| . I N T R I C A T ' s . . |
| M a r 5 , 2 0 0 3 . A I D S C r i s i s i n A f r i c a Dear Lord Jesus, whose powerful hands formed the continents we live on, poured in the waters to contain our oceans, and continually sustain the lives of creatures large and small living on and in them, Please attend to the orphans, mothers, adolescent boys and girls, men and women who are victims of the HIV and AIDS crisis in places such as a slum in Nairobi, Kenya, in Uganda, in Ethiopia and in other affected African countries; in Haiti, in Nicaragua and other affected Carribean regions. Lord, many and many of them are in pain because they have developed AIDS. Many youngsters are left on their own without money, without education and without hope for the future because their parents have died of AIDS. Many people are abandoned and rejected because they are infected with the HIV. Lord, attend to their needs, attend the the pain and despair in their hearts. Send more people there to help and to educate. Particularly, send many more hearts of Christians to go and love them as you yourself have done in the past. Lord Jesus, may your love be felt and known. Young boys and girls also need to change their sexual behaviours. Lord, inspire those who are in helpful organizations and policy makers to find effective ways to promote protected sex and fidelity if people are not able to practice absolute abstinence from sex. Lord, help the nations, compell the leaders, show your love to the people. Give your love to those who are in pain, and your hope to those who are without hope. Lord, show your presence in these places who are in danger and crisis -- where people need you and your love so much, so much Lord. In Jesus name, AMEN. |
| In this semester, I have been taking a sociology course on AIDS, about its pandemic in North America, and also its crisis in this world. I have visited Mission Fest Toronto this last weekend as well. For the first time, the Lord helped me bridge the issue of HIV/AIDS and Sex, a topic so avoided and tabooed in the church, with the love of Christ Himself. That is, Christ's love has not been demonstrated, felt and known enough in Africa, especially those hurt by HIV and AIDS, and this crisis literally and practically needs help! Yet based on the book T h e a W A K E P r o j e c t Evangelical Christians are the least likely to help with the AIDS Crisis. Only 3% said they would participate to help. I have been saying this prayer because I am saddened by the knowledge of the reality of the suffering and crisis through reading true stories from these places. I do not know what is next to do. But at this moment, I pray and lift them up to the Lord Jesus. CT |
| M a r 1 0 , 2 0 0 3 . r e : g e n e r a t i o n & v e r i t a s f o r u m I went to the student prayer meeting at church yesterday morning, and aftwards discovered something pretty cool -- a magazine: r e : g e n e r a t i o n q u a r t e r l y also called RQ, and there is an online version at [ r e g e n e r a t o r . c o m ] at first glance, it's reflects thoughtfully on our culture, and aims to transform it; it comments on, critiques, and celebrates the church. it seems to see beyond traditions or cliches and worn-out assumptions. i see myself visiting and reading this site a lot in the near future. check it out for yourself. [ RQ ] connected with re:generator is the veritas forum which i am hoping to look more into. they are forums or conferences across North America to "engage the University in its most fundamental purpose: the pursuit of truth". personally, i really want to literally go to these forums to check it out. [ click ] I have to say i really like this stuff. i am really excited about them. i keep thinking to myself, it's my kind of stuff! I wonder why, preliminary (before I have familiarize myself with them). I think it's 'cause I question things a lot -- maybe I am really skeptical at times. I have been to various churches at different places, and seen different ways and traditions of worship and fellowship. Differences make me wonder what then is truly important? I want to know what the bottomline is -- maybe, what i mean by "the bottomline" is also called the truth by others. And sometimes, I wonder why the church does not even bring up openly and address important issues that so many people in this society are concerned with or even suffering from. Issues about e.g. sexually transmitted diseases, such a large health and politicalized concern in our society, are rarely or never addressed at churches. Aren't we being a little bit ignorant at times? I guess so far I really like re:generation because it breaks through the tabooed and ritualized barriers in the churched Christian population and really strives to find honest, thoughtful and compelling ways to help the society and the north american culture to see and discover for themselves the relevance of the Gospel at this point in time in human history. CT |
| M a r 1 3 , 2 0 0 3 . m y m a r k s As some of my friends observed, I have been very down and troubled lately. Particularly, during reading week, I had trouble concentrating and feeling productive about my studying. I was too worried to the point of being paralyzed in face of three sociology midterms for that coming week (2 on that tuesday, 1 on early thursday morning). There had been a few days when I felt that I have only really studied for 45mins - 1 hour while staring blank at the books for 4-5 hours worrying about something else. When I came out from my first exam on Tuesday, I really felt that I was really dead. I regret being so troubled though sometimes I couldn't help it. I felt I was going to fail the test and even had special request that the TA gives me my grade before the drop date. It was a terrible week. But in the past few days, I have received back two of the three tests that week. Surprisingly now that I think of it, they are all in the 70's range, which to me is such a wonder in my fourth year. Fourth year had never felt easy to me. I think the review-right-after-class method suggested by a very smart friend really pay off unknowingly. It really doesn't look as bad as I imagined, thought and worried ahead of time then. Maybe that's a change in attitude I need to have about tasks and stress I am dealing with in general. In the past two days after my tests on wednesday, I also take some times to deal with the miscellaneous responsibilities like applications for summer jobs, little journals for my AIDS class, too, and NETFILE for income tax returns next. Those are efforts for me to take ownership of my own life. That's what I needed to do -- take ownership. So today is actually the first day after many weeks, yes weeks, when I could think, "well, things aren't really that bad after all." CT |
| [ M y P l e a t o G o d f o r l o v e ] 2:14am - Mar 12, 2003. |
| Response [ J u s t a s I a m ] |
| M a r 1 7 , 2 0 0 3 . G r e a t d a y ! N o t e v e n n o o n ! - Started the day early at 8:00am JUST TO WORK ON MY ESSAY!!! --> That's miracle for sure! - Ate 3-4 fortune cookies for breakfast! Haha! --> Nope, I didn't steal them at Kowloon, as James suspected. - Earned $40 bucks by pointing at targets on a touchscreen --> Some Psych Experiment in the Sid Smith G-level. - Wanted to take pictures of the residence construction zone --> The "new" New College Residence at Willcocks and Spadina - Put up posters last night to remind myself not to slack off! --> One says, "Make it HELL week now, or it'll be hell week later!" --> Another says, "Refuse to waste time! When you start or want to be lazy, Resist the temptation, and Rely on God's strength to work hard!" Oh, man! I need these loud rude posters to wake myself up sometimes since there's no Daddy there yelling at me to start wokring. |
| M a r 2 0 , 2 0 0 3 . W a l k - o u t ( a g a i n s t W a r ) I went to the Walk-out at 3pm, thinking, "just to check it out". Guess what! In 15 mins, I had my camera with me, following the crowd from Sid Smith on St. George St, up to Bloor, East to Yonge (Crowd sitting for a bit), up the 2nd floor of "Stollery" the suit store at Yonge and Bloor, then down Yonge St, and looping on Dundas to University till the crowd arrived at the American Consolate - approx. 3 hours! I was trying to capture some atmosphere and the crowdedness. There were a lot of roaring and cheering, and you could hear it echoing on the streets. Some cars were honking - that added to the atmosphere. [ d o c . a l b u m ] |
| M a r 2 6 , 2 0 0 3 . C o u g h & C r u x Been having a really bad cough for the past few days. I am like that. Whenever I have lots of school work to deal with, my stress level is at an inverse relation with the performance of my immune system. Night time, I've trouble falling asleep properly. It's itchy and irritating in the throat. Waking up feeling so fatigued, there were few moments when I couldn't help suspect that I have the atypical pneumonia that has been so hyped up everywhere. But of course I don't. If I do, I would have an really bad fever, feel totally sick, and have severe chest pain. Lately, I wanted to read less on reading Christian literature, but actually more the Bible itself to know of and experience God's love. I went to the Crux Bookstore at Wycliffe yesterday trying to find a book that guides Bible Studies that explores God's love. For sure, that sounds like quite a narrow selection. Not surprisingly the staff there had nothing in particular coming to his mind. Anyhow, I took down on my palm pilot a list of books that I would want to read in the near future. One of them is called "The Gospel according to the Simpson's"! (Culture and the Gospel ... *hint hint*) There was also a special translation of the Book of Psalms by Merrill called "Psalm for praying" that I want to get. Instead of struggling with emotions on my own, I want to more and more use the Bible to guide me in managing and expressing my emotions, and knowing where God stands in the ups and downs, the intense and the ordinary days He's blessed me with. Psalms sounds like the book to go to or start with. |
| M a r 2 7 , 2 0 0 3 . S u n r i s e t o S i c k n e s s Came home at 5:30 a.m.. Yes, "a.m.". Putting all the literature review for my Zimbabwe paper together at Robart's second floor all night long, till sunrise... On my way home along Harbord St, how I realized that the Sun and its light wasn't coming from my right, or Bathurst. But the bluish glimpse of it was climbing up from "Sutton Place", the East. It's different this time. It's not sunset like all other days. The streets, so quiet. So dim but so fresh; though for me, the freshness was overriden by my tiredness and tight plans the next day. My head was winding down; too drained to think anything beyond that. Then I woke up so sick in the morning, still very sick now. This "anterior stuffiness" all around the nose, throat and in the head. Not SARS so far; more like a bad cold, so no worries. |
| M a r 3 1 , 2 0 0 3 . G o o d a n d B a d (5:35pm) Good news is that I have gone outside jogging with RN in the afternoon though it was a bit cold today (-1C). It was quite a sunny day. We made it all the way straight to the Casa Loma in 17mins from Wilson Hall, where I live. 17mins straight is quite a record for me, although afterwards my lungs were really sore. Might be a bad idea for me to breathe in so much cold air when I am still having a cough and a cold. Oh well, it still great that I went outside and got active! I think I was described as having an extremely good mood today. Maybe I did! (3:00am) Bad news is that now because I have run so much today, I can't fall asleep even late at night. I thought I was going to sleep so well after some rigorous exercise. But now because both of my feet are actually too sore, I am really conscious of them. They are giving me a lot of discomfort. I cannot fall asleep properly. This is really frustrating. |