I walked into her office on a hot July afternoon. I wasn't supposed to feel this way, with the sun shining all around me. The sun warmed my skin and yet, I was cold, oh, so cold and slow inside.
I immediately felt comfortable. It was as if we had met before and that we used to be friends. She likes the Rolling Stones and Lynyrd Skynyrd. She has a chestnut horse and a tabby cat. She served in the gulf war and I think that makes her stronger than the rest of us. Her sister may be bipolar and her mother died when when she was just a young adult. She has a boyfriend and used to be afraid of bees. This is all I know, I wish I knew more.
I began to see her with my first diagnosis of depression. I had already begun prozac for a couple months that took much too long too work!!! I spent the summer in the cave of my home. In bed sleeping or a zombie inside the TV. The kids lost their Mom. My husband had lost his wife. Neither I nor they, knew if I was coming back. Life had failed to exist for us all.
Then one day, I was swept out of Dorothys black and white house. A huge tornado took me to the land of Oz. The colors were brilliant. The world was strange, yet wonderful and I had energy to run up the yellow brick road. I killed the wicked witch of the east and I got her ruby slippers!!! I could go anywhere, So off I went to see the wizard.
But that's not normal!!
STOP
SLOW ME DOWN
HOLD ME
MOLD ME
AND THEY DID
I was rediagnosed manic-depressive. Bipolar. 2 poles?? One way up and one way down. I like Oz, but they said I couldn't stay there. I had to take mood stabilizers. Were they calling me un-stable?? I felt fine. Therapy took a twist. I didn't want to accept this. This was not me. Where was I in the middle of these two poles? How can I even reach myself?
I traveled OZ for a long time-enjoyed the scenery and the people I met. I met some with no hearts, some with no courage and some with no brains. The Emerald city was fake,a destination of illusion. The monkeys in my mind, took me back to the dark castle of depression. They did it when I wasn't looking. I looked into the crystal ball and saw no future.
Elizabeth gave me the hot air-balloon.But I missed the ropes.
Now it's time to click my heels 3 times with the ruby red slippers and go home.
Written by Holly Copyrighted {c} 1998
Lyric's for Dust In The Wind
I close my eyes.
Only for a moment and the moment's gone.
All my dreams,
Passed before my eyes in curiosity.
REFRAIN: Dust in the wind,
All we are is dust in the wind.
Same old song.
Just a drop of water in an endless sea.
All we do,
Crumbles to the ground though we refuse to see.
REFRAIN: Dust in the wind,
All we are is dust in the wind.
Musical solo
Now don't hang on.
Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky.
It slips away,
And all your money won't another minute buy.
REFRAIN:Dust in the wind,
All we are is dust in the wind,
All we are is dust in the wind.
Dust in the wind,
Everything is dust in the wind,
Everything is dust in the wind.
BIPOLAR POLLS...PLEASE TAKE A FEW SECONDS TO ANSWER
Chicken Soup For The Soul
Jessie Huber's Story-It happened to me-(My Institutional Hospitalizations)
A Possitive Experience of ECT
Talk Therapy and People With Bipolar Disorder
Why Isn't Mental Illness Talked About? A True Story...
The Infection Connection
Whirling...A Narrative About Racing Thoughts
How to order my poetry book entitled-- There's a Pineapple Stuck in my Head.
My Journey Through Oz
My Bipolar Biography
My Biplar Journal
THERE'S A PINAPPLE STUCK IN MY HEAD-MY POETRY
How My Family Deals and Feels About Me Being Gone in Oz, While They Are Just On Earth
Coping With Mental Illness
Sleep Loss Can Trigger Mania
Creativity and Bipolar Disorder
Depression Checklist
Mania Questionaire
Narratives of Life
Send me your personal accounts with Bipolar, for our own biography page
LINKS to other bipolar pages
Medical Information on Bipolar
What to do when you are manic or depressed
10 Things to NOT say to someone who's depressed
Suicide
Take Care While Taking Prescription Drugs
Childhood Bipolar Disorder?
The Affective Spectrum
Movies and Books-- the plots revolve around mental illness
Bipolar poems sent to me-AN AWESOME COLLECTION
Emily Dickinsons History-Diagnosed bipolar...Her Poetry & letters
Vincent Van Gogh-Creative Bipolar Artist
My Favorite Rod McKuen Poems
My former codependent life and quotes to live by
Reflections in the Mirror-My Therapy Poetry
Winds of Within-More of my Thought Provoking Poetry
PSYCHOLOGY HUMOR-LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE.
Anti-Stress Kit
Music I listen to
My Awards
Last Updated June 27,1999
Website Created in August of 1998
Please Sign My Guestbook-Scroll down to view my Guestbook
Animated gifs & backgrounds courtesy ofBarrys Clip Art Server
Music provided by:Mamas Music Midis
Disclaimer: Information provided here should not take the place of your professional mental health provider. Seek their help if you have an immediate problem and check to see if you have a 24 hour crisis hotline in your area.
