the El Físico Nuclear project ever continued.
Denise Hopenhaym
Phoenicia, New York
Please read a sample from the only work about El Físico Nuclear that has been graced with an ISBN, Hermester Barrington's Death Trap at La Puente!
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© 1998 Denise Hopenhaym
OFFICIAL MEMBER
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