The Crass Menagerie

#100 - The Final Issue (Part Five)

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This Ain't Oprah - Interview with Chris Dodge of Slap A Ham Records and Spazz, Stikky, No Use For A Name, Burn Your Bridges...

Interview by: Jeb

I’ve done more than a few interviews with Chris over the years. This one is the best yet.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Tell me about the demise of SAH.

CHRIS DODGE: Well, it boils down to a simple equation really... Too many debts plus hardly any money coming in plus more work than any job I've ever had equals no more label. It's been a long time coming, but early this year I finally came to the grim realization that Slap A Ham needed to be prematurely put out to pasture. Actually I'm not bummed about it. I love the label, but it's a relief to see it go in many ways. Mostly I won't miss the feeling of constant obligation and the always-open trapdoor in my bank account. My last release ever for the label was OTOPHOBIA's "Malignant" CD. Fortunately, I found good homes on other labels for all of my other upcoming releases... the SHANK album will be on 625 and Deep Six, CONGA FURY album will be on Six Weeks, IRON LUNG album will be on 625, LANA DAGALES album will be on Boredom Noise. So everyone is taken care of. I'm going to sell off the remaining back catalog, but I currently have no plans to repress any of the old titles.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Considering Slap A Ham as a whole, what are you most proud of?

CHRIS DODGE: Probably the fact that I was able to give a bit of a "leg up" to some struggling bands who might not have otherwise had a chance. Like Capitalist Casualties. I used to see them all the time around '87 or '88 and they were one of my favorite bands, but for some reason I felt like I was the only one who realized how awesome they were. They released several demos but couldn't find a single label to help them release vinyl... no one even put 'em on comps! I started the label in '89. C.C. was a struggling but still ass-kickin' band, so around '91 I released the first C.C. 7". I couldn't believe that an amazing band like that who had already been around for 5 years couldn't find a single label to release their stuff, but someone had to step up the plate, so it might as well be me. But I'm glad that they are now rightfully in the hierarchy of political thrash legends. Same with a band like No Comment. I was listening to their first demo for several years before I actually met them and I was incredulous that nobody wanted to help them put out any releases. These are fucking classic bands! I'm not taking credit for them, the bands are responsible for the music not me, but the thing I am proud of is that I was able to be part of helping to put out some of my all-time favorite hardcore tunes.

CRASS MENAGERIE: If you could go back, what would you do differently?

CHRIS DODGE: There's a few releases I'm not too happy with in retrospect, but in general I'm happy with the whole Slap A Ham discography. I made a lot of bad "business" decisions over the years, but I have an artistic temperament and not a business temperament. And since I was doing the label for artistic and not business reasons, I reckon that would make sense. Honestly, the part that's been slightly disheartening is that after 13 years of struggling on something that's a labor of love, I can go into most record stores and when I mention Slap A Ham, more often than not, they'll have absolutely NO idea what I'm talking about. Ha ha. Oh well...

CRASS MENAGERIE: If you won ten million dollars tomorrow would you keep doing Slap A Ham or would that be your ticket away from all this?

CHRIS DODGE: Hmmm, I would be tempted to do both... go insanely overboard with the label, or avoid it entirely and live in the Bahamas. Hard to say. The best thing about still doing the label would be that I wouldn't have to "pick and choose" which bands to work with due to monetary restrictions; I could just help out every great band I heard. But knowing me, even if I had ten million dollars and could afford to have a huge staff of people do all of the grunt-work for me, I'd probably still want to do it all myself.

CRASS MENAGERIE: What is behind the name Slap A Ham? I'm sure it's a question you've been asked a million times but I've had lots of people ask me it and they think it's weird that I don't know, since I am such a big fan, so I thought I would ask...

CHRIS DODGE: Well, I've been evasive about the real meaning since Day One, but no better time than during the eulogy to finally give a straight answer about it... I have this old friend named Walter Glaser, the same guy who used to write reviews for MRR "back in the day", the same guy who is making the goony face on the cover of the MRR "Turn It Around" 2x7" compilation... anyhow, he's a complete goofball and used to run around Gilman saying random silly things like "Slap your ham" or "Toss your salad" or "Filet your tubesteak"... they were basically all ridiculous euphemisms for masturbation. Around 1988 I knew I wanted to try doing a record label; David Hayes was still with Lookout at the time (he was co-founder along with Lawrence), and he was assembling "The Thing That Ate Floyd" compilation album. He offered to print an ad for my upcoming label in the booklet of the comp. Well the deadline for the ad came and I still didn't have a name for the label, so in a state of panic I grasped at the first thing that came to mind; and thus, I thought of Walter's ridiculous phrases, and "Slap A Ham" was born. I figured it was odd enough for people to remember immediately. Plus I thought that if people actually cared about my label someday, how funny it would be if some of the world's most brutal bands were vying to be on a label called something as absurd as Slap A Ham. One of those myriad little ironies that I like to amuse myself with that other people either don't get or don't care about because it's so dumb in the first place. In retrospect, it certainly wouldn't be my first (or even tenth) choice for a label name, but it's a bit too late for that, eh?

CRASS MENAGERIE: I always assumed it was a euphemism for masturbating, but wasn't sure, and never asked. Although I've always told you that your one-time side label "Raging Woody Records" should have been your first label name since you have to have a raging woody before you can slap your ham. I don't suppose you have a good story for coming up with Raging Woody Records as a name? You're just not good at this picking label names thing, are you?

CHRIS DODGE: That pretty much sums it up. Not good at label names. The funny thing is I never really liked the names Slap A Ham or Raging Woody. They just manifested from a of lack of other ideas... so I just went the "dumb guy" route I guess. Anyhow, Raging Woody was a side-label I created for the Old Joe Clarks, who were a country folk band. The main guy in this band was Mike Coykendall who played banjo on some Spazz songs. I really loved these guys and I wanted to help them get some releases out. But I knew if I released it on Slap A Ham I would basically ruin everything I had established because in the future nobody would trust me with bands they had never heard before, y'know? I'd screw up the Slap A Ham sound. I wanted to create a side label that alluded to Slap A Ham, but also sounded like a folk band could be on it. We were all huge Woody Guthrie fans, so I came up with the ever ingenious Raging Woody, a reference to both Slap A Ham and Woody Guthrie. And thus... it was a complete flop. Oh well. I've still got quite a few copies.... been using 'em to prop up wobbly furniture around the house.

CRASS MENAGERIE: What are some records that you wished had been released on Slap A Ham that weren't... besides the XTC catalog...?

The stuff that I wish the most that I had released were records that have never come to fruition at all (not even on other labels). Like the solo release by Trey Spruance (Mr. Bungle / Secret Chiefs 3). He recorded this amazing tape of Naked City-esque tunes that were fast and complex and totally unpredictable and just brilliant... it was a while back, maybe '92 or '93 I'm guessing. The stuff was amazing and we talked on and off over many many years about his tunes coming out on Slap A Ham, but the material was never finished and remains shelved on a dusty cassette somewhere. I was supposed to do a Carcass 7" but that never happened. I was also supposed to do a 7" with this incredible all-female Japanese thrash band called Crusade. They released two demos back around 1990. I think they broke up right after I offered to do the record, because I never heard anything about them after that. They never released anything. I think everybody remembers the No Comment 7"; it's my personal favorite in the Slap A Ham discography. However, what I originally asked No Comment to do was an LP. They agreed to do an album initially and I was really excited to hear what they would come up with. But by the time they recorded, Andy called me and said "Well, we recorded all of the new stuff and it's only six minutes long". A bit short for an LP, y'know, so it became the "Downsided" 7". To me, that's a bonafide classic record, but the original idea for an LP, that's what I really wish could have been released on Slap A Ham if I had to pick one thing, only because I know it would have been one of THE best hardcore albums ever. As an aside from your question, a lot of people would be stunned at some of the stuff I've actually turned down over the years. I always had legitimate reasons though...

CRASS MENAGERIE: Like what have you turned down... that's a long list... what have you turned down that you shouldn't have?

CHRIS DODGE: Oh, you're gonna force me to name names, eh? Well, OK, screw it. However, unlike your question, this is not a list of "stuff I turned down that I shouldn't have"... It's "stuff I turned down for my own reasons even though I knew it would probably sell but I didn't think Slap A Ham was the right home for it for one reason or another". I've always been fully conscious of what I'm releasing and not releasing, whether it's "popular" or not. It's never been a case of "Oh damn, I let that get away" because I don't have that competitive streak. Well, I'll never remember 'em all, but off the top of my head for starters there's: Discordance Axis first split 7" and last album, The Locust 1st 7", Cathedral 1st 7", Agoraphobic Nosebleed first 7", Protes Bengt discography LP, Raw Power, Atomsmasher CD, Dystopia debut release... you get the idea. There's a ton more, but after 13 years it's impossible to recall them all in 5 minutes.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Tell me about your new bands. What are they like musically? Any recordings in the works? Any juicy gossip?

CHRIS DODGE: As of now, there's a lot of stuff I've got cookin' that's not finished and still in the embryonic stages. I've got a new band I'm doing with Bob from Lack Of Interest. Just a two man hardcore band, guitar and drums. We keep changing the name, but as of this writing it's Burn Your Bridges. We have about 45 songs so far but no releases, so that's what we're currently trying to remedy. 36 songs are recorded without vox. Once vox are done (I'm dragging my feet on lyrics) we can start cranking out some records. It's pretty much straight forward hardcore, dare I say with an early 80s edge to it, but we're not going for the youth crew or fastcore thing. Not like we're breaking the boundaries of originality, just hammering out some fast tunes that make us both happy. I've been making music and noise here and there with Etay from Lana Dagales too, but a lot less frequently. Our schedules conflict a lot so meeting up is tough to coordinate. We've got some raw recordings of some cool tunes. Maybe something like a mix of early Italian hardcore and Melt-Banana. I dunno.

I'm still doing noise under the name Jesus Philbin. Got some vinyl and comp appearances on the way. Also the long-awaited collaboration with Bastard Noise is in the opening stages. I've got a few "solo" projects brewing, too. One is a split CD with Solmania due out on a French label called Even Stilte. And also a split 7" with The Bumbling Detective (Bill Sannwald) that Bill is going to release himself.

Plus I'm in the planning stages with Dave Witte to record two new albums under the name East West Blast Test. One album will be on Ipecac, one on Relapse. I'm sure some dirtbags will give me heat about "selling out", but they've gotta be fucking high to think that's what it's about. I've never done anything solely to please other people and I'm obviously still not doing it now. Think about it.

To top it all off, I've started a Hawaiian band with my wife Lydia. And also with Lydia, over the course of 4 years, Ancient Chinese Secret has finally amassed a bit of a cult following, so ACS might be reborn in one form or another soon.

CRASS MENAGERIE: What is the best song you've ever written and what are the best lyrics you've ever written?

CHRIS DODGE: Lordy, what a question. As far as music, it's really difficult for me to pick something looking back thru old releases... the big problem is I'm hyper-critical of my own stuff (as I'm sure anybody who has consistently written songs is). Basically, once I record something and listen to it a few times, I'm concentrating on whatever the newest songs are that I'm working on. And in my mind, the newest (unrecorded) stuff is always the best. Then by the time that's recorded, it's already old hat for me because I'm working on another new batch of songs. And so the cycle perpetuates itself. And so I continue to evade the question. What it boils down to is I'm my own worst critic and I usually don't like most of my own material by the time it's released because I've always got something new and in my mind the newest stuff is always the best.

As for lyrics, I won't bother with most of the Spazz ones because most of the time those were self-referential (among the three of us) and were based on people and situations that only we knew about most of the time. Some were good and had a definite message and purpose to them, but quite a few were completely off the wall, and some were just plain crap. I think my personal strength has always been music and not lyrics anyhow. But maybe some of the Stikky songs I wrote still have some of my favorite lyrics... songs like "Mr. Meanie" which is one that folks still quote back to me, so I guess that's a good sign. "Mr. Meanie" was basically stripping down the tough guy facade of troublemakers at shows and making it sound like a childhood primer of sorts. The lyrics to "Cheese Is Fantastic" were good, too, I think. It summarized well all of our thoughts on the late 80's youth crew straight edge movement. The obvious message was basically sXe is cool, but show some originality and quit acting and dressing like a bunch of bald clones. Of course, a lot of sXe kids took the lyrics at surface value and got pissed off at us, which made it even more funny because it's a pro-sXe song if you really read it. We got called "traitors" (even though we never claimed to be sXe ourselves; maybe because we played with Youth Of Today a few times? I dunno) and kids from bands like Unit Pride and Breakaway actually tried to stop people from moshing at some of our shows (some of those folks were former friends, too... how straight edge is THAT? "Stabbed In The Back"! Ha ha!). Just a few months ago some guy sent me a copy of his college term paper wherein he gave deep critical analysis to the lyrics of "Cheese Is Fantastic". And I'm not kidding!

CRASS MENAGERIE: So SPAZZ has been broken up going on two years now, do you miss it?

CHRIS DODGE: No, not at all. Don't get me wrong, I'm not "anti", it's just that SPAZZ had its time and place and now it's over. Not a big deal. It just "is"... very zen, huh? It was fun to do when we were doing it, but if we kept doing it any longer we would have just continued to put out the same records year after year. I think musically we took it as far as we could go without changing styles or regurgitating the same material. I think we were able to keep the same sound and spirit over the years with enough subtle twists and turns and progressions in the songs to keep it interesting with each release. But I think we took it as far as we could while still keeping the impact

intact.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Do you think that the "Sweatin' 3: Skatin', Satan, and Katon" CD will truly be the final chapter for SPAZZ? Do you have anything else waiting in the wings?

I don't think there will be a volume 4, but who knows. I know for years Max has talked about wanting to do some live release or something, but I have a feeling there's not much motivation to go thru all of the tapes and sort out something that flows well and has good enough consistent sound quality. Max has a ton of videos, too; a SPAZZ video compilation is another idea that's

occasionally been kicked around. But if that happened it would have to be his baby, cuz I probably haven't seen 95% of the videos... I don't like to watch myself. (NOTE FROM JEB: This interview was done before the new SPAZZ 7" came out. Chris knew about it but was keeping it secret. Schmucker. Read the "Newzz" section in part one of this issue for more info on that 7")

CRASS MENAGERIE: Just looking where many of the tracks on Sweatin' 3 came from it reminds me how many split 7"ers Spazz did... on what basis did you choose which bands to do splits with and which bands to tell "No"?

CHRIS DODGE: Most of the time it was just bands that we were friends with and wanted to do splits with. Sometimes the label had an idea for a split with a band we really liked and we would agree. But at a certain point we had to say "no" to just about everything because I was literally getting letters and emails every week from tons of bands basically saying "Hey, you guys do splits with everybody, so you need to do a split with my band that you've never heard, so go ahead and send us your songs now." It was getting a bit comical. There's one important lesson I've learned over the years, especially in regards to all of those offers to do splits, and that is: NEVER SAY "MAYBE". When I say "maybe", it's staggering how many people take that to mean "YES DEFINITELY". I would say "maybe" if we were maybe somewhat interested in maybe the possibility maybe sometime down the road of maybe doing a release... but then too many kids would start putting out ads and making plans for some record that we never confirmed, and then blame us when the record (that we never agreed to do in the first place) never came out. Just a big annoying pain in the ass really.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Speaking of splits. Did the SPAZZ / 25 TA LIFE split ever get fully released? I know a few leaked out here and there but recently I heard that Edison Records and Very Distro were still sitting on most of them. If true, that is total b.s.!

CHRIS DODGE: Hell if I know. I doubt I'll ever know the real story on that one. There were supposed to be something like 4000 copies made, and some were going to have different covers and different vinyl colors and other cool stuff. Instead, after about 2 years, a handful leaked out here and there... nobody could find it and all of the copies had different "rough" covers because the "real" covers were "still being printed". Regardless of whose fault it is that the record never got around, everybody lost on that one... except the few people who got copies and sold 'em on Ebay, that is. I heard a few weeks ago that this split just got bootlegged in Europe. Oh well. At least some folks will hear it now.

CRASS MENAGERIE: What was it about the band that demanded so much attention? SPAZZ is arguably the most popular power violence band ever.

CHRIS DODGE: I'm not 100% sure. Maybe the timing was right and enough people were ready to hear that style of music we were doing at that point in time... there was definitely a "flavor of the month" aspect to the surge of the kids who got into our stuff around '97... a lot of those same kids aren't around anymore nowadays... surprise, surprise. I think we wrote some good tunes, added hints of variety to keep it a little bit fresh (like the banjo tunes), the use of lots of samples, and probably some of the pop culture imagery with the skating and Hong Kong flicks and wrestlers and such made it a bit different at the time. For some reason, that combo of everything appealed to a wider range of folks than the average HC band.

CRASS MENAGERIE: For years you and the other members of the band were pretty vocal about how much you disliked the early SPAZZ recordings but towards the end I heard both you and Max say you now like them. Are you just fickle bastards, or what?

CHRIS DODGE: I got into that before, but yeah, "fickle bastards" probably sums it up. Once any of my music is released, I pretty much never listen to it again. For instance, you're referring to the early SPAZZ releases.... for years and years I didn't listen to 'em at all and I just had this mindset of "all of that stuff sucks and I don't want to hear it". Then recently I heard a bunch of the old recordings and I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed it. Seriously, after avoiding that material for so long, then hearing it again for the first time several years later gave me a feeling of discovering it all over again. Kinda cool for me to not think all of my previous songs suck (only some of 'em). But seriously, I think giving myself that "distance" from my material, helps me appreciate it more down the road. Maybe that doesn't make any sense at all, but what can I say, that's how my

brain is wired.

CRASS MENAGERIE: What are the best and worst records SPAZZ ever released?

CHRIS DODGE: Best in my book are the split 7" with Toast and probably the "Crush Kill Destroy" album, although I still think the mix on the latter was a bit lackluster. I'd love to remix "C.K.D." so it has more of the sonic impact of "La Revancha". Worst? Several of the early releases, like our sides of the splits with Rupture and Charles Bronson. The split with Black Army Jacket sucks because 3 of the 5 songs are covers, and I hated all of the covers we did, mostly because they were all just straight covers. Honestly, I hate doing straight covers in general. Why listen to a half-baked cover version when you can just listen to the original version that's always superior anyhow?

CRASS MENAGERIE: Is it true your farewell show broke the all time attendance record at Gilman St.? When you show up for a show like that and you see a line wrapped halfway around the block how does it make you feel? Don't think of this as an emo question, more of a deep psychological probing... Which is better than a lot of other deep probing you can get!

CHRIS DODGE: I don't know "official" Gilman stats, but I'm pretty sure it did break the attendance record. I've gone to Gilman since it first opened in '87 and in the past I never saw a line that long that literally made it past the end of the block. It gave me a very humbling feeling that people would be that dedicated to come see our barely-talented hardcore band thrash about and play most of our songs wrong. I loved seeing so many friends and cool folks who traveled literally from all over the world, that was the true highlight of the evening, but I hated the selfishness of everyone on stage with cameras who felt compelled to block everyone else's views because their stupid ass videos were so important. Honestly, that put me in a bit of a bad mood. By the time we were setting up to play, I had a massive headache and I wasn't enjoying it at all. It was all a bit anti-climactic for me, but I suppose it went well considering...

CRASS MENAGERIE: Along these same lines... punk rock in general and hardcore in particular is not supposed to have any hang ups with the idea of "celebrity" but in many ways that is total crap. To some extent you have that status. You have people ask you for autographs, you have people get nervous when they talk to you, people write you fan mail, there was an online discussion group dedicated to you, stuff like that. Part of that status means people are giving undue weight to what you say and think. Do you have any obligation to take that into consideration when speaking your mind or writing lyrics or whatever?

CHRIS DODGE: As we all know, punk rock and hardcore is based on the ideology of "no rock stars". But therefore, if there are no rock stars, that means "no fans" as well; after all, fans are what make an ordinary person a "celebrity". Given that, take a look around at the scene and it's obvious that hardcore revolves almost solely on nothing but intense and rabid fandom and fanaticism. If it didn't, then you wouldn't have a worldwide network of people helping penniless bands tour the planet, or record labels dedicated solely to releasing the music of largely unknown bands, or fanzines that interview and review and promote the vast array of music and politics and ideas that are under the radar of the mainstream. It's simple: The more visible and active you are, then the more your name gets around, and as a result of greater exposure, you receive more feedback from those who appreciate or draw influence from what you're doing. In other words, you become a celebrity, no matter how minor; although the word "celebrity" is taboo in underground circles, as we know, that's basically what it is. A lot of the more well-known underground types are uncomfortable with this status, and some of them like it but pretend that they don't because that helps keep their punk values in check... but I think phony self-deprecation is almost as annoying as outright arrogance. I'm guilty of it myself. But that's called punk rock, man. Work really hard to do something that you want to do and hopefully others will appreciate it, too, but once you finally get recognition you need to immediately pretend you don't want it. Whatever. One of the many ludicrous hypocracies of punk, but that's another story... I don't take any sort of obligation into consideration when I speak my mind or write lyrics because it's all simply one man's opinion and output. I believe everyone is guided by their own free will and make choices that are solely of their own making. I do try to avoid adding to the crap and ugliness in the world as much as possible, just because that's the type of person I am, but anything I say can be interpreted to fit anyone's own definition of choice, good or bad. I can't be held responsible of someone interprets something of mine in a manner I didn't intend. Free will. We all have it. But most people just don't want to take personal responsibility for their own choices and actions and would rather find a scapegoat. Quite frankly, that's bullshit.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Looking back, would you have done anything differently with SPAZZ?

CHRIS DODGE: I'm sure I could come up with a lot of stuff, but primarily I'd say "quality control". Especially when we really got rolling a few years into it... we were recording every two months and nearly had our own record-of-the-month club. Most of the time we would record everything we wrote, and we used everything that was recorded to fulfill our myriad obligations. As a result of the pressure to crank out material, we didn't axe some of the weaker songs and outright clunkers that in retrospect probably should have never been released.

CRASS MENAGERIE: For you what are some highlights of your time in SPAZZ?

CHRIS DODGE: Probably certain live shows, especially the U.S. and Japan tours. I'm glad we got to take it as far as we did and I'm glad that more people than just the three of us enjoyed the tunes.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Now for my "Teen Beat" question... Where do you get all your snazzy shirts? Chris Dodge and his shirts are almost as famous as Rick Nielsen and his guitars or Leon Wilkesen and his hats.

CHRIS DODGE: Well, it would be nice to say I have a supplier, but they were just ones I stumbled upon in various used clothing stores. I'm a much less wacky dresser as of late, but some of the loud shirts still make special appearances once in a while. Then again, I'm trying to start a Hawaiian band now, so if I get that off the ground, I'm warning you in advance about my attire.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Have you ever worn the Viagra tie I gave you? Y'know I sold one of those on eBay for a small fortune...

CHRIS DODGE: What's it called? Viagra? Heck, I don't even know what that is *cough cough*. Well, I have worn it... just not in public. A small fortune, you say? I could use a small fortune right about now....

CRASS MENAGERIE: Well... very, very small fortune, I should say... Do you believe that the vast array of pissed off American subcultures like punk, metal and hip hop, really have an impact on mainstream society or are they to be used strictly for personal power and enjoyment by the fans?

CHRIS DODGE: I don't think there's a direct impact on mainstream society, but what's underground today likely will not be in another 5 - 7 years once the mainstream takes hold of what's really cool and homogenizes it to the point that it's completely different from it's roots... a bit more palatable for mass consumption, if you will. But by then, the underground will be at a different level anyhow, so in my opinion the mainstream can have the underground's leftovers. For instance, when I got into punk, it was such a struggle to find HC records, shirts, zines, and such. It was all very sparse, obscure, and specialized to the point that it was nearly impossible to track most of the stuff down. I would have never guessed in a million years that by the 90s, I'd be able to go into any shopping mall in America and easily purchase a Black Flag shirt, or a Dead Kennedys patch, or a punk fanzine at Hot Topic... let alone things like the Warped Tour - punk rock played for tens of thousands of kids in a stadium, instead of for 30 kids in some crappy rented hall. It's really staggering to compare the two and realize they have the same roots. Same is true for underground metal... in the mid-80s did anyone really think Slayer would be headlining stadiums someday? Same for underground rap / hip hop culture. Even though it's a watered down version, both musically and ideologically, the underground influence eventually bubbles to the surface. Mainstream punk, metal, hip hop, ska, electronica, etc. are all the Pat Boone "vanilla" versions of what these scenes were originally based on.

CRASS MENAGERIE: There is a popular, and annoying, trend in hardcore right now of releasing "collector only" versions of records and/or bands on the record-a-month release schedule. Do you think SPAZZ' prolific and collectable output in the early years contributed to this trend?

CHRIS DODGE: We certainly didn't invent it, but we put out so much stuff, I'm sure we helped contribute to the problem to some degree. Oh well. That's what collecting is all about. If you just want the tunes, you get the regular version. If you're a nerd, you hunt for the limited version. That's what makes record collecting fun. I'm not a collector, but I used to be many years ago and that was always the best part of it, finally getting your hands on something really unique and rare. I don't think there's anything wrong with limited versions of releases, just as long as the music is widely available enough for the Average Joe to have a chance to hear it... unless staying deliberately obscure your goal. Some folks are strange that way, they think that selling more than 500 copies of a record is "selling out". What's the point of releasing records that nobody will hear? That's so laughably absurd.

CRASS MENAGERIE: Any last thoughts?

CHRIS DODGE: This is the longest I've ever spent on any interview and I'm pooped. I need a nap. And maybe some Geritol since I'm 33 (many consider that senior citizen age in punk rock years, you know). Congrats on Crass Menagerie #100 Jeb! You could use a nap yourself, Old Timer... especially with all of those youngins you got runnin' 'round!

Write me at:

CHRIS DODGE

P.O. BOX 7337

ALHAMBRA, CA 91802-7337

U.S.A.

www.slapaham.com dodge@slapaham.com

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An essay about SLAP A HAM RECORDS written by Andy Shank

NOTE FROM JEB: Andy is going to kill me for running this. It was originally written for this issue before Chris announced Slap A Ham was ending and before SHANK’s album was moved from Slap A Ham to 625 and Deep Six. So some of what this essay says isn’t exactly accurate anymore, and Andy is not real keen on stuff that has lost relevancy. My feelings, however, are that this has NOT lost any relevancy. The SHANK album will forever have a SAH catalog number (check the SAH web site) and in some ways it will be totally unique in that it was the only SAH catalog release to not be pressed by SAH. I think what Andy wrote is wonderful and I just didn’t feel like I could send off issue #100 without including it. It is the perfect way to end this tribute to SAH. (Besides I’m bigger than Andy, so I can take him..)

Andy vs. The King Of Power Violence

by Andy Nolan

I can't remember when I first became aware of Slap a Ham's existence, the Raised Ignorant, Downsided, Crossed Out/ MITB, Lack Of Interest/ Slavestate and Iaborher 7"s all found their way into my collection within it a short space of each other and the If You Quit You'd Still Have Nothing poster confused visiting euro-crusties in our front room for a long time.

I've always lived in places with tiny scenes that focused on the worst aspects of punk rock and hardcore, both musically and ethically and Slap a Ham certainly spearheaded my retreat into a different world. A world where politics, if there were any, were less full of shit, where covers were more likely to have art stolen from kung fu films or books on freakshows (interests of mine that time) than tired old pictures of war and famine (though Chris has put out a more than his fair share of those as well). A place where the guitars didn't stop half way through so the singer could do a lengthy and directionless rant about animals in slaughter houses or singing about being stabbed in the fucking back (and we still haven't got over either of those cliches, cliches that were stupid even when I got into the scene). And let's not even touch on what passed for grindcore in the early nineties shall we?

I've said this countless times before in interviews, but it still remains fresh in my memory: Being at a gig in Bradford and finding the Downsided 7" in the distro box and no one else cared, they all wanted the latest faceless crap in a manilla envelope record. Being in Manchester and everyone else scrabbling for bad German D beat "wictims of the war" crap, whilst I found the only MITB/ Crossed Out 7" and wondered why no one else gave a fuck. Clueless, all of them. And then five years after the fact they all want to trade their third rate emo schmemo records for my first Spazz 7", for about six minutes anyway, remember when e bay was full of clowns trying to punt 'rare' power violence records for inflated prices to mop tops?

Fun nights in when I lived with Jonathan from Minute Manifesto and we'd sing along with Stikky and then put on Dwarf Jester Rising and do the "lethal lethal lethal" chorus in whatever the hell it was called, I can't remember my own song titles, let alone anyone elses, putting on the silliest voics we could. Now me and Jamie from Shank drink to Lack Of Interest and see if we can do that "UUUUURRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!" for as long as that guy can.

And now I have a record on that label. It's funny, i'm just some dumb guy living in Scotland with limited access to decent bands, music and (most importantly) people. I could write a fanzine full of dumb questions we get asked about our association from earnest Euro-punx, from the usual "how did you end up on slap a ham?" blah to "your record will be a lot of money to buy and not DIY [beats me], why have you sold out?" crap that you know they wouldn't ask an American band on Slap a Ham.

Another favourite is that they ask us about politics, how come, if we're so outspoken as a band (and I still don't see that we are) we're associating with The King Of Power Violence, the guy who made lyrics about something disappear from the scene, made everyone sing about kung fu? I'm still surrounded by idiots it would appear.

It's like this, two people I consider good friends in this scene and who are exceptionally smart and considered in their opinions happen to be Chris Dodge and Max Ward, the guys that ruined the scene. I've had conversations with the pair of them that stand out as saying a lot more than a whole distro box full of third rate Profane Existence-esque kack ever could. But then politics starts and ends with your lyric sheet I guess.

But it seems that in this part of the world to a lot of people, they have a strange way of dealing with our relationship with some guy in another country with a thing for elves. I could name at least three people who are good friends of mine in the scene over here that will only ever mention our affiliation to Slap a Ham if it's an attack on us.

I was staying in SF and suppressed a laugh when I ran into two of the great international unwashed in the street that knew my girlfriend, they didn't know where we were staying, but the conversation took this turn "I saw Chris Dodge getting into a car the other day looking like a business man" "dude, Chris Dodge is a fuckin' business man". I bet they even had 'Dude' and 'Sweet' tattooed on their backs.

Where's this going? Chris Dodge needs to get a leather jacket and write Shitlickers on it, that's where.

So, in summing up, as sure as the sixty one tattoo I'm getting means, we're on Slap a Ham and you're not, so fuck you.

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Thanks to all the sponsors over the years. I’ll miss taking your money... Hee hee. I’ll still take your free records if they are bogging you down...

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SPONSOR - ROUND FLAT RECORDS

Round Flat Records web site: http://www.roundflat.com Round Flat is one of the world's biggest and best underground music distributors. They have over 9000 albums, shirts, and other goodies. A completely searchable and secure site with ordering capabilities over the web or via regular mail. They are fast, reliable, and easy to work with. Free catalogs available through snail mail, too.

After you visit their website, get on the mailing list and take part in the rare record auctions. Write roundflat@roundflat.com *********************************************************************

SPONSOR - SLAP A HAM RECORDS

Slap A Ham Records web site: http://www.slapaham.com Slap A Ham Records is the only label that knows Victoria's secret. Not to mention they have some great music for you! The world's premiere extreme hardcore label.

The current roster includes: OTOPHOBIA, YACOPSAE, CHRIS DODGE/DAVE WITTE, HELLNATION, CROSSED OUT, GASP, BURNING WITCH, PHOBIA, F.O.B., ANCIENT CHINESE SECRET, LACK OF INTEREST, SPAZZ, and more!

Slap A Ham now accepts credit cards! Hop over to their website for all the details.

Slap A Ham (catalog@slapaham.com)

P.O. Box 7337

Alhambra, CA 91802-7337

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