28 November 2000
Love mom
Go for it.
Attached was a picture of a guy, fishing. Him:Hi, did you want to talk?
Me: my mother is horrible isn't she?
Him: She's not bad...why do you say that?
Me: She is just rather eccentric
Him: Well at least she keeps you on your toes
Me: So she told you that I was born a boy, right?
Him: No, she didn't tell me about that
Me: I am kidding.. well you fish huh?
Him: yes, I do fish...did she tell you the story with that fish?
Me: no
Him: Well, I caught the fish in Yellowstone Lake and it was a Lake
Trout (which aren't indigenous to Yellowstone Lake). Anyway, it's a federal
felony to release lake trout back into the Lake because they destroy the
natural Cutthroat Trout found there
Me: so you threw it back, huh?
Him: No I didn't, I gave it to someone else who ate it
Me: i would have thrown it back
Him: and become a felon?
Me: i don't eat meat
Me: What is the last book you read?
Him: Well, the last book I completed was The Power that
Preserves...the book I'm reading currently is The Wounded Land
Me: What genre?
Him: They're fantasy books
Me: oh
Him: You were searching for something more substantial weren't you?
Him: So what do you like doing in your spare time?
Me: Drinking
Him: Well I should hope so...humans need a lot of water to survive
;-)
Him: But what do you do for recreation?
Me: Drinking
Him: That's it huh?
Me: pretty much. looking for something more substantial?
Him: Well, I was hopping there'd be a little something more than just
one activity
Me: I actually read a lot, write even more, and chain smoke.
Me: Open spaces make me clostrophobic.. like i will choke on
nature..
Him: You're a pure bread city girl huh?
Me: not really. suburbs... lawn mowing dads and all
Him: but you don't like places like Yosemite?
Me: i don't remember the last time i went there
Him: So were you kidding about the clostrophobia of open spaces or
were you serious?
Mom: did you ask him where he grew up? where he is going to work up
here? what his interests are? you have give the guy something to talk about
Me: maybe he is just boring?... why? why can't he be the interesting one?
Mom: Doro, give the guy a break.. he is a sweet nice person
Mom: ask him questions.. you are such a great girl
Me: pep talk?
Mom: sure...LOL
Me: he wants to tell me about fishing mom!!! no!!!
Mom: he is telling you how he throws them back...LOL
Me: but with a hole in it's mouth... that is like a piercist
grabbing people off the street piercing their tongues.. yanking it out and
throwing them back!!
Me: Mom do i not have enough men problems?
Me: yeah this is going well
Mom: LOL.. you don't have to talk to him .. go to bed
Mom: just tell him that you are tired and perhaps you can talk again
sometime
Me: NOTE TO MOM FOR FUTURE REFERENCE: I do not like boys who have
hobbies or social activites.. I like drinkers, poets, musicians, basically
fucked up individuals.. No wholesome tighty whitey wearing boys for me!
Mom: yes daughter..LOL
Me: but no more convicts
Mom: nope
Me: ok deal
My mother worries about me. She worries that I smoke too much. I drink too much. I live alone; soon I'll be creating a cat collection. I am thankful that she cares but sometimes, sometimes it borders weird. She once sent a guy into a store I was working in to meet me. Nice enough guy but totally not my type. That is when I set him up with a friend. Turned out he was an ex-con arrested six times in jail twice for murder. I do not need my mother's help to find losers. I can spot the biggest loser in the room and fall madly for him. I am still mastering the art of this whole dating thing. In the last week my mother has gotten worse with the whole Yente thing... I came home to this last night:
this guy is really nice... he is cute too. 6' 6" tall, blonde hair and blue
eyes.
he is moving up her from LA in a couple of weeks. he is 25. his name is
{Removed to protect the innocent victim of my mother} and
and his birthday is 3/6/75......
And then he sent me an Instant Message.....
HIS SIDE
I do not think I need anymore proff that my mother has no clue what I look for in men. As this conversation is going on I am also talking to my mother.
MOM'S SIDE