"I can't believe we're even ATTEMPTING this!" Dimitri shouted out in frustration.  "And on top of it I'M the one who has to lug all this baggage around!"  This really was grossly unfair, he thought.  Anya and Vlad were walking along, just happy as could be, not even listening to him.  Humph!

"Trust me, Dimitri, I promise you she won't kill us or maim us, or anything else you're already accusing her of."  Vlad rubbed his nose with his now almost dripping hankie. "Ughhh, I feel like I ate one too many plates of Galubtsy."

Dimitri ignored the latter statement.  "And we know she won't hurt us how? How??  You know, the Germans hated the Russians in the World War!"

"We weren't even IN the World War that long," Anya said as she glanced back at her struggling comrade.  "Anyway, I trust Vlad.  Why would a friend of his try to murder us while we stay at her farmhouse for a few days?  Vlad can hardly even WALK, Dimitri, and you're complaining!"

Dimitri huffed.  "It's just a cold, that's all.  I tell you, he only has a cold, and we're just going to waste time and put our lives in jeopardy..."

"Cold schmold!  You should care about Vlad more," Anya scolded as she scratched Pooka behind his ears.  "You just don't want to waste a precious day!"  Dimitri blushed.  She was a little too good at getting to the point for his tastes sometimes.  He really was worried about Vlad, but on the same token he didn't want all of them to be murdered in their sleep by some kooky Lady in Germany.

"Well, maybe I could if someone would help me carry all these bags!"  He hated to admit it, but he really was starting to struggle under all this weight.  It wasn't even the weight, it was the...SHAPE of them.  The whole piling in his arms part.  How horrible it was going to be when he simply fainted from exhaustion...would Anya care then?  You bet she would!  She'd look at his collapsed form and weep over his body, taking his limp hand in her own, finally realizing what she had done --

"Oh, the poor little baby!"

"I am NOT a baby!"

"There it is!  I...think."  Vlad pointed to a tiny speck in a large green farming field, consulted his paper with the address on it once more, then looked again.  "Yes, that's it."  Anya gasped.

"Oh it's so beautiful!  I can barely see it from here, but I see a fence...oh, and it's white, isn't it?  It's so quaint!  Such a wonderful place to stop!"

"Such a good spot for a crime scene!" Dimitri mumbled as he staggered with the suitcases by Anya.

Vlad quickly wiped his dripping nose before knocking on the door once they had trekked across the pasture.  Anya was enchanted with every little thing (as she was so often, Dimitri thought secretly), and even the "poor, poor baggage carrier" (as he had come to think of himself as) had to admit it was pretty scenery.

There was a long pause between Vlad knocking and when their soon-to-be hostess (who had no idea of their visit) would arrive.  Dimitri used the opportunity to ask a few questions.

"So how exactly do you know her again Vlad?"

"We met once at a party when she was staying in St. Petersburg.  Ahh yes, it was 1905..."

Dimitri's jaw dropped. "You met ONCE?  And you were what, 30?!  We're going to stay with a complete stranger!"

"Nonsense, Dimitri!  It was a cousin of a friend's girlfriend of a friend of a friend of a husband's friend who introduced us and..."  Vlad paused to contemplate what he had said.  Dimitri finished his sentence for him.

"Which makes her a complete stranger!"

The door opened.

"Hello?"  From the shadows stepped -- no, not a monster as Dimitri was already preparing to face -- but a stout little old woman, as quaint as her fields.  Anya smiled smugly at Dimitri.

"What a horrible Russian-killing dragon, Dimitri," she whispered teasingly into his ear.

"May I help you?"

Vlad beamed.  "I am the Count Vladimir Vanya Vointsky Vasilovich.  We met once in St. Petersburg...December of 1905..."

The lady raised an eyebrow.  "Forgive me, I've met a lot of people..."

Vlad gasped!  Someone not remember HIM?  "I was the dashing young Lieutenant..."

She looked at him blankly.

"I was the one in the uniform who could pass for Rudolph Valentino..."

The blank look continued.

"I was the one who accidentally spilled punch on your dress."

The lady's face brightened.  "Vladimir!  I remember now!  I did love that dress, but we had such a jolly time after then!  Come in, come in!"

Dimitri and Anya both mouthed the same thing to each other: "Rudolph Valentino?!"

© 1999 AnyaMuse@aol.com
© 1999 AnyaCI@aol.com