KC: Broadcasting from the depths of Dimension Z, we welcome you to the first ever Interdimensional Battle League event--Firestorm! At ringside, I'm KC along with MR, and this should be one hell of an event!

MR: We've got the universe's most powerful super heroes pitted against the most lethal super villains… what a slobberknocker this should turn out to be!

KC: Indeed, it will be! Tonight we start down the road to the first IBL Champion!

KC: Which of our 16 combatants will it be?!

MR: I'm not one to make predictions

KC: (Sarcastically) Yeah, of course not.

MR: If I had to I'd put my money on Venom. He's one dangerous SOB! Don't tell him I said that, though.

KC: I'll also point out that whomever becomes the champion gains control over their home world! If Venom or any other villain should win, I can't even begin to imagine what catastrophes would result!

MR: Quiet, fool! The emperor is about to speak!

KC: Zandemus is the alien overlord in charge of the IBL. It will be interesting to hear what he has to say.

(MR bows down before Zandemus in a showing of unworthiness)

KC: Oh, would you quit kissing ass? Sheesh!

MR: I would, but I don't think he has one. He's from another dimension, you know?

ZANDEMUS: Greetings, pitiful peons, and welcome to the first ever Interdimensional Battle League contest! The rules here are simple... there are no rules! Soon, we all shall witness the crowning of a new interdimensional champion. But make no mistake about it--this is not just some silly game. No, whomever shall walk away from this tournament as champion will gain possession of the power orb that will give him an extraordinary amount of power, an amount surpassed only by... (chuckles) well, me, of course!

KC: The stakes are quite high, as you can see.

ZANDEMUS: Now, since you dolts have miniscule attention spans, I'll cease my dialogue so we may get on with the show! 

(The crowd cheers, as does MR.)

MR: C'mon, KC. Show your emperor some respect!

KC: I'm not sure I like his attitude, but he should be responsible for putting on a good show tonight.

MR: No doubt! This is gonna be great!

(Light dims, Venom's music hits, and he strolls out, looking as menacing as ever.)

KC: Here comes Venom, the lethal monster who will face Wolverine in our first match tonight.

MR: He's not coming this way, is he?!

KC: I dunno. What business would he have with us?

MR: You didn't tell him what I said, did you?

KC: Luckily for you, I need a color man, so I spared your ass.

(Venom picks up a microphone from the ringside table.)

VENOM: Oh Wolveriiiiinnneeeeeee... Come on out! We've got a hankering for some fresh Canadian brains and we don't want to be kept waiting!

KC: Maybe he'll have your brains for desert, MR.

MR: Have you ever had Canadian brains, KC?

KC: I can't say that I have.

MR: I hear they're quite the delicacy!

KC: I'm sure they are. I bet they'd be twice as good with my new BBQ sauce, too.

MR: And of course, just so Venom knows this, my brains taste awful.

(Venom slams down the mike and walks to the ring. As he enters the squared circle, Wolverine's hard rock muic hits, and he makes a b-line for Venom!)

KC: Here comes Wolverine, answering Venom's challenge! He isn't wasting any time, as he's got the claws unsheathed and he'd swiping away at the blue beast!

(Venom ducks out of the way of a Wolverine punch and is able to use his force to knock the X-Man onto the mat.)

KC: Solid right hook there from Venom. He's starting to gain the upper hand in this affair.

MR: Wow, what a beast! Looks like he's ready to tear Wolverine limb from limb!

KC: He's using that sticky symbiote to hold Wolverine close to him!

MR: I tell ya, if Wolverine's brains weren't already rated Grade A by the Venom, they'd be telling him to tap out!

KC: Whoa! a solid kick to Venom's chest allowed Wolverine to break free! Now that he's free, Wolverine's having a field day on his opponent. It looks like--wait a minute, Venom countered Wolverine's DDT attempt and is looking to go on the offensive.

MR: WOW! Did you see that power bomb by Venom?

KC: That almost rattled the adamantium right out of his skeleton!

MR: Bad news for Wolverine--Venom is giving the throat-slashing gesture. Whenever Venom does that, it means his opponents have two things.

KC: What's that?

MR: Soiled undies and no chance in hell!

KC: Oh, that's just a load of BS! Wolverine is as tough as they come!

MR: Well, if he doesn't fight back, he's going to be as dead as they come!

KC: I think it's over... NO! Wolverine is getting back up!

MR: OH MY GOD! I don't believe it!

KC: Venom isn't happy!

MR: Well, of course not, you idiot!

KC: Wait a minute... Venom just vanished! Where'd he go?

MR: Wow, he can disappear? I didn't know he was a magician too!

KC: It must be his blending power! Wait, now he's striking at Wolverine from all sides!

MR: How much more can Wolverine take? I mean, he's only human! Well, at least most of him is.

KC: Whoa! Wolverine just slashed him dead on! He must have sniffed him out! Now Venom's making himself visible again... maybe Wolverine will win this yet!

MR: Whoa, Venom is pretty upset with Wolverine. Maybe he should try some anger management classes.

KC: Venom just picked Wolverine up by his head and slammed him face first into the mat! I tell you, the whole ring shook!

MR: Wow, talk about a pile-driver!

KC: Wolverine's not getting up. The ref is looking him over and...Venom is declared the winner!

MR: I think Wolverine's going to need serious plastic surgery just to distinguish his face from his ass!

KC: Now that's just uncalled for! He gave Venom a good whipping too! But nonetheless, Venom advances in the tournament and will eventually face the winner of our next match up!

KC: Here comes our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man! He'll be facing Bebop momentarily. It's just my humble opinion but he might be a little under classed in this matchup.

(As Spider Man steps into the ring, Bebop's music hits and the mutant warthog trots out to the ring.)

KC: Bebop's being accompanied by his best buddy Rocksteady. It looks like he will be watching this matching from ringside.

(Bebop enters the ring and the bell sounds.)

KC: Looks like it's time to kick off this battle. Bebop is wasting no time reaching for his laser blaster. Whoa! Spider-Man whipped it out of his hand and out of his reach with a web-line!

MR: Looks like this will be a short match. In fact, I think the crowd has emptied out into the concourse to get some refreshments.

KC: Yeah, I think we could just call this match the intermission. Anyway, Bebop doesn't look happy about losing his blaster! He's charging head long into Spider-Man, but Spider-Man's leaping out of the way! There's no one there!

KC: Bebop slams into a ring post on the other side!

MR: Ouch! If Bebop wasn't so dumb, I'd say that's smarts!

KC: Bebop is pretty strong, you have to admit! The force of that impact almost ripped the ring post right out!

MR: Strong, yes. Dumb as a rock? Well, yes on that, too.

(Rocksteady ends up on our side of the ring cheering his buddy on.)

KC: Spider-man just pulled Bebop's feet out from under him with his webs!

MR: Come on, Rocksteady. Help Bebop out!

KC: Damn it! Rocksteady just grabbed his laser blaster and he's firing it at Spider-Man! What a cheat!

MR: Wow, they're working together as a team! You know what Venom call it when they put their brains together like that?

KC: What?

MR: A bite-sized snack!

KC: Now Bebop's joining in. It's like target practice!

MR: And Spiderman's the clay pigeon!

KC: Spider-Man's spider sense is allowing him to dodge, but Bebop just grabbed his blaster and is firing away with Rocksteady. Unfortunately for Spider Man, he can't dodge forever!

MR: And down he goes!

KC: He's hit! Spider-man was hit! And he's getting pelted by laser fire! It's ripping his costume!

(The ref calls for the bell.)

KC: Oh no, I don't believe this! The ref is declaring Bebop the winner!

MR: As he should. Spider Man is toast!

KC: How the hell could this be considered fair?!

MR: I dunno, but it looks like our wonderful emperor has come out to personally congratulate Bebop!

(Zandemus walks out to the ring, as MR bows again.)

ZANDEMUS: Hold it just a second. How can this twerp (points to Bebop), whose even dumber than you idiots, beat someone like Spider-Man?

KC: Bebop's not much of a winner in my book

ZANDEMUS: This league has no use for pathetic chumps like you and your foolish comrade. Therefore, by my order, I deem this match to CONTINUE! (Huge crowd pop) And, in this and all future matches, I hereby deem the use of projectiles and foreign objects illegal and punishable by disqualification!

MR: NO! What is he doing?!

KC: Whoa! Did you hear that?

MR: I love our emperor, but how can he do that to poor Bebop?

KC: It's called justice, MR. Some combatants are going to have to work a lot harder to win!

MR: He worked so hard for that win! The emperor's taking away something he rightly earned!

KC: Spider-Man's getting up now, and Zandemus is leaving the ring, dragging Rocksteady away with him!

MR: Oh no!

KC: A huge wallop from Spider-Man!

MR: Run, Bebop! Run!

KC: Spider-Man is just too quick. I don't think he's not too happy about being almost zapped into oblivion!

MR: Oh my gosh! What a beating! Ring the bell, ref!

KC: Whoa! He just hurled Bebop into the air like a pillow! Now Spider-Man is doing a back-flip and kicking Bebop in mid-air at the same time!!

KC: Bebop just hit the mat hard, and it doesn't look like he'll be getting up anytime soon.

MR: No, he's going to pin him! Where's Rocksteady when you really need him?

(1... 2... 3!)

MR: NO!

KC: Spider-Man is the winner, and Bebop's still unconscious. Now Spider-Man is coming over to pick up a microphone...

SPIDER-MAN: Don't you little mutants know that cheaters never win?

MR: He should be thanking our wonderful emperor for saving his rear end!

SPIDER-MAN: Don't feel too bad, though, I hear they're casting "Animal Farm" in a studio down the hall!

MR: Hey, that was uncalled for!

SPIDER-MAN: And--surprise, surprise--it looks like I'm going to end up facing Venom in the quarterfinals! Be prepared, Eddie. I've beaten you before and I'll do it again!

(Spider Man tosses down the mic and exits the ring.)

KC: Strong words from the man who could very wellend up being our champion.

MR: Oh, I sure hope not. That would be awful!

KC: Probably make one of the best champs out of our sordid little group from where I sit.

MR: He'd better buy the emperor a nice thank you present!

KC: Now it's time to focus on the next battle--Magneto vs. Raphael!

MR: Well, I certainly hope this match will be more fair than that last one.

(Raphael comes out to his music.)

KC: The ref is taking Raphael's sais, as per Zandemus' new no-weapons rule.

MR: Despite not having his sais, Raphael should be able to easily walk all over this old geezer.

KC: I have to agree. Magneto is not the hand-to-hand fighter Raphael is.

(Mageneto's music hits, and the powerful mutant floats to the ring.)

KC: Now Magneto is floating out to the ring.

MR: Pfft! What a show off!

KC: The referee has allowed Magneto to keep his body armor and helmet.

MR: And he's going to need it, too. 

KC: Wow, this Ninja Turtle is really taking it to Magneto, whose armor is no match for the flying fists of a skilled ninja. Raphael is being careful not to let a punch or a kick go towards Magneto's head, as his helmet would surely cause a great deal of pain.

MR: Didn't Magneto buy that helmet at the thrift store with last month's social security check?

KC: Whoa, Magneto just slid swiftly out of the way of Raphael's onslaught! It looks like he might have used his floatation power, but the ref didn't notice.

MR: Of the three in the ring, you'd think Magneto would be the one losing his eye sight. Hey, did you know he was alive when Benjamin Franklin invented bifocals?

KC: Heh heh, no, I didn't realize that. Back to the match, as the master of magnetism is attempting his own physical assault on Raphael. Unfortunately for him, his opponent is far too quick!

MR: Just give it up, Magnet-old. Don't you know your Medicaid won't cover in-ring injuries?

KC: Magneto is definitely nowhere near Raphael in terms of physical ability, so he's going to have to rely on his incredible intellect if he hopes to pull this one out. Raphael just stopped pummeling Magneto, now he's smiling and giving Magneto a free shot!

MR: Pretty cocky. Then again, Magneto probably has a better chance of hitting the jackpot at a casino than he does of landing a punch on Raphael!

KC: Magneto with a right hook, but Raphael fell to the ground ducking out of the way! Magneto falls down to the mat, as Raphael just points and laughs. Boy, you called that one!

MR: Ah! He's fallen and he can't get up!

KC: Now he's grabbing Mageneto's legs and rolling him up for a pin!

(1... 2...)

KC: Magneto kicked out before three, but just barely!

MR: Wow, I'm surprised Magneto was able to kick out with his artificial hip of his.

KC: Well you have to give him some credit, MR. After all, he is fighting valiantly against all odds! Both combatants are now back on their feet. Magneto looks to be a bit woozy.

MR: It looks like Raphael wants to end this one early. He's preparing for his finishing move!

KC: Raphael's climbing the ring post... going for the Shell Shocker! He leaped off and slammed into Magneto full force with his shell!

MR: Wow! What a move!

KC: That was pretty incredible, I must admit. Magneto is down and seemingly out. Raphael is going for the pin!

(1... 2...)

KC: WHOA! Out of nowhere, one of Raphael's sais just flew in from outside the ring and hit the turtle in the back of the head!

MR: It's a good thing he got hit with the handle and not the blade or his bandana wouldn't be the only red thing in the ring.

KC: Magneto broke up the pin because the ref didn't see the sai!

MR: Geez, what are we paying these referees for anyway?

KC: That's a good question. Anyway, it looks like Raphael was struck pretty hard, as he's now looking a little woozy. Magneto is now taking advantage of Raphael's dizziness, as he slams him down on the mat. He's going for the pin!

(1... 2... 3)

KC: It's over. Magneto wins, and in a less than honorable way, I might add.

MR: Come on emperor! Get out and fix this! This is the Interdimensional Battle League, not the Geriatric Battle League!

KC: Well, it doesn't appear that he's on his way out her. We may just have to accept the outcome this time. Magneto hightailed it out of the arena, and Raphael is just getting to his feet, unsure of what happened.

MR: He has to be pretty pissed off after getting screwed over like that.

KC: I shudder to think what Raphael will do to Magneto once he finds out what happened.

KC: Well folks, in case you missed it on the IBL website, Mega Man will face a surprise opponent in our next matchup.

MR: I wonder who it will be!

KC: I dunno either, but our correspondent Hermy is backstage with Mega Man as we speak.

HERMY: Mega Man, you're scheduled to face a mystery opponent in the next match up. How do you feel about being put at this disadvantage?

MEGA MAN: Well I am a little worried, but I have a feeling in my circuits that it's probably Dr. Wily or one of his robots like it always is.

HERMY: What about Zandemus' new rule banning the use of foreign objects such as your plasma blaster in matches? How will this affect you here tonight?

MEGA MAN: Well, I won't lie to you. I'm a little concerned about not having the power, but I won't let that keep me from going out and doing all that I can to emerge victorious in my match.

HERMY: Quickly, do you have any words for Wily?

MEGA MAN: Dr. Wily, if you're behind this, get ready for your bots to have a Mega meltdown!

(Mega Man leaves the backstage area.)

HERMY: Back to you guys.

KC: Well, Mega Man seems rather confident. Hopefully he can pull this off. Anyone making a sneak attack has got to be bad news, and we don't need someone like that in line for the title!

(Mega Man comes to the ring to the theme of Mega Man 2 on NES.)

KC: Here comes Mega Man, ready to take on the mystery challenger that awaits him!

(A familiar whistle sounds throughout the arena, bringing the crowd to a shocked hush.)

KC: No! It can't be!

(Mega Man's brother, Proto Man, emerges from the entrance and begins pacing to the ring.)

KC: It's not one of Dr. Wily's robots! Instead, it's Mega Man's own brother, Proto Man!

(Mega Man picks up the microphone.)

MEGA MAN: Proto Man?! It that really you?!

PROTO MAN: ...

MEGA MAN: It's got to be some kind of trick! It can't really be you!

KC: Proto Man just threw down his shield and now he's assaulting Mega Man! Proto Man is fighting furiously, like he's going for the kill!

MR: Why is he doing this? Has he turned on his brother?!?

KC: I have no idea. Mega Man hasn't fought back yet. I don't think he wants to hurt his own brother.

MR: What a tough situation for Mega Man. What can he do?

KC: Surprisingly, Proto Man giving his brother a chance to gather his bearings, as Mega Man continues to appeal to his brother to stop..

MR: Well, that didn't work Proto Man just belted him!

KC: The Blue Bomber is very distraught! What could cause Proto Man to act like this?

MR: Well, he's a robot, so maybe he has a screw loose or something.

KC: That could very well be. Mega Man is punching back now, though he is pulling them so as not to hurt Proto Man. He's really got no choice though.

MR: Too bad for him he can't use his blaster.

KC: Can you imagine how chaotic this arena would be if they both could?

MR: I'll tell ya one thing--I wouldn't want to be anywhere near them if they were blasting away at each other!

KC: I think I'd hide under this table! Anyway, back to the action, as Mega Man just clocked his brother right between the eyes, now he's opening up a hidden panel on Proto Man's chest! Proto Man went limp! Mega Man shut him down! Again, the referee didn't seem to notice!

MR: Emperor Zandemus, if you're listening, would you please fire these idiots?

KC: Mega Man is laying his brother down, and going for the pin.

(1... 2... 3)

KC: It's over! Mega Man has defeated Proto Man!

(Mega Man does not celebrate, but instead walks over to his brother .)

KC: I have a feeling we haven't seen the last of this rivalry! 

MR: I still can't believe Proto Man turned on his own brother. Why, Proto Man? Why?

KC: I have a feeling we'll soon find out, MR. Mega Man is supporting his lifeless brother as he drags him out of the ring.

MR: Wow, I'm still in shock. What's next, KC?

KC: We've got He-Man versus Rocksteady! We've already seen Bebop in a battle, how will Rocksteady fare?

MR: Hopefully he won't get the screw job like his pal. What a joke that was! Wait, the emperor's not listening to this, is he KC?

KC: You'd better hope not!

MR: I take it back! I think it was a great move on our wonderful emperor's part!

KC: And here comes He-Man, the mighty Eternian warrior! He-Man is voluntarily handing over his power sword to the ref. He always plays by the rules. Now Rocksteady is heading out. The ref is stopping him and searching for hidden laser blasters.

MR: Heh heh. Give him a strip search, ref! 

KC: Eww! Don't think we need to see that!

MR: Hey, maybe that's how the referee went blind in the first place!

KC: All right, here we go!

MR: Rocksteady keeps reaching for his laser blaster. Too bad it's not there!

KC: He-Man grabbing Rocksteady in a headlock. He seems to be going a lot easier on him than he probably could be.

MR: Well, if my opponent had huge horns on his head I'd be careful too!

KC: That's a good point, MR. Get it? Good point?

MR: Whoa, P.U.! That joke stunk!

MR: Or maybe that's Rocksteady's B.O.!

KC: Probably a little of both! Anyhow, Rocksteady has broken free with considerable ease! Let's not forget how strong that mutant really is!. Rocksteady attempted to throw a punch at He-man, but He-man is grabbing his arm and pulling him closer!

MR: Ouch, looks like he has a half nelson going on Mr. Stinky.

KC: A half nelson from He-Man is definitely something you want to avoid!

MR: Yeah, you should avoid it like I did with Paula Jones' Penthouse pictorial! Then again, with Rocksteady's strength, he might be able to break the hold.

KC: Maybe... yes! He did it! Now he's ramming his horns full force into He-Man!

MR: I don't know if they have Swiss cheese where He-Man comes from, but after this match they will!

KC: I sure hope not! He-Man does a lot of good for the people of Eternia. He-Man was actually knocked back off his feet! I don't think he was prepared for that!

MR: Boy, Rocksteady's really giving it to him now!

KC: I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't seeing it! I think He-Man is realizing that he's going to have to put more effort into it if he's going to win this one!

MR: I dunno, I think this match is rigged!

KC: He-Man seems to be pulling it together.  He just delivered a huge slam to Rocksteady that sent the mutant reeling! Now he's picking Rocksteady up! He actually lifted the rhino over his head!

MR: With one hand! Oh my gosh!

KC: SLAM! Rocksteady actually bounced off the mat!

MR: I think the earth shook on that one!

KC: I have never seen such an impressive display of strength! Rocksteady is down and out and He-Man is going for the cover.

(1... 2... 3)

KC: He-Man defeats Rocksteady and advances to the second round of the IBL Championship Tournament! What a night it's been so far! The combatants have cleared the arena, and now we're getting a backstage shot...

SHREDDER: Oh, those pathetic cretins! They blew it!

(Rocksteady and Bebop arrive backstage and meet up with Shredder.)

BEBOP: Hey, boss. Did you see our matches?!

SHREDDER: Your match doesn't concern me as much as this horn head's blundering!

ROCKSTEADY: But it wasn't our fault, boss. It was that Zandemus guy! He wouldn't let us fight dirty!

BEBOP: Yeah, he took away our blasters!

SHREDDER: Well, curse him and curse you two incompetent boobs for ruining my plan! Now I'll have to face He-Man!

ROCKSTEADY: Don't ya have to beat that bat-twerp foist, boss?

SHREDDER: Don't worry about me, you fool. Just get out of here. I have business to take care of.

KC: It looks like Shredder wanted Rocksteady to win so he'd have an easy opponent if he makes it to the quarterfinals!

MR: Well do you blame him?

KC: I suppose not. But getting to the quarterfinals won't be easy; he has to face the Dark Knight, who is heading for the ring as we speak!

(Batman enters to his Danny Elfman-composed movie theme.)

KC: I'm getting chills just looking at Batman from here. His presence is very ominous!

MR: I'm pretty damn scared myself! Hold me, KC!

KC: Ummmmmmm... anyway, Shredder is now on his way out!

MR: I think Shredder's sick of dealing with turtles, so he's on to a different species.

KC: That's true. Smart idea, since the Turtles always manage to defeat him.

MR: Hey, I heard the Turtles gave Shredder a new name!

KC: What's that?

MR: The Brooklyn Brawler! (laughs at his joke)

KC: Gimme a break!

MR: Hey, why's the ref making him take off his armor?

KC: I guess he considers the blades to be illegal.

MR: Yeah, I think that's what his wife responded with after he asked her why she doesn't shave her legs!

KC: Looks like Shredder's not overly happy about the situation, though he is allowed to keep his helmet and face plate.

MR: Look at this, Batman has the advantage! He gets to keep his armor. How unfair is that?!

KC: Well, maybe it's because he doesn't have razor-sharp blades coming out of his! Anyway, onto the match. Shredder starts with a spinning heel kick, but Batman easily dodges!

MR: Come on, Shredder. Knock that rodent on his butt!

KC: More punches and kicks from Shredder, but Batman is still dodging! He's like a shadow; untouchable! And... wow, a quick leaping kick from Shredder manages to connect with Batman's face!

MR: Hey KC, you know what I heard?

KC: What?

MR: I hear Shredder has something up his sleeves!

KC: But he doesn't have sleeves, MR.

MR: Oh, you know what I mean!

KC: Batman is now taking the offensive! He tries to slug Shredder several times, but the Foot Clan leader blocks them all. Shredder may be known for losing, but he is a heck of a ninja warrior!

MR: Of course he is! Otherwise, he wouldn't be an IBL competitor.

KC: A kick from Batman, but Shredder grabs the ankle to prevent it from connecting! But wait! Batman is pivoting on his leg in mid-air and striking Shredder's head with his free leg!

MR: Wow, even I wasn't expecting that!

KC: Even through his helmet, Shredder felt that one! Now Batman is standing still, waiting for his opponent's next move.

MR: Oh no, I think Shredder's a little woozy. Watch out!

KC: Shredder's backing up, and... my word! He just did a back flip in mid-air over Batman's head with a leg sweep that just dropped the surprised Batman to the mat! But Batman just bent his legs back, grabbed Shredder's head with them and flipped him into the air! He's flying out of the ring!

MR: Watch out! He's coming this way!!!

(MR gets out of the way just in time to avoid being slammed into by Shredder.)

MR: Whoa, that was close!

KC: It looks like no one is safe from these two!

MR: What a match we're having, though!

KC: Shredder's getting back into the ring.

MR: I'm worried about him. He doesn't look good.

KC: He is a bit banged up from that little ride Batman just gave him.

KC: Batman's picking him up by his shoulders and attacking with a head butt! Ouch! Big mistake on the Dark Knight's part; his costume isn't anywhere near as hard as Shredder's helmet!

MR: Wow, now he's looking woozy.

KC: Shredder kicks him in the gut and flips him over his head!

KC: The Dark Knight is flat on his back and Shredder is laughing at him!

MR: Hey, it's Bebop and Rocksteady!

KC: What the hell are those two doing here?!

MR: I think they're here to have a friendly chat with the ref.

KC: The referee is telling them to leave! So much for that!

MR: Come on, ref! They're just being cordial!

KC: Good Lord Almighty! With the referee distracted, Shredder just pulled out a laser blaster and assaulted Batman! The Dark Knight is down and out! Now that Shredder's done his damage, Bebop and Rocksteady are leaving. This is unbelievable...

MR: I think I just heard Shredder say, "Bang! Bang!" (chuckles)

KC: I can't believe he'd compare himself with someone like Mick Foley!

MR: Are you kidding? Shredder's the real hardcore legend!

KC: Mercifully, Shredder is going for the pin.

(1... 2... 3)

KC: Well, Shredder has won, but it's definitely a tainted victory.

MR: I guess Bebop and Rocksteady made up for their first round loss by helping Shredder win here.

KC: An ill-begotten victory from a twisted evil master mind! Where is Zandemus, by the way? After that first match, he's been nowhere to be seen!

MR: Hey, I'm sure he's busy making our lives better! Wouldn't you agree?

KC: No, to be quite honest with you. I don't trust him at all.

MR: How can you say that about our emperor, you ungrateful swine?

KC: He just seems a little shady to me. We're getting something on our monitors from backstage. Wait, it's He-Man. It looks like Rocksteady is trying to get his attention as they both walk down the hallway.

MR: I think Rocksteady just wants to chat like he did with the ref.

ROCKSTEADY: Think you've seen the last of me, you... you... jerk!

MR: Oh my gosh!

HE-MAN: Look, I don't want any trouble. We can settle this in the ring or we can talk it over like civilized men.

MR: Too bad He-Man fails to realize that Rocksteady's not a man. Or civilized, for that matter.

BEBOP: (from behind) We ain't all dat civilized! Get 'em!

(Bebop and Rocksteady gang up on He-Man and begin to overcome him.)

MR: Well, I guess Rocksteady isn't feeling chatty after all.

KC: This isn't fair!

MR: Oh come on, they're just relieving their frustration from their losses.

KC: They should learn how to lose with dignity! Hell, they're going to lose every match anyway, so this could be a repeat occurrence if frustration is indeed their reasoning for doing this. Wait! A web line just pulled Rocksteady off! It's Spider-Man, coming to the aid of his fellow hero!

MR: What's that pajama-wearing freak doing there?

KC: He-Man and Spider-Man just made quick work of the two punks! He's webbed them up and left them hanging from the ceiling!

MR: I hope Shredder has his armor back so he can cut them down!

KC: Is there no limit to what those low-lives will try?

MR: Yeah, really. He-Man and Spider Man must be stopped! They're as low as they come!

KC: You know I meant Bebop and Rocksteady...

MR: What? Are you kidding? You're a nut!

KC: Let's just get on with the next matchup! We still have two to go and they're both going to be pretty heated, I imagine! Goliath is going to face Skeletor momentarily, followed by our main event; Michaelangelo versus the Joker! The winners of tonight's final two contests will face each other in the quarter-finals!

MR: I can hardly wait!

(Goliath's music hits.)

KC: Look! Goliath is soaring out to the ring!

MR: What a showoff!

(Skeletor's music hits.)

KC: Whoa! A smoky explosion! It's Skeletor making his presence known!

MR: Looks like business is about to pick up, eh KC?

KC: I would certainly say so! Goliath is no newcomer when it comes to dealing with magic, but Skeletor is a very powerful wizard! Now that the referee has relieved him of his powerful havoc staff, we're set to go! Goliath is going to work on Skeletor with his fists! Skeletor is doing what he can to dodge, but he's not the best hand to hand fighter there is!

MR: Yeah, he's just skin and bones--minus the skin, that is!

KC: A whip from Goliath's tail just sent Skeletor over onto his back. I don't think Skeletor is much of a match for Goliath on a physical level.

MR: I think you may be right. He's getting his bony ass kicked all over the ring!

KC: He doesn't look too happy about it, either. Skeletor is very high and mighty, so this isn't doing much for his image.

MR: Neither is his hideous face!

KC: Goliath seems to be letting up on Skeletor. I think he feels sorry for him!

MR: Well, Skeletor is ugly and he can't fight a lick, so I can't say that I blame him.

KC: Skeletor is now steady on his feet, face to face with Goliath. And it looks like Goliath is giving Skeletor the option of noble surrender.

MR: Accept his offer, Skeletor. Keep your dignity!

KC: No, Skeletor doesn't want to give in! He's throwing a punch!

MR: No, you fool!

KC: What the???? It barely tapped Goliath's head but the big Gargoyle is reeling over and falling flat on his back. Now Skeletor's going for the pin!

(1... 2... 3)

MR: Oh my gosh! He won?!

KC: Skeletor did it! But how? How did he level Goliath with one tiny punch?

MR: Boy, I'll bet someone in Vegas made a lot on that match.

KC: Well I'm not quite sure what we just saw, to be honest with you. Now Goliath is finally getting up, and he's not too sure what's going on!

MR: He sold out, that's what happened!

KC: I can't believe he'd do a thing like that!

MR: Well that's just because your a gullible yokel.

KC: Hang on a sec... we're getting something from the backstage area again...

SHREDDER: Michaelangelo's match is up next. I must make sure he doesn't advance, at any cost!

MR: What else is Shredder going to try and pull tonight?

BEBOP: Want our help, boss?

SHREDDER: No, you've served your usefulness for tonight. Get back to the Technodrome.

ROCKSTEADY: Sure thing, boss.

MR: I wonder if Michaelangelo knows what's going on.

KC: Well I don't know about that, but he better be ready for anything, though. Speaking of Michaelangelo, here he comes now.

(Michaelangelo enters to a the Ninja Turtles cartoon theme song.)

MR: Ugh! Would someone please turn that music off? It makes me want to vomit!

KC: Many would argue that he's the most popular of the foursome, meaning the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

MR: Not me. I think they're all idiots!

KC: Even Donatello?

MR: Especially him! Have you ever seen how many inventions he goofs up?

KC: Well, I can't argue with you there.

(The Joker enters to one of the Prince songs from the original Batman movie.)

KC: Now the Joker is heading out, looking as happy as always. This man is perhaps the sickest villain on our entire roster.

MR: How can someone who smiles so much be sick?

KC: He's murdered more innocent people than Michaelangelo has eaten pizzas, I'd wager!

MR: Well, I'm sure they all had it coming.

KC: That's an awful thing to say!

MR: Sometimes the truth hurts, KC.

KC: They've both been stripped of their weapons and are confronting each other in the middle of the ring. Both of these competitors are known pranksters, albeit in very different ways. Michaelangelo is going to work on the Joker; or trying to anyway because the Joker keeps sliding out of reach of his fists!

MR: He's a quick one, that Joker.

KC: He's staring into the eyes of Michaelangelo, as if he's trying to psyche him out. Now a quick uppercut, strikes Michaelangelo in the chin! But Michaelangelo counters with a quick roundhouse kick, which caught the Joker off guard! And now Michaelangelo's taking the offensive, with a leaping kick to the face! And another! And another! The crowd's cheering him on!

MR: Stop cheering him, you idiots!

KC: The Joker just managed to slide down between Michaelangelo's legs and he's pulling the turtle over. And the Ninja Turtle just went flat on his face, and now he's tickling the bottom of Michaelangelo's feet!

MR: How can you not like the Joker?

KC: Mike's laughing hysterically. He can't stand it! Now Joker has stopped tickling and just gave Michaelangelo a swift kick to the head.

MR: You have to admit that was pretty funny, KC!

KC: I think it's sick. Wait, Michaelangelo just made it to his feet, and he's picking the Joker up! He's spinning him over his head! It's the Pizza Toss, his finishing maneuver!

MR: No, fight back Joker!

KC: He slammed Joker down onto the mat! He's going for the pin!

MR: Get up! Get up!

(1... 2...)

KC: Oh, and a near fall for Michaelangelo. That one was close! Now both of them are back on their feet now; Joker seems to be getting a bit more serious. As serious as he ever gets at least. And what's that?! Shredder is heading out to the ring!

MR: Maybe Shredder is scouting for future matches.

KC: The ref is now focused on Shredder, telling him to get the hell out of here.

MR: Looks like the Joker has a free shot.

KC: And Joker just let loose with a blast of acid from his flower! Michaelangelo managed to dodge, and it's a good thing, as the acid ate a hole through the mat!

MR: Yikes!

KC: The Joker's laughing manically! Now a razor-sharp playing card from out of his sleeve! It just cut Michaelangelo's forearm open!

MR: Well, you have to admit it is pretty funny.

KC: Oh will you stop! This is blatant cheating, and thanks to Shredder the ref isn't seeing any of it!

MR: Oh, the ref's an idiot. He wouldn't have seen it anyway!

KC: Joker just hurled an exploding doll at Michaelangelo, but the Turtle managed to dodge. Unfortunately, he still got some of the blast! The ref heard it and is turning around, but... NO! Shredder punched him! Shredder just punched the referee! 

MR: Well, Shredder's just a tad frustrated. You have to understand.

KC: Michaelangelo has had it! He's pulling out something from his belt! It's a wind-up robot! Michaelangelo is fighting fire with fire!

MR: What the hell?

KC: Joker is grinning down at it in amusement, but it just shot a plastic missile into Joker's eye!

MR: This is criminal! He should be disqualified for that brutal attack!

KC: Joker is rubbing his eye, and Michaelangelo is picking him up, going for another Pizza Toss! (SMASH!) He got it! Now he's going for the cover...

MR: No!

KC: The ref just pushed Shredder down on his ass and has rushed over to count out the pin!

MR: What are you doing, you stupid ref?!

(1... 2...3)

MR: NO! Joker has been robbed!

KC: He did it! Michaelangelo has beaten the Joker, despite the clown prince of crime's blatant cheating! This is really a victory against both Shredder and the Joker! Speaking of Shredder, the ninja isn't happy at all. Wait, he just entered the ring and... and he just beat down the referee!

MR: Good. He deserved it!

KC: Somebody get out here and stop this! Now the Joker is back up, and the two of them are ganging up on Michaelangelo! This is sick, just si-- wait, is that... YES! It's Raphael! Raphael is coming out! He's running out to help his brother!

MR: Hey, get him out of here!

KC: He just clocked the Joker with the butte of his sai, but Shredder kicked him over!

MR: There we go!

KC: It's total chaos in the ring! Get someone out here to get this situation under control!

MR: Yeah, we need Bebop and Rocksteady out here!

KC: Joker is trying to get to his feet! Raphael kicked Shredder in the gut, but just took a playing card to his leg! Now Batman is coming out! He's here to aid the Turtles!

MR: What a mess!

KC: The three of them are beating the two villains out of the ring! This is pure insanity!

MR: What a brouhaha!

KC: Have Shredder and the Joker formed an alliance? Who will advance to the semi-finals? What sneaky ploys will Bebop and Rocksteady try to pull? And what's up with Proto Man? Tune in to the next episode of Firestorm as the IBL saga continues!