FOOTPRINT
The official organ of the Abu Dhabi Island Hash House Harriers AUH4

Run 1499
THE “MEENA NO HASH WATER RUN ” RUN

Monday 26th March 2007
Hares: Tin Tin and Dune Basher
On Back: Meena breakwater

THE RUN
Well there we were all primed (but not oiled) and ready to roll, but alas - No Hash water – not even real water!!!! Kangaroo keg and Perthy Cuter were stuck in traffic with the necessary drinks. Unusually HRH Ooze EE and Pashmina were early which threw everyone out of order There were lots of yellow chalk marks and some flour with the chalk under the lights and arrows on the side of lights, lots of long false trails which even had the knitting circle in tow on several occasions until they became immediately lost and easy to find check back marks (well there were a lot of them) no crossing of any major roads, almost no soft sand, and only a few difficulties finding the arrows as the light began to fail (five minutes after we started). Cold wind, sudden edge drop offs, cocktail parties and Embassy villas

THE RUN – VERDICT
Best arrows ever 15/10– “too many rocks” +5; Chalk +2: Soft sand +5: Too much ocean: -4; Length just right 10: No wedding music: soft sand -3; it was too long; not enough mingling with the bimblers; too much ocean; bimblers got lost -6; too much chalk & flour; more whinging, moaning and grumbling for an excellent score of 9.31

THE HARES
Despite immense verbal pressure from several chatterboxes HM ‘Ooz ‘Ee got the gathering underway and gave down-downs to Perthy Throwup for suggesting that run 1499 was a good Aussie cricket score

VIRGINS
Stephanie, Barry and Ferdinand

THE GM
The GM Ooze EE had several charges
• Talking while the GM was attempting to speak Pashmina and Chris

THE VIRGIN RA - Perthy Throwup, proceeded to pick on numerous innocent Hashers

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Pashmina had a big birthday and Ooze Ee was to scared to tell all & sundry, so palmed it off to PT to announce. Pashmina was celebrating 21 and a bit, years old

WELCOME BACK
Matthew after a holiday in Oz

CHARGES
• Kangaroo keg and Perthy Cuter for getting lost in the traffic and being late with Hash water
In order to raise the standards of AUH4 the RA chose to address dress standards and Sex on the Hash
• DRESS STANDARDS - no Hash attire, Dan, James, Ralph, Carpet Burns, Rajeed,Romany, Stephanie, Karl, Truffles, Ida, Whiplash, Connal and Pashmina who was wearing a dead leopard
• Ralph for having the worlds longest email address
• OOZ ‘ee for long cutting again
• SEX ON THE HASH. Ken & Jenny who were at it all the night one must admire their stamina, Dr Ferrett for some smutty remarks then denying it, Elyaza “I need a massage”; Stephanie a virgin who left her clothing in someone’s car & she couldn’t remember who the man was; Vlad the Impaler for a premature ejection (on her bottle of bubbly); Karl who when asked where his wife was replied “too busy doing other things”
• Justin who forgot to go to the check-back and Dan who grassed on him & also forgot to tell him to go back
• The brats, Ferdinand, Connell and Shauna for wearing Ipods on Hash, grassing on each other several times, short cutting and cheating and for the sole parent Whiplash for not controlling them
• Wendy for finding the only hill in the harbour car park and riving over it with one wheel
• All Americans for being misguided and entering in the European song contest

SOCIAL EVENTS
The 1500th run on Friday 30th March April 20th a boat trip from somewhere to somewhere else from 2 to 5 pm, meeting at the Sheraton for lunch first

POLITICALLY IN CORRECT HUMOUR
A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused explains to the woman that they don't sell rectum deodorant, and never have.
Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from drug stores on a regular basis and would like some more.
"I'm sorry", says the pharmacist, "we don't have any"
"But I always buy it at drug stores," says the blonde.
"Do you have the container that it came in?" asks the pharmacist...
"YES", said the blonde, "I'll go home and get it.." She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to her "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant" Annoyed, the blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container...

"TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM."

NEXT WEEKS RUN - Run no. 1501:
Monday: 3rd April 2007
Hares: Sheila, Brian
Run – from the Canadian embassy 9th floor west building Abu Dhabi mall
On Back -at the Canadian embassy 9th floor west building

Don’t forget – Numbers have been climbing so if you are bringing Virgins along please let Hash committee know as we would hate to be embarrassed by shortage of food and even worse run out of Hash Water

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