10.) Every time people ask you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that.
9.) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
8.) When talking to customers or clients, finish all your sentences with "In accordance to the prophecy."
7.) Send email or intercom announcements to everyone else to tell them what you're doing. For example, "If anyone needs me, I'm in the can."
6.) Have everyone address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Hard" or "The Cannibal".
5.) Steal your boss's stapler and hold it for ransom. Send him individual staples dipped in blood and nasty anonymous notes if he doesn't respond.
4.) When you're caught napping and someone shakes you to wake you, say, "AMEN".
3.) Write a memo which says, "All staff are reminded to keep the items out of the thing." Make them feel stupid for not understanding it.
2.) When you arrive late, say, "No! YOU'RE late!" Even to the office plants and photocopier.
1.) Carve your name into your desk and/or whatever equipment you use. Blame it on the new guy. Especially if he doesn't know English.
Some were borrowed from other sources.