Everything I need to know I learned from watching "Quantum Leap"

Lyrics for -
Fate's Wide Wheel
Somewhere In The Night



Use a phone to talk to your invisible friends in public.


One person can make a difference.


Holograms may be great at offering moral support, but they can't throw you a rope.


"When dealing with quanta, anything can happen." (Thames, "Return Of The Evil Leaper").


"There are five stages of love: the first is denial, the second is sex, then there's acceptance, then there's divorce, and then there's more sex, if you're lucky...." (Al, "A Hunting We Will Go").


"Just forgive everybody and don't talk too much." (Al, "Leap Of Faith").


"Once you've seen the light, you can't go back into the darkness." (Sam, "Color Of Truth").


"How come you can never find a time machine when you need one?" (Captain Galaxy, "Future Boy").


Good lookin' guys make women nervous. (Frank LaMotta, "Jimmy").


"We bother, because that's what we do. We're professional botherers." (Sam and Al, "A Single Drop Of Rain").


"Even heroes are human." (Sam, "Trilogy, pt 2").


Beware the evil leaper.


"You can't hit a home run if you never step up to the plate." (Sam, "The Play's The Thing").


"Some people are like the foundation of a building.... unseen, never noticed, but crucial to holding up all that is around them. And if that foundation should crumble.... " (Sam, "A Single Drop Of Rain").


Never go after a psychotic killer without a bullet-proof vest. (Al, "Killin' Time").


Improvisation can solve any problem.


A hair drier can blow out the whole city. ("Double Identity").


"Everything has an explanation. We just haven't found it yet." (Sam, "The B**g*em*n").


"The road is not made of asphalt, but of the people we meet." (Jack Kerouac, "Rebel Without A Clue").


You can always staul to prevent answering.


"It's good to leave yourself open to new things." (Sam, "Nowhere To Run").


"Don't you see, Al? It doesn't matter if you kill a man with a gun or a pen - in the end he's still dead." (Sam, "Promised Land").


"People in monogamous relationships don't wake up with guilty consciences. They don't have any fun, either." (Al).


"We can't change what happened, but we can change what WILL happen." (Sam, "Raped").


"Don't do anything I wouldn't do. But if ya do, take pictures." (Al, "Southern Comforts").


"Tina's having an affair with Gooshie." (Ziggy, "The Leap Back").


"Tina's married to Gooshie." (Edmund St. John, "A Leap For Lisa").


"What kind of whorehouse is this?" "One where no one has to do anything they don't want to." (Patron and Sam, "Southern Comforts").


"Learn to write and read, you know it's guarenteed - plant the seed and you'll get the flower." (Al, Alphabet Song Rap, "Shock Theatre").


"College is a four-year license to learn and have fun without the pressure of family." (Sam, "Return Of The Evil Leaper").


"There is no such thing as vampires" (Sam, "Blood Moon")


"There is no such thing as Angles" (Sam, "It's a Wonderfull Leap")

"The me I am is all that's real to me" ("Fate's Wide Wheel", Glitter Rock).

"It's Superbowl XXX, and the Steelers are down by 3" (Al, "All Americans")


"Sometimes `that's the way it is` is the best explanation" (Al the bartender, "Mirror Image")

"I do not want to go on living in a world where fear and hate hide behind a call for justice" (Sam, "Justice")

Don't try to fry swiss cheese (look what happened to Sam on "Shock Theatre")

Dr. Samuel Beckett - Phd, MD, Nobel prize winner, and Ms. Deep South 1959!

Always look before you leap, or at least have Al tell you what to do

"You've gotta reach for the stars, not for the ceiling!" (Sam, "Memphis Melody")

The best way to order a cheeseburger is rare, no tomato, extra onions

Zippers are a wonderful invention

The Redskins are the best damn team in America

Always check for goats before using a ladder to repair the windows

Never go to a psychiatrist who is crazier than you are

"I don't want my children to grow up in a town that is capable of linching one of its own" (Larry Stanton, "Trilogy")

"Them that dance with the devil are bound to get scorched" (Tulley, "The B**g*em*n")

If you're a girl, and a guy is acting 'inappropriately' just pretend Sam Bekett just leaped into you, and give the guy a flying noodle kick.

If you're a guy, and you see the girl you've been acting 'inappropriately' with start talking to herself and waving her arms around, WATCH OUT!!

G-d has a wonderful sense of humor!

It's easier to catch a trapeze artist attempting the triple with your eyes open.

You can't hit a hologram in the face with a pie.

If you don't know the answer, make it up. According to Al, it's more fun!

Life is a kick in the butt!

Your chances of being slugged in the jaw for no good reason are best in the first few seconds between your arrival someplace and the running of the credits.

Even the most refined computerized methodologies for predicting probabilities are really no more reliable than human hunches

Women are absolutely crazy to wear those things on their feet.

Pool cues, airplane controls, and baseballs should all be handled like a woman.

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