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Beautiful Creatures
(Reviewed March 16, 2001)
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Even the delicious Rachel Weisz (best known as the eye-candy babe in "The Mummy") in a platinum wig playing a foxy, dim-witted mistress can't save this dull, dull, dull movie, which aspires to be "Blood Simple" but comes off as "Bloody Stupid." A pair of Scottish lassies attempt to clever their way out of a murder or two, but spend way too long staring into space and talking on the phone. This movie wants very badly to be one of those black-humor, clockwork-plotted film noirs of the type that the Coen Brothers and Guy Ritchie do so very well. It fails.
The most alarming thing about this movie isn't the gunplay and such. It's the credit at the end that says the film was partly financed by proceeds from Scotland's lottery...which goes to show that the American government isn't the only one that knows how to throw away money.
Back Row Grade: F
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