Da Drunk Songs


(
Left to Right: Brian, Zack, Greg, Chris, Denny)

THA MO' THUGS REKOLECTIONIN' OF THA NITE: Yo, so let me be tellin' you da story of how dees songs done come into bein'.  Now my man, (in fact, you could almost say he is my "main main") well, my man Rocky Balboa wasn't much of a singer.  No, Rocky Balboa, he was a boxer.  He made movies, and he boxed in the movies he made. Luckily though, I got friends in high/drunk places that can in fact be doin' the singin'.  So one night I be haddin' a party, and after a few beers and drink-inkskies on me and my friend's parts (along with the smokey smokity smoke of a few biz-owls on my friend Denny's part) we switched on the microphone and got on with the jammin' and harm-o-nies.

WHAT THE WHITE GUYS HAD TO SAY ABOUT THE NIGHT: We got drunk and sang songs.

Wait, what's they do again?
GOT DRUNK - SUNG SONGS!!!
(das rite)

Ok, so the following is the treasured bounty (ou heard me right, it's the "treasured bounty.") of the night.  All the songs are in mp3 format and are accompanied by a little photo (when applicable) to......ehhh....to...I dunno...Help give you the gist of the song? So download and enjoy with all your drunken pals.

NOTE: Sometimes it takes a few seconds to find the file, but just wait it out.

Denny Smoked 5 Bowls - This is a great one! As you can see from the picture, Denny was born to write this song.  A definite download.  

I Had a Donut But I Don't Know Where it Went - Baked goods up to no good.  Firssst we lose the middle of the donut...But do we do anything about it? Nooooooo, we just let it slide.  Well dammit, now look what happens!!! Now donuts around the world think us consumers are lenient and soft-hearted, and suddenly the rest of the donuts just up and run away.  Bastards.

I Just Wanna Drink Beer - Drunk Ed (a.k.a. my brother) was a big fan of the music from the 80s. Hence, here is his tribute to Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun." Very amusing.

Hamster on the Dancefloor - I dunno if there was LSD in the alcohol or what, but man, I swear that I saw a hamster on the dancefloor.  Pantlegs beware!!! Hamsters unite!!!

Greg's Rant About Coke - FUCK THE SYSTEM, MAN!!!

Bottle of 151 - The shit is flammable for Christ's sake....But honestly, is it not the quickest way to get prepped for a night of good ol' drunken fun and song?

Plastic Apple - Now good ol' Chris Nelson is known toooo be an apple-tossing hooligan....Everyday at lunch during high school, he would take his shiny apple and toss it behind his back and catch it before devouring the reddy-pome goodness.  NOTE: During the 4 years of school in which Chris performed this daring feat, only ONCE did he drop the apple.  What a sad moment that was. Boo dee Hoo.

All 9 Plants - Zack was the lyricist for this little ditty.  Astronomical subject matter such as the planets always raise poignant questions such as:  Do ya s'pose the man on da moon be made uppa da cheddar cheese or somethin' more bein' like da American shit?
Answer: We landed on the moon first, so the motherfuckin' moon is ours! It's every God damned Americans birthright to be free to peer up at the night sky and proudly sneer at all the dirty, red Russian Commie-Commie-Cosmonauts who just couldn't get the fuckin' job done.

Burgercock - Hmmm...I couldn't quite find a picturre of the Burgercock on the internet.  I wonder if my brother was just making the whole thing up?

Take Me Out to the Ballgame - Here's Greg's....fruity....little version of take me out to the ballgame. Done with amazing conviction and attitude. It kind of makes you wanna stand up and do the wave.

BACK TO GREG BAUER'S BEG FOR ATTENTION

 

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