Issue 11
DOWNSIZING NEWS
                          November 2002
A truck rear-ended an Amish family's horse-drawn buggy Sunday, killing the mother and two children and injuring the father and one other child, state police said. While this is truly a tragedy, experts believe that the severity of the accident could have been avoided had the Amish family been driving a Sport Utility Buggy.
Amish Auto Accident
Bombing Geography
After months of questioning as to the reasoning behind the possible Iraq war effort, President Bush broke down and confessed that he was just getting sick of having to ask how to spell Afghanistan and Iraq was just a much easier word. In a related story, officials are warning of future U.S. attacks on any foreign powers of one syllable.
Bush Exaggerates Fishing Trip Story Before Congress, Nation
Just weeks after George W. Bush addressed the public concerning a pending war with Iraq, the President again steps into the spotlight by recount a recent fishing trip to the entire public. “I would say I caught a 15 pound Bass...read more

AOL Introduces Business Instant Messenger, Management Captures First Conversation

In what chat rooms are calling the most important innovation since the Episode II DVD earlier this month, Internet giant America Online has introduced Business IM, targeting large corporations desiring faster communication...read more

The Management Introduces Weekly Television Show

Tune in to KVR-TV in Austin, TX to catch The Management on Television. So far, Episodes 1-3 have been shot and will be airing weekly, and 5 more should be coming soon...read more
Mentally Ill Man to be sent to Electric Chair, Told Going to Carnival
next Thursday. Goldman has been clinically diagnosed with chronic schizophrenia along with Down syndrome and that thing that Michael J. Fox has...read more
James Goldman, a 36 year death-row inmate and mentally ill man, is scheduled to be executed via the electric chair
The Management Broadcasts Weekly Radio Program Across Air-Waves and Internet
Listen in on 91.7 FM in Austin, TX every Wednesday evening from 7:00 to 7:30 PM or tune in via the internet at kvrx.org to catch the latest...read more
Homeless Man Working at University Bookstore Requests to Keep Change
University of Texas Linguistics major Ronald Morgan was taken aback when Bookstore employee and homeless drifter David Colborn asked if he could spare the change...read more