My Journal
November - 2000

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November 14th
It has been a very long time since I have updated but it has truly been impossible until now. I received what was called “mobilization chemo-therapy” on October 13th, 14th,& 15th (I think, my dates are very confused). I did pretty well the first couple days but then got very sick. I had uncontrollable diarrhea for several days, they finally put me in the hospital because it was so bad and I was so weak. It turns out that my small bowel and intestines became perforated and blew-up so to speak. I was heavily medicated for pain and with anti-biotics. My family here in Longview were informed to come up there because the doctor team that I had, felt I would not make it. My family came immediately as well as several friends. I felt I was dying, I could feel my strength leaving me every moment. My family and friends pulled me through with their strength and determination. The most important thing to me at this point was getting back home. I told the doctors to just make me well enough to make it back to Longview. I was transported by ambulance back to Longview on Nov. 1st. My oldest son followed the ambulance back and was there for me when we entered the emergency room. I was immediately taken up to 7th floor Oncology where I have been until the 9th, last Thursday. They were able to stop the bleeding and get my gut back under control. My blood counts are not very good yet and my doctor feels they never will be again, too much chemo. So, this leaves me with a smaller tumor than I started with and a little more time. I will not be able to have chemo again for at least two months, if at all. If we can do radiation without messing up my gut we will try that twice but that is it. Now I am going to live the remaining part of my life loving my family, my dogs and thanking God for each new day he gives me. I want to thank all of you so much for the cards, flowers, letters, financial support, spiritual support and friendship that you have extended this stranger, I will remember you always and you will remain in my thoughts and prayers. I will update as my health permits.

November 30th
So much has happened in the past few weeks. I told my docotr I didn't want any more shots and stuff if they weren't working anyway, they hurt my tummy so much and bruise it, so she stopped them. I resigned myself to the fact that I may not be around much longer because of my blood counts, no more chemo etc. and began trying to live what life I had left to live and getting my house in order for that final transition. We decided to do Thanksgiving here, Robert did the turkey and Crystal and Melody did everything else, I supervised (lol). David had to work, at double time and a half I would of too and my brother couldn't come down because he was very sick, so it was just the us and the grand-girls for dinner. They did a very good job with dinner, had me eating seconds. We had much to be thankful for and enjoyed a very nice day. I had another doctors appointment this past Friday for the onging and sporadic diarrhea, finally found out what it is and has been for the past year and a half (untreated/undetected), it is called C-DIFFISILE for short. I now have antibiotics to get rid of it, HURRAY but more importantly, my counts are now back to normal, they are even in the midrange of normal. This means I will surely be able to have chemo in January to get rid of the remaining tumor. OUR PRAYERS have been answered folks.

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December 2000

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