Bumper Stickers.....

• I love cats...they taste just like chicken.
• Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
• Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
• As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
• Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
• Conserve toilet paper, use both sides.
• REHAB is for quitters.
• I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
• Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep.
• All men are Idiots, and I married their King!
• Work is for people who don't know how to fish.
• Montana--At least our cows are sane!
• I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
• Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition!
• Your kid may be an honors student but you're still an IDIOT!
• If you don't like the news, go out and make some.
• I Brake For No Apparent Reason.
• When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case heaven is like the IRS.
• Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
• Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges.
• I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
• Where there's a will, I want to be in it!
• Okay, who stoppped the payment on my reality check?
• If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
• Few women admit their age, few men act it!
• Tell me to Stuff It - I'm a taxidermist.
• IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
• Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!
• It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
• According to my calculations the problem doesn't exist.
• Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill.
• Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have.
• A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
• How can I miss you if you won't go away.
• Warning: Date's in calendar are closer than they appear.
• Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
• We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?
• We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
• He who laughs last thinks slowest.
• Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
• Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
• Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes!
• Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
• Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
• i souport publik edekasion.
• We are Microsoft. Resistance if futile. You will be assimilated.
• Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
• 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
• Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
• Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
• Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
• I'm out of bed and dressed, what more do you want?
• The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
• All generalizations are false.
• Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

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