Gracie Gets a Letter From Her Sister

George and Gracie graduate to more "brother" acts in radio

Oddly enough, the versitility of their acts allowed Burns and Allen to mold to any medium. Moving from the stage to the radio did not phase them one bit. Here is another brother act which aired during one of their early radio broadcasts.
George: Look. You got a letter from your sister, Bessie.
Gracie: Oh! Bessie!
George: What did she say? Did she say anything?
Gracie: Well, she's just wonderful herself. But her son, Willy...
George: Willy. Willy? That's the one with the high blood pressure. The one who sleeps on the floor to keep his blood pressure down?
Gracie: Yes, that's the one.
George: Smart kid.
Gracie: Yes.
George: Yes. What about Willy?
Gracie: Well, he broke his back.
George: I'm glad to hear that.
Gracie: Huh?
George: Broke his back? How did he do that?
Gracie: Well, on account that he's left-handed.
George: He broke his back because he's left-handed.
Gracie: Yes. Well, you see, what happened was he had a doughnut in his right-hand pocket and when he went to take it out with his left hand...
George: He broke his back?
Gracie: Yah!
George: Well you tell Bessie, the next time to tell Willy that if he's got a doughnut in his right-hand pocket to try to take it out with his right-hand.
Gracie: Yah. But that's hard to do when you have your pants on backwards.
George: He had his pants on backwards?
Gracie: Yes. Well, you see, what happened was he had a suit of clothes with two pairs of pants and he put one pair on frontwards and he put one pair on backwards.
George: Are you sure that he could GO either way?
Gracie: That's when the truck hit him.
George: The truck. What truck?
Gracie: The truck that didn't have its lights lit.
George: Why didn't the truck have it's lights lit?
Gracie: Because...he had...
George: Hold it. Hold It! HOLD IT! Did the guy in the truck have his pants on backwards or did Willy have his pants on backwards?
Gracie: Oh, George, you're trying to confuse me.
George: I'M confusing YOU!?
Gracie: Willy had his pants on backwards.
George: Oh. But the fellow in the truck; why didn't he have his lights lit?
Gracie: He didn't have to. It was daytime.
George: Uh-huh!
Gracie: Are you getting this now?
George: Oh, no, oh, no. Well, how's the fella,... but if he didn't have his lights lit didn't he see Willy coming?
Gracie: He didn't know it was Willy. He saw two pairs of pants coming toward him and he drove between them.
George: Good Bye!