Nakedman is BACK! And better than ever!
July 2, 2006

Nakedman has been gone for a long time, and on some super-secret mission from what I understand. Needless to say – he’s back now. So I’ll just RP showing up in the AoD room and will have everyone sitting around doing nothing, with a basic assumption that the situation as I last saw it is the same situation that is going on now. After all, this is the AoD we’re talking about – so it’s not like any plots would have advanced. Oh, and I don’t care if Radical Ryan and Killall technically aren’t signed up as AoD stable members on the stable page. They count. As does Highland Terror, who is AoD 4 Life.

Naked: Ziggity-zaw, ziggity-zoo! Pow pow pow! Nakedman is back!

Audience: *cheers*

Holy Evil: AGH! What the hell?! Where did that audience come from?

Naked: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Holy Evil: Yes, in fact I would. Which is why I asked.

Naked: …

Holy Evil: …

Killall: So Nakedman, how were things on your ultra-secret mission?

Naked: Oh, you know. Same ol’ same ol. I’m doing just fine, except for a little bit of stomach trouble. I think I may have an ulcer or something. Grr! Damn H pylori!

Holy Evil: Ugh. This isn’t going to be another repeat of that “coming back with Avain Flu” plot line you did the other month, is it?

Naked: Uhm… no. Amoxicillin, clarithromycin and omeprazole should due the trick! Then I’ll be perfectly fi-AGHH!!!!!

Nakedman’s stomach explodes, sending chunks of flesh flying everywhere.

Radical Ryan: AGH! Gross! And yes, I am in this post.

A hand reaches out from the stomach, and then an arm. Soon, a whole entire human being tunnels there way out of Nakedman’s body… and emerges, covered in blood and gooey inside stuff.

Dr. A: Gobble gobble bitches!

Holy Evil: *gasp*… Dr. Abortion?

Dr. A: I know. Am I not the single greatest most awesome individual to ever live?

Radical Ryan: How the hell did you do that?

Dr. A: Do what?

Radical Ryan: Tear through Nakedman like that?

Dr. A: Hahaha… well don’t you see? I was really Nakedman all along!

Holy Evil: You were?!

Dr. A: No. I was just lying there.

Killall: I find your emergence from Nakedman’s stomach to be highly entertaining, as it is a clear allusion to the birth of a child… and as you are Dr. Abortion and hate children being born alive, this seems in ironic contrast to your entire persona.

Dr. A: MY GOD! YOU’RE RIGHT, KILLALL! I have sullied myself by being re-born! I must cleanse my own filth!

Dr. A runs to the AoD bathroom and shuts the door behind him.

Holy Evil: Hrm. Well that was odd.

Killall: *pokes Nakedman’s hollow shell*

45 minutes later…

Radical Ryan: Boy, Dr. Abortion sure has been in there for a long time.

Holy Evil: Maybe we should go in there and check on him.

Killall: Yes, let us do that. Because I need to pee anyway.

And so they head into the room… and there they find Dr. Abortion stark nude, fingerpainting on the bathroom walls – using the blood that covered him instead of actual paint.

Holy Evil: Uhm… what the hell are you doing?

Killall: Hrm. Maybe he’s stark naked so that he can assume the identity of Nakedman in this fed, and nobody will be the wiser.

Dr. A: Huh? What? Oh yeah… I’m pretending to be Nakedman. That’s why I’m sitting around nude. Not because I’m totally insane. Eh-hehehehehehe!

Dr. A then sees that the water faucet is looking at him the wrong way and gets into a fight with it.

Killall: Yeah, we should go now. I’ll find another bathroom. Or better yet, just pee on Battlestone’s door.