| Thursday, Dec 5, 2002. Video: Workin' like "Crazy" I had enough of my "cry-baby" sharings for the past few weeks. So I decided to share about something about others, stories about someone else for a little bit. Katherine Church, a researcher who works with psychiatric survivors, came to our Sociology of Family & Health class to show us a video called "Workin' like Crazy". The video tells of stories about people with mental illness, such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or depression, and on medication, striving to survive well come together to make and run a business - A-Way Express which we sometimes see on TTC subways and buses and a restaurant The Raging Spoon down on Queen St. West. Lots of the psychiatric survivors interviewed in the video could not work in the public sector because they usually have to hide the fact that they are suffering from a mental illness, are on medication and they also have to try so hard to hide the scars on their arms (because they have self-inflicted before). And if they are discovered, they would have to explain with a long long story that makes it very stressful. Hiding and hiding just to go to work is very tiring. This video was intended to illustrate the lives of psychiatric survivors from their personal experience and point of view, their community - like an in-group perspective. Their pain of being called "crazy" or "mental patients" is revealed. A lady, a survivor of schizophrenia, would rather call herself a "witch" in her book than to be called "crazy" because a witch gets listened to while a "crazy" person does not. A guy Scott only gets to see his psychiatrist for 10minutes onces every three months. He says, "that's not a good way to really get to understand a person". Yet the psychiatrist gets paid how much - so much Scott can never have thought of. I come out from the video, I was stunned still to know about this. At least one thing striked me. I wonder how many students like myself enter into university thinking they want to be a psychiatrist so they can earn so much, so much. How much is their "service" worth, if it is at the expense of another person's life who they might not even intend to take time to scrutinize and empathize with - besides memorizing the diagnostic categories, list of symptoms, drug names and code of conduct? |
| Wendesday night, Dec 4, 2002. My ICQ "Away" Message: 8:40pm Aaarrgh! This is waszhfisgy-ly impossible! =:::( 8:51pm I'm paralyzed.. my fear is melting into tears.. 8:57pm can tears really be "liquid prayers"?.. 9:01pm I might fail my course 'cause of this paper. 9:07pm But I'll try my best now; at least when I look back tomorrow, I'll know I haven't failed myself tonight. While I was having a hard time writing my research paper for a memory seminar. I felt guilt and fear. Guilty when i think back to the past 2-3 months. I wonder how come this has become so last minute when I had all the time to start it and work on it. I was guilty for not making great use of my kind professor who offers to help us out in the process. Then, I fear failing. I fear handing in a crappy piece of work and feeling really terrible about it. I fear of having to think that I am a dumb person, looking at my paper. |
| Finally, the 60% paper was emailed to the prof at 4am. Thanks! to God Who sustains me, comforts me in my "liquid prayers" (as Carny would call it). Thanks! to God Who gives me wonderful sisters and brothers and friends who are there for me. Thanks! to God Who answers prayers. |
| DeCemBer 2002 |
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| The Icon i have come to love so much. (Classical Conditioning online ) |
| Link coming-up: Great things my friend said to me on ICQ |
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| User Details = curiosity? |
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| Delete = disinterest? |
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| Rename Users = unwillingness to adapt to another's unconventional identity? |
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| Mesage icon = opened lines of communication and relationship? |
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| Web Poem, making meanings online |
| [ Respond ] |
| Dec 14, 2002. |
| An amazing trip to HONG KONG Sooo much to describe! Dec 16, 2002 Monday "I miss Toronto!" was the thought during the plane ride. Left Toronto for Hong Kong via Chicago. Slept through out. Dec 17, 2002 Tuesday Arrived Hong Kong safely (6.15pm). Picked up by Mom and Dad at the Airport. "I still miss Toronto!" Window-shopped a computer mall in Cheung Sha Wan. Dinner at my grandparents'. Dec 18, 2002 Wednesday Visited the HKIEd (Hong Kong Institute of Education) in Tai Po and had lunch with Ah Poh and Flora. It's such an interesting campus, with residence buildings leaning on a hill. It's a beautiful scene but by polluted by a construction site at the tail of the mountains. Dinner at my grandparents'. Dec 19, 2002 Thursday Met up with Erica, and went to DGS's Mini Bazaar together. Not as crowded as we anticipated. No longer recognize many faces in the school. Half of the souvenirs were sold out when we got there. Got a nice CD if the old girls choir, some miscellaneous stickers and ruler. Then, walked around shopping miscellaneous things for orderlists from friends in Toronto... CDs, Magazines, clothing etc. |
| Dec 20, 2002 Friday Dayout with Dad. Went to pick up things from Kit (Steve's friend) in Wai Chai Station and then saw a Camera Exhibition with my Dad and the Conference Centre. Tried out so many different types of digital cameras... At the end of the day, I decided I wanted an Olympus C-730 (an improvement of C-720) with 10X optical zoom, 3.2 megapixel, Multi-dial modes, and other features to manipulate. Feels great to hold it 'cause it feels like a camera, not just an auto one! Dec 21, 2002 Saturday Volunteered at the front of my Mom's bank in Tuen Mun, helping promote and sell VISA card packages at her branch. Most people passing by are not interested in what we have to offer. It meant so much when someone would actually stop by to listen. Picked up Shirley's CPU from Toronto from Lara's apartment in Tsuen Wan. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Dec 22, 2002 Sunday Went to Worship at St. Andrews, Nathan Road, Jordan, Kowloon. Sang Christmas Carols, watched a special musical performance by the children and youth there. Then met up with my Dad to get my new digital camera IN A RUSH! Yes! My Olympus C-730! First shots at NGAI WAH, my 26 year old cousin's graduation from Medical School at the University of Hong Kong. Family picture time! I have a whole series of them now. Will be uploaded on a web-based album soon! Went to Shirley's home in Hong Kong to help KAWAI, shirley's 11-year-old brother to put the computer together. We end up putting the computer DESK together first! Then family winter banquet at restaurant in Cheung Sha Wan. Hm... yummy! Dec 23, 2002 Monday Stayed home to rest. Went out around 4pm to the park and beach downstairs from my apartment to take pictures till Sunset. The ocean, the coastline, the sunset, the greenery, the apartment buildings, fountains, a little boy biking around and the dog who chased me ('cause I accidentally stepped into a private space)!! Dec 24, 2002 Christmas Eve Stayed home with Dad for a quiet day. Did not go out in the evening. For the past week, I had been feeling very distant and insecure in Hong Kong. Missed my buddies in Toronto. I called Nicole late at nite and had a really nice long-distance chat with her over the phone - then I felt reconnected and refreshed. Warm feelings came back into my life. Dec 25, 2002 Christmas Day Got up early in the morning to ride the mini-bus to Monkok, met up with SAU YING and went to Shirley's home church in TO KWA WAN together. Small church embedded in an old building, but very warm people goes there. Testimony sharings followed by baptisms. Because Shirley has already showed me pictures and told me stories of many sisters and brothers at her church, when I arrived, it's as if I have known them for a very long time! That does make a difference. Met MAN TING, AH HAY, recognized BIU, SIU YEEN. Took pictures with people and of the church. Watched a special Christmas Evangelical Drama performance. Sat with KAWAI (Shirley's bro) and his friend KINGLAM. Enjoyed AH SEE's (a theology student) message - very down-to-earth and convicting. She reminds me of one of the core reasons for me to accept Christ and remain a Christian. Enjoyed talking with SOOK FONG a very interesting, energetic and encouraging lady. Dinner at Grandparents' at Cheung Sha Wan. Dec 26, 2002 Boxing Day Continuing from Christmas Day, it's a public holiday. Stayed home with Mom and Dad, quiet day. My Dad spent all these days trying to fix my laptop for me. Dec 27, 2002 Friday Full Busy day! Morning: Left home and rode on the bus at 8-something am, met up with Sally at Southton's McDonald's, Wai Chai. Then walked with her to her Church, met a few of her sisters and brothers, took pictures of an interesting church building. On my way to the MTR (subway in Hong Kong), stopped by the Environmental Resource Centre, watched an information video there... Hong Kong has problems with excessive use of plastic bags, lack of recycling practices, noise pollution, light pollution... Afternoon: Arrived KAWAI's at 2pm and fixed his computer (Shirley's computer from Toronto) for the whole afternoon. Shirley's Dad meant to treat me and my dad for dinner. I went with 11-year-old KAWAI to the market to learn from him how to buy fresh seafood! He's a keen little boy - he prepared (from shopping, washing to cutting) everything for our hotpot dinner! Evening: I stayed behind later to chit-chat and hang out with Shirley's parents. They kept making me eat while I was so full already! Very special, Chinese hospitality. Night: Hung out with my cousins Joanna, Roy and Rick (while Herman ditched us because he had sore throat!) at a bar near Prince Edward called IT. Met Joanna's friends Annie and Margaret as well. Haha... I don't drink very often, so I first had was a Virgin Collada (nice coconut taste). Then the only little bit of alcohol I had was a Snowball (pineapple tasting) and a few sips of Carlsberg while all of them had like Tequilla Pot and other stuff that get them all buzzed! There was some 80's style band music there. We didn't leave until 3pm. Haha... the only so-called "night life" for me in Hong Kong! Dec 28, 2002 Saturday Lunch at Grandparents'. Business-exhange a second-hand laptop at Tsim Sha Tsui for a friend. Then I walked along the coastline in Tsim Sha Tsui facing the Victoria Harbour and took many pictures of the buildings of Hong Kong. But it was a misty day. It was not possible to take very clear photos. Back to grandparents' for dinner. Grandma made me my favourite Black Rice Coconut Dessert! Yummy! I even packed some home to drink the next few days. Dec 29, 2002 Sunday I realized suddenly my time in Hong Kong was running out. The first week of it was very distant and strange. The seond week of it has become warm and interpersonal as I went to church and also met different people who told me different stories. I went to my church in Tuen Mun, called "Castle Peak Baptist Church" for Sunday Worship. The Church had grown a lot in the past year. They have Reverend W.L. Chan there now a long with four other pastors. It's normal for people like me who only go to the church once a year to realize things like that. Went out to McDonald's next to St. Andrews in Jordan to meet up with Janice, a big sister from Diocesan Girls' School who I've known since Form 1. We had tea and a nice chat. Somehow, everytime, it's very brief, but I guess we both enjoyed staying in touch. Then went to Breakthrough Bookshop to shop around. I was very drawn to the MATCHMAN story and series. So I bought many Matchman gifts for my friends in Toronto. Matchman is such a timely response to the current difficult situation in Hong Kong. It reflects a possible positive response, yet reveal how much hope the people of hong kong are in need of righit now. Dinner at Grandparents' and took pictures with my relatives. It was basically the last time to see them before I flew again. Dec 30, 2002 Monday Day-out with KAWAI!! TO THE OCEAN PARK - a large amusement park on the Hong Kong Island facing the ocean literally with many thrilling rides and adventures and live sea animals like Sharks and fish aquariums. KAWAI preferred the aquariums and exhibitions much more than the rides. He went back to the acquarium two three times... for sure he's a boy who has a great memory for species names and features! We liked the PANDAs (ON ON and GAI GAI) too!! Wow, it was quite a day. I came home and slept in the next day! Dec 31, 2002 New Years Eve Home in the day with Dad. Watched him prepare food and cook. While he cooked for me and for the following day, we had a pleasant chat. My Dad shared some of his deeper thoughts about our families. I like that when we were sharing and listening but not criticizing or arguing. inner with Sally. Shopped around with her before I went home. I was very kind of her to spend time with me. My parents went out to do count-down party and mahjong with their high school friends. I stayed home on my own and had a quiet night. I didn't even turn on the TV. I tried to reflect on a whole year - but it was overwhelming. I didn't know where to start. It's interesting that I always live my whole year in Toronto where mostly everything happens there but spend my new years eve in Hong Kong. I wonder if this is kinda like my life-style... that disruptioni every year. Or lack of progress and continuity. It's been better though. Now I see myself staying for longer intervals in Toronto because of that. Jan 1, 2002 New Years Day Last day of my vacation in Hong Kong. After sleeping in, I joined my Dad who just pulled an all-nighter (what a teenager!) to barbeque near the Gold Coast Beach with his friends from his former workplace. Haven't seen them for a while. Now they are all into their 50's. Their kids are even my age, so they no longer show up in these events. I went on my own to take many pictures of the beaches and people. Then we all went to an Open Market and window-shopped around there. Bumped into my Aunt and Uncle (my Dad's elder sister and brother-in-law). Then, more pictures of lots of people flying kites and the sunset. Jan 2, 2002 Airport. Depart. Saying Bye to Hong Kong for a long while. Bye Mommy and Daddy. A brother from my church in Tuen Mun came to farewell. Then, it was quite a long ride. Departed from Hong Kong at 11:45am and arrived Chicago at 11:50am!! A 5minute" ride 'cause of time difference! Then went to Loretta's place on Bay St. around 5:30pm. |