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David Letterman Quotes, David Letterman quotations, paul shaffer quotes, late show quotes, quotes about dave, quotes about David Letterman

"Have we got a dump truck of a show tonight!"
- David Letterman

"Here's what I did this morning. I get out of my bed and I do my Iraqi Elite Republican Guard exercises. Here's what you do: you put your hands over your head and keep them there."
- David Letterman

"He's a ruthless dictator but he also thinks he's a playwright. Saddam wrote a play called 'Zabiba and the King' ... attendance has dropped off since Nathan Lane has left the show."
- David Letterman

"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York, announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming
a two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman

"How many of you have heard about the Monkey-pox? This is very serious. In an effort to curb the spread of Monkey-pox, the
US government has banned the sale of Prairie dogs. Gee, I hope this doesn't affect the price of the Whopper."
- David Letterman
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