In the beginning...

The experience of having Evan can not be fully appreciated without knowing the events that led up to his birth.   We feel very blessed to have Evan, and we must say it's been an emotional rollercoaster.

January 10-17, 1998

Liz and I took a week off from our busy schedules to drive through Yosemite, stay at our Uncle Nick's cabin in Truckee, then join my brother-in-law's family for a few days in Las Vegas.  It seems the events that occurred during this wonderful week led to Evan being with us today. It's amazing what games can be played in a cabin in Truckee!

February 14, 1998 (Valentine's Day)

Confirmation.  Now I know why they (EPT) give you two tests in those kits.  Sure enough, Evan's on his way!

The Tests

After our initial pre-natal check-up at Lucile Salter Packard Children's Hospital at Stanford, we decided to take an AFP (alpha protein test)--a blood test.   This is a blood test  to find out if the baby might have problems, such as Down syndrome or  spina bifida.  Timing of when to take this test is very important, since there is only a two week period of time when these tests are accurate.  It is most accurate between the 16-18th week. 

The test results indicated a screen positive for Down syndrome.   Needless to say, Liz and I were devastated.  We were then told we needed to attend genetic counseling, along with a followup ultrasound to confirm if the test was taken at the correct time.  During this time, all I could think of is parents who have healthy children don't realize just how lucky they are.

During the genetic counseling, we were told that if the test was accurate, there is a 10% chance that our baby would have Down syndrome.  We were also told that we were still early enough in the pregnancy that we could abort with little complications.   Liz was determined that no matter what happens and what may be wrong, we would keep the baby. 

During our ultrasound appointment, we were told that the baby's due date was early by 3 weeks, which would make the AFP test invalid.  We were relieved, but did not opt to retake the test.  This was enough of an emotional drain for now.  Plus, if the test again turned positive, there was nothing we could do except think about it for the next 6 months until the baby was born.   

We had another ultrasound appointment about a month later.  Liz and I wanted to keep our baby's gender a surprise, which it was when the baby was born.  But during this ultrasound, it was determined that Liz had a condition known as placenta previa.

The doctors were hoping that this condition would disappear by the time Liz is ready to deliver, but it didn't.  As a result, Liz was forced to stay home during her seventh month.  Talk about stir-crazy!  Liz did some activities to keep herself busy, such as making a quilt, read books, played countless games of solitiare (she likes the real thing better than the computer), and e-mailing.   She entered contest that she ran across on the web, one of which was KGO's contest they were running in San Francisco.  She e-mailed every day for 6 weeks straight.  This determination won us free tickets to see Miss Saigon in San Francisco.

LABOR  DAY

During a routine check-up on September 4, Liz complained of feeling some contractions during the week.   Dr. Scott Osterling felt that contractions could lead to bleeding, which would be dangerous with Liz's previa condition.  He asked her to be monitored for two hours. 

The monitor caught more light contractions, and to be safe, Liz was asked to stay overnight.   They then started an IV, and Liz was asked not to eat, just in case they needed to do a c-section.  Magnesium Sulfate was given to Liz that night in hope of stopping the contractions.  This meant Liz was to stay a minimum of 48 hours.   We were alone in a semi-private room, which allowed me to stay with Liz overnight.   Liz had hot-flashes, which were one of the side effects of Magnesium Sulfate.

Saturday afternoon they took Liz off of the Magnesium Sulfate and started her on Nifedifine, which was also supposed to help with the contractions.   Sunday morning the doctors decided to have Liz stay at least one more day.  We joked of how it would be funny if she had the surgery on "Labor" day.  Fortunately, Monday morning came, and Liz was told it was okay to go home.  Needless to say, our initial 15 minute kept us at the hospital throughout the 3 day Labor Day weekend.  So much for the barbeques.

AMNIOCENTESIS

After 36 weeks, Liz had another ultrasound, which verified that she still had   complete placenta previa.  An amniocentesis was performed on September 16 to determine if the baby's lungs are mature.  This procedure was performed by Dr. Holbrook.   The doctors had to schedule the c-section before she goes into labor, but after the baby's lungs are mature enough to handle breathing on his own.     If the test determined that the baby's lungs were mature enough, a c-section would be scheduled for that Friday.   We went home to wait for the results. 

While we were waiting, Liz started feeling contractions.  They were strong enough for her to give Dr. Osterling a call.  He decided to have Liz come back to the hospital.  Just to be sure, we packed our overnight bag, but I was certain we would be returning a few hours later.

THE DECISION

A few hours later, as we were waiting in one of the hosptial rooms with Liz hooked up to a monitor, the doctors decided to have the surgery that night.  If my heart ever jumped to my throat before, if definately did then.  It was supposed to be Friday!   I'm not mentally prepared for this!  WAAAIIIITTTT!!!

It really hit me that I was going to be a father in only a few hours.  This whole pregnancy thing is going to be over, and now it's going to be a parenthood thing.   Wow. 

THE SURGERY

Soon after I was starting to accept the fact that this was happening tonight, the nurse brought me my scrubs.  Yes, I was going to witness this event.  I was determined to see this through with Liz as much as possible.  I was told that normally the father doesn't actually witness the surgery, but remains near the mothers head, where he can talk and sooth her.  

The 15 minutes in the surgery room waiting for things to get started were the longest 15 minutes of my life.  As I sat there with Liz on the table, and the room filling up with doctors and nurses, I couldn't keep still.  I just wanted this to happen as quickly as possible.  After all, I had the last 2 hours to psych myself up.  Now I just wanted Liz out of that room, recovering with our new baby.

Well, they finally started, and I must say, they did a fabulous job.  Okay, so I don't have the knowledge and experience to say that, but with Dr. Osterling and Dr. Meyer preciding over the surgery, I felt that Liz was in the best hands possible.

During the surgery, I kept looking at Liz who had received a shot and could not feel below her chest.  Liz didn't flinch throughout the whole surgery, from the first incision to when they were closing her up.  Even the actually delivery of our baby boy (it took us a day to decide on Evan as a name) was painless to Liz.  But boy, the amazement we had when we found out we had a boy!  We heard so many predictions of Liz having a girl, that we started to believe them.  So we narrowed down our names to three girls names, but had no boys names.   The only boy name I could think of was Elvis, but Liz wouldn't go for it.  Our next task, picking a name for our new baby boy.

RECOVERY

The next two days were spent recovering from the surgery.   I was fortunate to be able to stay in the same room with Liz throughout her stay.  The hospital arranged for a bed in the same room, so that I can spend as much time as possible with Liz and our baby.   And staying at the hospital gave us an opportunity to get rest, since the nursery would be able to take care of the baby while we slept.

THE MIX-UP

I couldn't believe that it was over with.  I felt so many things could have gone wrong, that we were two of the luckiest people on earth.  And just when we felt we escaped this whole ordeal without a scratch, something happened.

We were awakened on the 18th at around 3:30 in the morning.  The nurse had told us something happened.  Liz and I immediately cleared our heads from our deep sleep and were concentrating on each word we heard.  The nurse said Evan was fine, but that there was a mix-up.  A nurse had accidentally taken Evan to another mother to be nursed (it happened at around 2:00 to 2:30).

We were shocked.   We didn't know what to say or think.  Evan was fine, but Evan was taken to a different mother to be fed.  How could that have happened? Everytime Evan was brought to us, we couldn't even hold him until our wrist tags were matched to make sure we were the correct parents.  Yet someone else had our baby, and nursed him for "not more than 5 minutes".  That's five minutes to much in our book.

Needless to say, we could not sleep after that, and when Evan returned to us, we did not let him leave from our sight.  We were assured that tests were taken of Evan and the other mother so that nothing contagious could have been passed on to Evan, but there was a sense of violation that just grew and grew.   So many questions filled our minds.  "Couldn't the other mother realize it was not her baby?", "Didn't the nurse check the wrist bands first?". 

To this day, we have yet to receive a full explation of what happened, but so far it seems that Evan's health was not affected.  Liz and I will have to focus on that and thank God we have a healthy baby boy.  But until we receive that explanation, I feel we will not have peace.  The guilt of letting little Evan away from us for those few hours will remain on our minds for some time.

A HAPPY ENDING, AND A NEW BEGINNING 

Evan is now home with us, and I feel we are the happiest couple on earth.  Every day is a joy to see Evan  getting used to his new life.  Liz is probably getting sick of hearing "Did you hear him sneeze?  Doesn't it sound so cute!", and "Look! He's showing your dimples again!".  Yes, I am a proud father.   And a very happy husband.  And I look forward to seeing Evan grow up, and I will be there every step of the way to see him marvel at everything life will show him.