FOOTPRINT

The official organ of the Abu Dhabi Island Hash House Harriers AUH4


Hashing is a state of mind- a friendship of kindred spirits joined together for the sole purpose of reliving their childhood or fraternity days, releasing the tensions of everyday life, and generally, acting a fool amongst others who will not judge you or measure you by anything more than your sense of humor."
Stray Dog (From the Global Trash Hash Bible complete reference for the Hash House Harriers)

AUH4 Run Number 1530
Monday 29th October 2007
The Half-a-Hash Run


The event:

The last time a run was held on the New Corniche, at the height of summer, it turned out to be a run so long that it was considered by all two hashes in one. This time it was half a hash.
As the pack set off, it soon became evident that the trail was at best scantly laid. Soon enough there were no markings, and after a good 45 minutes baffled groups of hashers appeared back at the Dolphin Fountain from the north, south, east and west starching their heads. Even the Hares Truffles and Humpty Dumpty appeared confused and didn’t know how they found their way back – and as it emerged because they had opted to set half the run each – only problem was it turned out they had both set the first half.
Nonetheless most, save a few Hash Brats who were never to be seen again and we applaud the Hares there, did find a way back to the fountain. They were to be greeted by a cheery Indian selling pussy of the feline - and not angry - variety.

It was then On-Back to the house of Perthy Throwup who was absent – probably more lost in the desert than the rest of the hash on the run that night.

To save us all a headache…if you’ve only opened Footprints for direction to next Mondays’ Hash, as per every week, they’re AT THE BLOODY BACK

Turnout
Approximately 50 Hashers and a few hash brats. Due to the absence of Angry Pussy, no Hash Dogs

Verdict
The first half was good, with plenty of chalk (at least for the first 100m)
The second half was at best shite.

HM – Big Ears
Hares
Truffles and Humpty Dumpty

Virgins
Laura-Lynne from a small cheese making community called Philadelphia. Here for three years so will hash again
Paul from Cambridge, here for two months and will hash again.
John and Sarah, both from Sunderland? Here for five days so very unlikely to hash again.

Leavers
Sebastian, who has got ‘stuff to do’ back in Sweden - namely hot chicks. He will however be willing to accept any visitors from the hash to join in the fun.

Hash Number and New Members
None! Hash is clearly in decline.

Returners
Jack’s Mum
Tin Tin
Liz (according to Olivia anyway)

RA – Big Poo
A rather sleepy Poo made the following charges:
Short Cutters – because there must have been a few with this number here
Carpet Burns
Terisa
Thunder down Under
GI Joe which was remarkable given he wasn’t even there
Leith and Rich
Dangerous Hashing
‘Ooz ‘Ee for playing chicken with trucks on Al Salam Street, and Pashmina because she was too busy on her phone to look after him.
Irish Morris for running blind – he didn’t call on-on because ‘he forgot his glasses’
Shane and How Much who withdrew AED38,000 from a cash point in Indonesia ‘for a taxi back’ (…sounds like bullshit to me…) - and in fact probably risking both a dangerous disease and the roth of their spouses.

Late Comers
R Hole
Paul
Geordy Dave and the two he brought along – Sarah and John

Other Charges
Sebastian for impersonating locals wearing a towel on his head
Ralph for skiving off early last week as he was scared he might get a down-down
Rich who, when questioned by Viagra Baby before the run as to why he was scratching his crotch told him that he wasn’t itchy, just a little bit stiff.
Please Finger Me for wearing a Mainland Hash T-Shirt and making Poo ill.
A Hash Brat for idolizing ‘No.5’ – which turned out to be Rich. The young fool.

Charges from the Floor
Sheila charged Wendy for trying to give the fore-mentioned Hash Brat beer and telling him ‘its only lemonade’
Truffles charged fellow Hare Humpty Dumpty for f***king up the run
Humpty Dumpty charged fellow Hare Truffles for marking the run in his car

And then Big Ears suggested a naming.
After being caught toying with his stinky winky, and as a play on his name, Rich was called in to be named
‘Itchy Dick’
Various other suggestions were made:
Instead of Rich, Poor Bastard
Itchy Dickie
Dick Head
Stiff Little Dick
Poor Little Itchy Dick
Cock
Etc, etc, etc

If was however unanimously voted that Rich should be named ‘Itchy Dick’ for all things Hash. Oh how the once idolized has fallen!

The Grub
Lots of lovely Curry

New run start time due to diminishing light: 1745 Hours

PLEASE:
let us know if you are planning to bring a virgin along
clean up after yourself at the on-back
please shut up during hash circle!

If you haven’t Hared any runs or hosted the Down-Downs, Teaboy, Georg with one E and Herman…probably best to speak to the latter as the only one of the three with any bloody hair…would like to talk to you. We all need to take our turns

Finally please note:
Some people have put their names down for Al Ain, but not paid - anyone not paid by close of (hash) business (normally the drinking bit) on Monday will be having their name removed from the list - so please pay up. We want to see you all, but not those who haven't paid…..

Social Dates for your Diary:

Friday 30th November 2007
Brunch at the Revolving Restaurant

Friday 13th December 2007
Hash Xmas Party, Venue confirmed as Whiplash’s Grotto

Events for your Diary:

AL AIN RE-HYDRATION RUN – 23rd to 24th November NTNH Site (2006), Al Ain, UAE. Please see Website for details. Whiplash is collecting money NOW

HASH BALL – with Mainland and Wasps at The Club – 17th January 2008
Further details to follow as an when…

WORLD INTERHASH – Perth 21st to 23rd March 2008
Please see Website for details

This week a contribution from Heather:
A cabbie picks up a Nun.
She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why he is staring.
He replies: 'I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you.'
She answers, 'My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.'
'Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.'
She responds, 'Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic.'
The cab driver is very excited and says, 'Yes, I'm single and Catholic!' 'OK' the nun says. 'Pull in to the next alley.'
The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.
But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
'My dear child,' says the nun, 'why are you crying?'
'Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.'
The nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.'

AUH4 Run Number 1532
Remember, Remember…the 5th of November 2007
Guy Fawkes Night so I want to see Fireworks!
START TIME: 1745 Hours
HARES: Tin Tin
LOCATION: was changed
ON BACK:

Don’t forget –
· Please recycle all cans – Perthy will take all cans back to assist their Harriss with an early return to Bangladesh – so please put all food scraps in a separate bag
· If you haven’t Hared any runs or hosted the Down downs Teaboy, Georg with one E and Herman would like to talk to you. We all need to take our turns
· Numbers have been climbing so if you are bringing Virgins along please let Hash Committee know as we would hate to be embarrassed by shortage of food and even worse run out of Hash Water



AUH4 WEBSITE
Don’t forget to look up the AUH4 website. Many thanks to Sheila for putting so much effort into a GREAT website - and check out any incriminating photos of yourself!!
Web site - where you are now
Click to be transported to photo site No longer accessible to anyone in the UAE! New Photo Site

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